Anemone Pie

Public Service Announcement!

2012-01-07T00:25:00.001-05:00

Okay, it's official...I'm tired of this blog. I'm not, however, necessarily tired of blogging, so, for those who might still read this, in the next few days (probably more like a week, knowing me), weird things may go on here and with stuff associated with this blog. In fact, since I tend to start out with flourishes and wind up fucked, I can see how I might actually wind up accidentally deleting stuff on this blog, or possibly the whole blog, with some things I'm going to try to do. If I manage to do such a thing and you don't want to take that opportunity to just be rid of me (which would make me very sad, but I'd live), I'll post updated info over on oopsie daisy...i said that?. If I get very lucky, I'm about to make a very deliberate change that hopefully will work and make it fun again. ;-)

Happy New Year and I hope it's going to treat us all well! After all, come December 21, we may die.
*nods*

It's November 1st!

2011-11-01T01:09:00.001-04:00

Today is a memorable day in my own history. 11 years ago and 2 hours from now is when I first found out my now ex-husband was a drug addict. Although we were separated and he was living at our office/house, we were talking about trying to stay together and had had a lovely night taking Jake and his friends trick or treating. He said he had to get back to the office to work, I left Jake at my mom's and went home to sleep. For the record, I, too, had dressed up for Halloween and was so tired that I went to sleep with part of my costume still on. I was a gothic fairy, lolol. At around 2am, I was awakened by a deputy at my door, who proceeded to turn my world more upside down than I ever thought possible. I still wore glitter, a fake tattoo on my forehead and left the house wearing no shoes...just sparkly socks. In hindsight and with the help of a couple of wonderful and caring deputies who knew I was clueless and were very good to me, it was the night I really woke my ass up and regained control over my own life. It's a tough but very good anniversary. :-)

So, enough of that stuff, let's talk Christmas! I'm a bargain hunter and love finding odd, unusual gifts for people I love. I also love a good deal in general...who doesn't? So, from now until Christmas or shortly thereafter, I'm going to post any deals I find interesting and hope they help someone else. Now, a few things you should know:

1. I use no affiliate links so feel free to click and know I get nothing out of this. I'm just doing it for fun and to maybe be a bit helpful.

2. Most of the things I find will come from the Slickdeals.net Hot Deals forum. I love Slickdeals and recommend you go check it all out...lots of good stuff to be found on the Hot Deals forum, though. Feel free to ignore me and just bookmark it, then check it yourself a couple of times a day. :-)

3. Always be sure to check ebates.com for rebates on things you buy. There are some other rebate sites, but I really like ebates.com best. If you shop online a lot, you'd be surprised at how these rebates can add up! Also, don't buy without looking for a coupon code. My favorite spot is currentcodes.com but you can always google, for example, "whitehouseblackmarket.com coupon codes" and try other sites. If I know of any coupons in what I post, I'll include them.

4. Good deals often end quickly, so don't be shocked if it's gone. Also, stores will sometimes oversell this close to Christmas and you'll get the dreaded cancellation notice a few days later. It's not my fault, so don't bitch at me!

So, let's go.
Here's a cool clock...looks like it runs on water. Also says it's good for people with lazy eye, which is what "amblyopic" means. Who knew? Not sure how all this works, but it could be a good, cheap gift for the person who has everything or, alternately, a teacher. Or someone with a lazy eye. I have a friend with that and I never know which eye I'm supposed to look at when I talk to her. Anyway, here's a link to the post...it could be fun or it could be some Asian person's way of laughing at us Westerners. It's a crapshoot. Oddly, I want this. Here's a link to the entire post so you can decide and do as it says. Water Powered Hydroenergy Clock

Need a portable hard drive for yourself or a gift? Here's a killer deal. Seagate® FreeAgent® GoFlex™ 1TB Ultra-Portable Hard Drive Trust me, I shopped hard for these just a couple of months ago and it's good. Again, I've added the link for the entire thread on the deal...read through it for info you may need first, before ordering. Looks like someone may have posted a deal for another one, too. This one reminds me, sometimes you have to actually buy a coupon on eBay to get a good deal. I've done this many times...it's well worth $1 or so to save $25. Just watch feedback for reputable places.

Does anyone still use checks? Great deal here. I only use checks to pay my lawn service and the local handyman, but I'm nearly out so I did this and got the ones with dragonflies. It works fine!
2 Boxes of Checks Wallet Duplicates for only $5.05!!

And lastly, here's some Pottery Barn Santa stuff that looks like it might be a good deal if you do this kind of thing.

G'night! And yay, Christmas is coming!

A letter to Janey.

2011-10-23T21:01:00.001-04:00

A little background here: When Gina died, a very sweet daughter of a dear friend wanted to cheer me up, so she made me some things. Her mama, however, is baaaad about mailing things on time (not that I share that trait *averts eyes*), and I just got it yesterday. I'm going to keep a few details private just to keep the girlie safe, but anyone who knows me well is going to know who this precious kid belongs to. If you don't know me that well, just enjoy the utter sweetness of this gift and know that someone out there is raising a good, kind girl.

Dear Janey,
I got your mail yesterday and thank you so much! It sure took your mom long enough to mail it, didn't it? ;-) I was thinking about Gina yesterday and missing her, so your gifts came at such a good time and made me very happy! I loved your letter and am glad you liked your Hello Kitty stuff and your dancing flower. I have one in my window, too, see? Every time I saw mine, I thought about y'all and that you'd like them, too. Glad I was right!

The picture you drew was excellent! It actually looks a lot like Gina did. :-)

Your letter just made my day! You write very well, by the way...lol, about as good as Jake and he's 20!

But I have to tell you, I LOVE my magnet best.

A kitty in a heart with angel wings...how perfect is that to remember Gina by? It's just beautiful!

I took a picture of my fridge to show you I have many magnets and stuff all over it, but decided yours needs to be right out in front. Your letter is under your picture so I won't lose it. :-)

I just can't thank you enough to doing something so nice for me and hope you don't mind that I've shared it with everyone here so they can see, too. I also hope you don't mind that I snagged a picture of you to add on so everyone can see the sweet girl who did such a thoughtful thing. I hope I get to meet you in person some day and give you a big hug!

Isn't she beautiful?

XOXO,
Lisa

Raising Jake.

2011-10-02T04:24:00.003-04:00

Some background you should know...I've caught hell from my family for how I've raised Jake since he was born. From not vaccinating (he is now, so spare me the silly emails), to unschooling and then homeschooling, to teaching him to not base his choice of who he loves on a set of genitalia, but rather on a person who treats him like he's the best thing ever and who makes him laugh, feel special and feel safe and who inspires him to feel the same....yeah, I've caught a lot of flack. But, the fact is, I knew early on he was different. No, not brighter or "gifted", I've never been one of *those moms because every kid is bright or gifted in their own way...no, I've just chosen to embrace his oddities instead of trying to pretend they don't exist. He's 20 now, and I'd not change a bit of that. I won't ever have a kid with some big title or retirement plan, but I've got a kid who knows he's free to dream as long as he works hard to make those dreams real and you know what? I'm happy with that.

Tonight, this morning, whatever you want to call it, at this very moment, Jake is at the Vampire Ball, performing his original music. He's been swarmed by fans (lol, albeit it probably less than 100), had many photos taken and is signing autographs. He's living his dream, even in small form. Would I love him to go to college or do something to further his education someday? Of course I would, but not now. Not at the sacrifice of what he's having tonight. There's time for that later but this? Won't wait. How many of us can really, honestly, say we've lived the dream we had at his age? I can't. My parents insisted I be more practical and I gave up my dreams but swore to myself I'd never do that to my kids. "They" say we always want better for our kids than we had and I do...I want him to have nights like tonight and am so very, very proud of him that he's worked hard enough to have even this much.

Someday, when he's older and has more responsibilities in life, I hope he can look back on tonight and feel good about himself. I hope he can not have resentment toward me or what he feels he could have been, had he just had the support. I hope the rest of our family can someday, somehow, realize that for *him, I'm doing the right thing in not forcing college or (God help me, *never) the military on him. I want him more for Jake; I want him to have no regrets. I want him to live his dream.

Lol, he looks scary tonight, hmmm? This is not the kid in blue velour pajama pants I usually have running around the house drinking apple cider vinegar in apple juice because he's read it's healthy, playing with the cats and watching Dancing With The Stars with me (he's rooting for David Arquette)...looks can certainly be deceiving, can't they? Yet, it is the same person. I hope people read this, see him, and realize that.

I'm so, so proud of him right now. Always. And I have no regrets about how I've raised him, even if it's hasn't been "normal" and even if he's not what's considered to be "normal". More power to us both for flipping off "normal" and being *real. And mostly, let's just hope he keeps an eye on his drinks tonight. Argh!

** Edited this morning to add: Welllllp, he learned a harsh lesson about following dreams last night. After all that, the venue had scheduling issues and several performers, Jake being one, didn't get to perform. He's so upset and I am for him, but it's still a good lesson. He might even appreciate what he *did get to experience in, oh, 20 years. ;-) **

Random thoughts and a deal on razor blades.

2011-09-26T03:20:00.000-04:00

Let's tackle the razor blade thing first...Jake needed new razor blades today, sort of urgently, since I'd bought the wrong ones the other day and he was leaving today (more on that in a bit). Within a mile radius, we have a Publix, Winn-Dixie, CVS, Family Dollar and Walgreen's. He wanted Schick Quattro Titanium blades and Walgreen's had the regular Quattro blades on sale for $8.99 but the Titaniums were $13.99. For four. Yes, *four. Razor blades are one of those things that make my asshole pucker up when I have to buy 'em, but hey, he's going to be gone a long time and I decided to suck it up. At the register, however, even the Titaniums rang up at $8.99. Yay! But to make matters even better, this purchase got me a printed coupon for $5 off my next purchase of more than $5. So, basically, I can go spend $5.10 and only pay 10 cents. Or, alternately, I got $13.99 blades for $3.99 and will pay for something I'd buy on sale there anyway. Probably nail polish. Anyway, with the purchase of *any Schick Quattro product, men's or ladies', and even the disposable razors, you'll get the $5 coupon for a future purchase of anything. This is a deal worth sharing. :-)

So, yeah, it's 3am and about 2 hours ago, Jake left out with a friend to spend an undetermined mount of time in Ft. Lauderdale. He will be back long before Thanksgiving, but that's all either of us know right now. I will miss him fiercely but am glad he's getting to experience a new area and see if it's a place he might be better off living in. Don't get me wrong, I love my kid and hate the idea of him moving, but this area offers nothing for him now. Just nothing. He has to move away to have a future and at least Ft. Lauderdale isn't that far away.. But here I am...kidless, alone, feeling sort of giggly at the freedom of it all. I"m such a piss-poor empty-nester. Oh, and his friend? Is cute. And a little...um...prancy. Hmmmm. :-D

So here I sit, it's past 3am and I'm having a glass of wine, bleaching my shower grout and trying to keep Tucker the cat from breaking in and licking the bleach. Does anyone else have a cat that loves bleach? Obviously, I'm going to be leading a wild life while Jake is gone, lol. I think tomorrow (fine, *today, whatthehellever) I'm going to make myself a honey-do list and share it. Maybe I'll even keep myself honest with pictures.

For now, I'm going to try sleeping in my bed. It's been over a month since I've slept in it. My back objects to being flat, I have issues with being on the far end of the house and so I tend to sleep in my recliner and Jake takes my bed since it's a full size and no one is in it. Still, in celebration of being freeeeeee and alone, I'm going to sleep there. I put fresh sheets and a fresh coverlet on, have a lavender tart melting and am going to try it without a TV, since my TV in there died. Wish me luck.

Goodnight to everyone.

(PS: I'm not bothering to proofread this so ignore any typos)

Passive-Aggressive Scrabble.

2011-09-14T01:43:00.000-04:00

Miss Arse and I play Scrabble on Facebook and she usually beats my ass, too. When we have an argument or she's in a foul mood about something, she starts new games even though we have several going and plays mean. I just opened up a new game and apparently she has something on her mind...

Click it to make it bigger.
I love how she wishes me luck...that's my clue it's about to get ugly on the Scrabble board. By the way, check out my letters. Can you guess what word I played back? :-D

It's the old lady's birthday!

2011-08-25T16:10:00.000-04:00

Nope, not mine or Miss Arse's. ;-) It's Ginger's birthday! Now, I'm not ordinarily one to celebrate cat birthdays (much), but when a cat turns 19 it seems to me it ought to be acknowledged and Miss Ginger is 19 today! Coincidentally, had I remained married to Jake's dad, we'd have been married 20 years ago today. But let's stick with happy things and celebrate the sweet old, bony furbag that is Miss Ginger. She's absolutely the most agreeable, kind, accepting and tolerant cat that ever lived and is happiest in a lap, having her belly rubbed. Or eating.

She does not like it when you wake her up, though, lol. See, Ginger's deaf now and a year or so ago was diagnosed with Cognitive Dysfunction Syndrome. That's just a fancy name to say she's sort of senile now...kitty Alzheimer's. It doesn't really bother any of us, least of all her, and provides for some amusing times. She will eat imaginary things off the floor (yes, they are imaginary, I'm sure!) and just chomp and chomp, then swallow and look very pleased with herself. She's stopped grooming so I have to brush and wash her up daily. She's become fiercely attached to some objects over the last few years and she will randomly kitten call and we have to get one of them to her quickly or she'll get so upset she gets sick. One is her feather duster, which she's actually loved for many years.

We named him Dusty. I don't want to talk anymore about that. :-P

Lately, though, she seems to find the most comfort in my remote when she's all discombobulated. She will seriously snuggle it and relaxes like a baby with a pacifier...so sweet. The remote doesn't have a name, by the way. Perhaps her oddest, and only aggravating quirk she's acquired with her senility is that she's completely forgotten she's supposed to pee in her litterbox...

...instead, she pees in a towel lined, galvanized bucket in my bedroom closet. Trust me, I'm not thrilled with this at *all, but what can you do? It was that or have her peeing on whatever struck her fancy at the time. At least I know where the pee is now, you know? She generates much laundry, so it's a good thing I love her. By the way, those shoes? Jake's. *nods* Back to sweet Gingie, 'cause it's her birthday, the CDS also causes her to do random and daring things she's never, ever done before.

Like this. This game lasted until she lost her footing one day and broke a fang tooth inside the bowl. I really hope this kind of stuff never happens to Miss Arse. Or me.

So, happy birthday to our silly old Poogie. We're so glad we've had her for 19 years and hope we get to see one more together, at least. And just because I've shared some fairly unlady-like, unattractive pictures of her...

...here's proof that even an old lady can still be beautiful. :-)

Destination Unknown.

2011-08-19T23:20:00.001-04:00

We all say we'll never be like our mothers, but then most of us turn out that way anyway. I said it and meant it. I just sent Jake off on a spur of the moment road trip with friends. They have no idea where all they're going or when they'll be back, only that one stop will be somewhere in Georgia since one friend wants to go back there to live. The others, including my sweet son? Will journey on to wherever a 12 year old Mercury Tracer and Facebook friends of friends with spare couches takes them. I armed him with a Walmart bag containing rice chips, Vienna sausages, Little Debbies and plastic forks, plus made sure he has his ID, two types of phone chargers, Claritin, an "in case of emergency" card, insurance card and $50. Adventures are fun, but I'm not funding them beyond some necessary money. Oh, and I gave him instructions on how to find a Western Union, just in case. Who knows where he'll go, what he'll see, and who he'll meet? How exciting, to just *go and see where the road takes you, though...what a cool thing to do. Soon enough, he'll be at an age where responsibility looms large and doing things like this won't be possible, not with the same sense of freedom. I just know it'll be a grand adventure, one I'm glad he can go on and one I wish my mom would have supported me going on at 19. Between us, though, I'm so worried and nervous.

It's a big, scary world out there and after all, he's still my baby. *sighs*

Update: Not an hour after he left, he texted to tell me they're still in town, tired, and may just start out in the morning...could I leave the door unlocked for him in case he comes in? Lol, really? Me and my friends would have slept in a rest stop 10 miles from home, just to not go home. My son, he's obviously not a good adventurer.

Beatrice's herpes...an update.

2011-08-10T15:26:00.002-04:00

Now *there's a post title not many people would put up, hmmm? ;-)

So, we've been busy around here. Y'all remember Bea was tentatively diagnosed with Feline Herpetic Keratitis, no? The options we had were basically that or cancer, and apparently they look very much the same. So, she responded okay-ish to her meds, I saw a little improvement happening slowly, and then I woke up to this in my face one morning.

Sad, sad, little Bea face and her eye looked awful, just overnight. I mean *bad, totally clouded over, lumpy, red patches...bad. Bea was very unhappy and Mama here was pretty panicked. We headed into the vet, where the poor thing didn't even insist on being in her carrier with her invisibility cloak on. They put her on the scale and she just stayed there. She was just a pitiful little girl. :-(

Our vet was not happy at all with how her eye looked and cancer was mentioned a couple of times as something that now needed to be considered. So, with a referral to an animal ophthalmologist (who knew those even existed?) in hand, we went on a 100 mile round trip to get a biopsy done and see what was really going on. Luckily, Beatrice is a great traveler, thanks to the fact I've tossed her loose in the car for short trips to drop Jake off places since she was a baby, but she's never made a trip like this before. I took half of one of someone else's Xanax, Bea wore her invisibility cloak in her carrier and off we went. I took no pictures of the next part since I was: 1) a basket case; 2) wary of taking pictures with one hand and driving with the other, considering the Xanax factor; 3) trying to not vomit. We get to the ophthalmologist's office and it's good...dark inside, no other pets but for an old, quiet pug with cataracts, so no real dogs to scare either of us...it's good. They take her in, burrito wrap her and, in no time flat, have the biopsy done and we're left to await the results. They had to scrape that sad eye, but once again, Beatrice showed off her manners and was proclaimed one of the sweetest cats they've ever dealt with. Apparently, I have the Eddie Haskell of cats here. ;-) After 15 minutes of waiting room hell, we go back in and the doctor gives me news that nearly makes me pee myself with relief...no cancer. Yay! On top of herpes, she's got Eosinophilic Keratitis and it's unusually aggressive, it seems. On that link, see the eye of that cat? That's exactly what her poor little eye looked like, but hey, it's not cancer and I was so damned relieved, I almost couldn't stand it. We got her new meds, many meds, lol, and got our asses out of there. I swear, I don't know if she sensed my relief or what, but once in the car, she pawed to get out of her carrier and I figured what the hell...driving in downtown rush hour traffic with a loose cat in my lap and a loose Xanax in my body sounds like a fun thing to do. I opened the carrier, she climbed out and assumed her favorite spot for car rides...partly on me, partly on the armrest, watching the world go by.

She was all "Let's go, Mama!" so off we went, garnering much attention at traffic lights. It seems people don't often see cats in cars, lol. It went very well until we got on the interstate and a semi passed us, rocking the car hard. She looked at me with pure terror in her good eye, belly-crept over the gear shift and back into her carrier. The rest of the way home, this is all I saw. :-D

Yes, I took a picture while I was driving. So sue me. How could I not document that bit of cuteness? Here are the new meds...9 drops a day, which she's become accustomed to and doesn't fight anymore, plus two things for her food.

The miracle drug has been the Prednisolone Acetate (steroids) and is, ironically, the exact stuff Miss Arse has to use daily in her cadaver eye the rest of her life. These two tickle me with their twin medications. Anyway, just one week into our new regime and just look at the pretty eye that's showing back up again! By the way, I balanced a bag of treats on my head to get this shot. I'm slightly ashamed of that.

It's still got a long way to go but it's just got a thin cloudy layer on it now, no lumpy stuff, no red!

I surely do love this goofy cat, in case that's not obvious. I know, you couldn't tell, could you? You're shocked. *nods* Part of why I'm sharing all this, though, is because it's easy to initially miss or dismiss these conditions as nothing serious and, in fact, it can be very serious for your cat. Not all vets can diagnose it, either, as we found out, if it's aggressive, and since it does mimic cancer in appearance. It *is fixable, though, and do not be put off by the potential cost of a specialist. I'm not one to typically talk money, but the entire visit to the ophthalmologist, including the biopsy and all of her meds, was under $200. Yes, it's a lot of money but not nearly what I feared it would be and not what a lot of people might fear and put off until something bad has happened. Luckily, I didn't put it off because seriously, who wouldn't want that face up there to be so happy again? ;-)

Also, totally unrelated, but I'm going to be messing with my blog some later. I don't like the layout anymore. For whatever reason, I can be a situational 'tard and just realized that hanging around with the whole MWOP/BWOP bunch and having a little sheep(le) dragging dead like that looks like I'm some radical anti-MckMama person and, in reality, I just thought it was cute. But yeah, I need to change it. I might even go private for a day to get it in order, but I'll be right back!

(Edited: Good God, I connected the "cadaver eye" link to a cooking post. Fixed *that!)

It was a (mid) Summer's Eve...

2011-08-08T00:51:00.001-04:00

So, look, we all know I'm pretty damn open-minded and we know I'm no big feminist, either. I'm also not easily offended at inappropriate things. Those are all understatements, by the way, so when something really does offend me, it's usually got to be pretty bad and the new Summer's Eve commercial? Offends the living shit out of me.

Really? "Show it a little love"? and "Hail to the V"? Niiiiiice. So, as women, it's not our brains or determination that get us places in life. It's not that we may strong ethics or principles, it's the simple fact we have vaginas and should be used for breeding, display and to make men feel like men with our admiration, and men are too stupid to see past our vaginas if we (figuratively, I hope) make them obvious? That was a badly constructed sentence, but whatever...this just bugs the snot out of me. Watch this, please...tell me what you think. Am I being overly sensitive and ridiculous? Have I lost my sense of humor? Or is this just damn degrading?

I need advice, please.

2011-07-15T23:47:00.000-04:00

I'll try to not make this too long-winded, but I think detail may be necessary and that means long-winded. Back when Tom and I split up, Jake, the cats and I left our house for the one we live in now. The house we were in was supposed to be sold and all profits split up between us and Tom was court-ordered to maintain that house until that time, even though I bought this place far earlier. He did not and the house went into foreclosure. That didn't stop Tom, his girlfriend (now-wife), Crackwhore Michelle (no, really, she is), from moving back into it, nor did it stop him from having his brother, Tim, move in with them. Various and assorted other people also lived in that house in that time frame, resulting in the the house becoming the local crack house. All of them are/were/whatever crackheads at that point in time and who knew crack houses could exist in really, really nice neighborhoods? Trust me, they do, and it's humiliating to even admit that, so very embarrassing, but it's part of my history and it plays a part in this problem. So, the lot of them had over a years notice of the auction date, but they didn't leave or get their stuff out. The house was auctioned and they were given 30 days to leave. Because I'm nosy, I was keeping an eye on things and they left with one day to spare...one freaking day. You'd think this is done and over, no? No. A few days later I got a call from the man who bought the house in the auction, irate, and blaming *me. It seems he had no clue, being an out of state buyer, that the house was a crack house and that the interior was destroyed. He found me (the crack heads were untraceable by then) and decided to dump his world of ire on my shoulders. Yeah, not so much. Once I got him calmed down enough to let me talk, I 'splained I'd not lived in that house for well over a year, told him who *had, and said that since he's made such nasty accusations against me ("What kind of filthy trash *are you?" and other ore colorful variations), I'd like to drive out, meet him and bring him pictures of the interior of the house on the day I left. Luckily, my attorney had instructed me to take pictures of every room with that days' newspaper in the picture, save the paper, and document I turned my house keys over to a deputy. I took everything with me and went to meet ol', mad Bob. When I pulled into the yard, I saw masses and masses of...well...garbage. It filled the huge front porch to the ceiling and overflowed out into the front yard and driveway. Bob and I, once he saw the pictures of how I left the place (trust me, *anyone could have moved right into that house, it was so spotless and nice) got along just fine and he asked me if I wanted to pick through the garbage to see if there was anything important to me or my son. Gah, now *there's a charming offer, and I'm getting to my dilemma, I swear, so hang with me. Anyway, he gave me three days and I spent all of them out there, sorting through the nastiest shit you could imagine but I stuck at it. Why? Because I'm a sentimental person and the very first bag I looked in, mixed in with maggot-y kitchen garbage, I found the silver baby spoon and fork that's a family heirlooom on Tom's side and was passed to us for Jake. In another bag, I found Tom's and Tim's graduation pictures. In a box of filth I won't even share the details of, I found Tom's trophies. So, I went back and dug and dug and dug some more, cleaning and salvaging anything I could. In the end, I filled two huge Rubbermaid boxes with things of Tom's and Tim's that could be saved...diplomas, degrees, family pictures taken in the early 1900's, childhood scrapbooks, photo albums, memorabilia from the deaths and funerals of various grandparents, books with special meaning, school year books, and the thing that made me most sad, all the cards Jake ever gave Tom. You know, the ones where they can't really write, so you hold their hands and guide them on a card they made themselves? Yeah, all of those. Anyway, my plan was to clean everything up and when Jake's great grandmother came to see him, I'd give them all to her since all of the old photos, silver and some other things were hers to begin with. I had no reason to give it back to Tom or Tim, since they obviously didn't give a shit about any of it. Well, in the end, Jake's great grandmother apparently never gave a shit about *him, since she never came to visit. Ten years later, here I am with these bins still in my house, a constant reminder of all the pain the time brought and I want rid of them. For the record, Jake has no interest in any of it since he's come to see these people for what they are. When I first got the stuff, I did give him his dad's trophies and framed a few pictures of his dad as a young boy for his room and he still has those but says I can do whatever with them, too. Here's where I need some advice and am asking what y'all would do with all this stuff? I'm most inclined to ship them jointly to Jake's great grandmother, mother and sister anyway (mother and sister are mean bitches of the highest caliber), along with a letter laying a lot of things out there that they they don't know because they refused to hear it...basically, unburdening my heart *and my floorspace in one fell swoop, finishing it all up with one big "fuck the whole, big, dysfunctional lot of you", only phrased more mannerly than that. As much as I hate them all, and I do because they fought hard to take Jake completely away from me, I feel like this stuff needs to be back in their family. But part of me also wonders why. I mean, if they didn't give a damn about Jake, why bother? And I've got some family telling me to dump the stuff, let it go and don't worry over it. A few say to send it back but with my letter, so my burdens are all dumped back on them, and some are saying to let them know I have it and the first one down this way can pick it up. Trouble is, that'll be Tom and really, I'm mean enough to want to everyone to see what he and Tim abandoned. At the same time, I realize they aren't going to give a rat's ass about anything I have to say and, in reality, are going to be pissed at me for holding on to all this stuff instead of giving it to Tom or letting them know I have it. Ugh. No matter what I do, it's only going to reinforce what a bitch I am in their eyes.

So, knowing the whole, drawn-out story, what would y'all do with this stuff?

Beatrice and her cloak of invisibility.

2011-07-08T00:09:00.001-04:00

Today, Beatrice had a follow up. It's official, she definitely has herpes. In her eye. *sighs* They say she was probably born with it. Look at my poor, sweet baby...I dare you to not fall in love.

She has to wear her blankie every time we go and, in fact, wears it at home when she gets scared or is very tired. How sweet is she, though? She just sits in her carrier the whole time, positive no one can see her. :-) She did perk up once, though...she heard plastic rustling and being opened. She just knew she was getting a treat, since that's what the treat bag sounds like.

Sadly for Beatrice, it was actually the sound of a rectal thermometer being prepared. I suppose some may find that to be a treat, but Bea does not. At least she's off all but one drop, three times a day, but forever and ever, amen, I have to add some stuff to *all their food to help prevent spread and future outbreaks in Beatrice. I'm also to keep her non-stressed, since stress causes outbreaks...this for the nervous girl who wears a cloak of invisibility. Ah, well, at least she didn't have cancer, although she would have rocked the one-eyed pirate look in her pirate ship. Arrrrr!

I don't wanna talk about the Casey Anthony trial right now. Bastards.

Doings around here.

2011-07-04T04:06:00.005-04:00

Well, didn't I just disappear? I wish I had excuses like an exotic vacation or moving to a fancy, new home but alas...mostly it's been due to my complete obsession to the Casey Anthony trial. And I don't use the term "obsession" lightly...I'm probably an expert on all this stuff now. My obsession started the first night the news reported Caylee missing (this is all going on the next county over from me) and hasn't let up since. The funny thing is how this whole area is obsessed...any medical office you go into, the trial is on. Traffic is noticeably lighter while it's on. People are discussing it in great detail in checkout lines and running errands during lunch recess. Most of us say we're on jury duty, lol, since we are there for everything the jury is and we deliberate amongst ourselves. The moment recess is called, friends and neighbors begin calling and texting to discuss what just happened. I've had 2 neighbors tell me church was near empty today (well, yesterday), since Belvin had court in session on a Sunday. I just don't know what I'm going to do with myself when this is over, y'all. Sleep in some? Mop, finally? Watch People's Court again?

But, I have had other things going on. A couple of weeks ago, we noticed Beatrice, The Casserole Cat's eye looked funky, like it had a murky, clumpy film on it. She's not a cat that looks you in the eye often (she's a shifty thing) and we keep the house very dark inside day and night, so it could have been that way for awhile. I took her to the vet, only to find out her eye was ulcerated. I felt awful. :-( See her poor eye? It's her left one, the one to your right.

The vet gave me several possibilities, from injury to herpes to toxoplasmosis to cancer. A week on antibiotics held it at bay but it was no better so now we're trying 2 weeks on antibiotics and an anti-viral drop. The assumption (hope? prayer?) now is that it's herpes or toxoplasmosis and considering I keep her litterbox *very clean, the vet leans to herpes, carried in from outside on hour shoes or hands. Seriously? Only in our family...only in quirky-assed Beatrice...could eye herpes come about. The anti-viral drops are working, proving this theory to be correct, though, since her eye looks some better. Jeeez, eye herpes in a cat. Between this and me having had cat scratch fever (no, really, I did in my early 20's and with every ridiculous complication possible), Beatrice and I have about covered all the possible STD-y sounding things that can happen between cats and humans. You want to talk fun, though? Try putting all this in a cat's eye and mouth daily:

2 doses of oral antibiotics, 3 doses of antibiotic ointment, 2 doses of anti-viral drops and 4 doses of Systane a day, none of which can be done together in one burrito-wrap of Bea. We spend all day burrito-wrapping and dosing, it seems like. I'm not bitching, though, *really...hell, I'm just grateful I didn't have to burrito wrap Miss Arse during her disturbingly similar ordeal. Let's see...what else? Well, I flooded. Well, not *me; that's not happened in years. Anyway, it didn't get in the house, so that's good and just ignore that semi-painted door and messy back patio. For the record, a few minutes after this was taken, that stray umbrella stand was in water. Ooooh, let's play "Find The Item"...can you find the shovel still in the ground? If you can, your prize is knowing that's where we buried Gina and forgot to put the shovel away. *twitch*

I made a 5 minute craft project. Jake was going to go to a Southern Pride festival and needed a hair bow. Whaaaaat? That strikes you as weird? ;-) I sacrificed a small Rebel flag for the event, cut the side off panel off where the stick goes in and tied it into a bow, then sewed a hair clip the the underside. Not too bad for a fast project, I thought. See?

He wound up not going to the festival but wore it to Walmart the next day to shop for jeans...with a Tennessee t-shirt cut up and a lycra tank underneath, a la Flashdance, Dixie-style. Have I ever mentioned how much I adore my son? Because I do. I guess the only other excitement is that anti-social me had a drop-in dinner guest and it was fun. She's an old friend from high school (hi, Tracey!) and didn't even know I lived here. She was driving by just to get away from family she was visiting the next street over, recognized me as she drove by and stopped to say hi. I was in a social mood, invited her in and shared dinner that was already planned with her. I did use my pretty fish plates, since she was company...see?

Tracey was a little disturbed to discover it was a seafood mix that contained squid and octopus along with shrimp, mussels and clams, but she was a good sport and insisted on trying it. I made a coconut and saffron basmati rice with scallions to go with it and she wound up loving it all! We had fun playing with the parts...

...I see a tentacle! By the way, I told her I had a sweet red wine to go with dinner, even though red wine doesn't go with seafood. She asked what kind of red wine it was. I repeated, it's *sweet and showed her.

Once she stopped laughing, she had to admit it's really an amazingly decent wine for under $3 a bottle. We went through two bottles. *nods* It was an unexpectedly lovely few hours and I hope we can repeat it next summer. :-) And lastly, as if anyone needs more proof that my son is allllll mine, we went to Blockbuster to rent a couple of movies. We each picked one, he handed me his as I checked out and I didn't even look at it. Once in the car, we examined the other's choice and this is what we each picked, his to the left and mine to the right:

How telling. :-D

PS: It's 4am and Blogger is being a pain my ass, not letting things space correctly between pictures and text. I give up and am going to bed. Just know I tried.

Foodnotbombs.net

2011-06-08T04:15:00.000-04:00

It's after 4am, I was awake, Jake is here, but my phone rang and I nearly had a heart attack. I saw it was my mom...heart attack number 2. Is she sick or hurt? No. She's upset as hell about this and can't sleep: http://www.wftv.com/news/28144821/detail.html She wanted to know if we could find out if we could volunteer with Food Not Bombs and, if so, go help. Really? My hard-ass conservative mom? I mentioned we might get arrested and she was fine with that, said it would feel good to take a real stand and at least people get fed in jail. I'll be damned. But, I'm with her...I can handle a criminal record for this. "Why were you arrested?" "Oh, I fed some homeless people even though it was against the law." Yeah, fuck *that, bring it on. So, I'm going to find out if they can use us and if so, we might wind up on the news, lol. For real, though, I love my mom for this...this story has been weighing on me, too. It should never, *ever be illegal to feed people who are hungry.

I get why people don't like large groups of homeless people gathering up. They smell bad, pick-pocketing is rampant, drug sales occur, other crimes can take place...they panhandle, they accost, they can be scary. I get it, really. But in the end, they are still people, human beings, and they are hungry. Who in the hell has the right, and who *gave them the right, to tell me or anyone else we can't give something as basic as *food to hungry people, regardless of their numbers, circumstances or location? Food, and forgive my liberal-ass self for suddenly emerging here, is a human right to have as long as someone is capable of voluntarily giving it. To arrest people for providing food to hungry people because they want to and can? Boggles my mind. It really does. How shameful in America. It is, it's just shameful.

If you want more info, please go and help if you can. Lord knows I have no trouble asking people for money to help others, lol, so if you can, even a dollar helps. See? http://www.foodnotbombs.net/dollar_for_peace.html

*grumbles*
Arresting people for feeding the hungry, my ass. I don't think our founding fathers *or God would like that, do you?

A tale of pee and genetics.

2011-06-03T01:21:00.004-04:00

Brace yourselves, I'm going to talk about my pee. Yesterday, I noticed it was somewhat dark, a telltale sign I'm not drinking enough. Um, stuff like water, anyway. :-D So, I set to work drinking tons of water, tea, chemically diet soft drinks (note that I refrained from saying "cokes", lower case, and then specifying the cokes were Dr. Pepper and nasty Sierra Mist), and juice. Today, my pee was normal again *cues canned applause* and all was well. Only when I went to pee a bit ago, it smelled funny. Smoky, like BBQ pork. Um, that can't be good right? I'm a little freaked out and come in here to Google "my pee smells smoky" and came to the conclusion I either have low DHEA levels or am diabetic. Google it, you'll see. Terrific, now I'm scared. I decide to ignore it and distract myself so I go out to check my mail and am bowled over by the smell of smoke and as I step out into the open, ash is falling. Fires? I go back inside and check the bathroom...sure enough, the window is cracked open. Dammit, Jake! But it's still a good PSA...if your pee smells smoky, like bacon or ham, it's not a good thing. File that away and remember I might have just saved your life and I didn't take pictures. You're welcome.

Pee aside, tonight I was looking through some old pictures and found some cute ones of my grandmothers and one even included my mom. Want to see? Thought so.

This is Mamaw. She didn't really have a crease across her face in real life but she really did have the gold tooth. It's okay, my dad had two. Someday, I aim to have a grill. *nods* Anyway, she was Cherokee and Lumbee and could do cool things like heal people up with herbs, beat Papaw up when he got drunk, deliver babies, skirt the law and ride horses. She was mouthy, feisty and loved wrestling on TV. She was also fiercely independent but a caregiver and a wonderful friend, mother, mother-in-law and mamaw. She lived with us for a few years and we alternately wouldn't speak to one another and then turn full of secrets together. Her hair was down to her butt and it was a daily event, brushing, braiding and then pinning it up. I used to love to brush her hair while she told me stories about our family and sang to me. I know now she told me things she hadn't told anyone else. She died when she was up in her 90's, when I was in my 20's. I miss her every day, still.

This is my Mammy, with Mamaw.

Mammy had the distinction of giving me white blood, lol, since she was half white and looked to be about 300% so. While Mamaw was an "other side of the tracks" kinda girl, Mammy was a "has a housekeeper" kind of lady, yet the two became fast and forever best friends. They'd travel together with my parents, sharing a room and giggling like teenagers...they were avid practical jokers, my dad generally being the butt of their jokes. Together, they were dangerous and man, did they like being together. And having adventures.

Like trespassing in someone's cotton fields. From Mammy, I get my farm wife's bosom, my defiant smirk, my lack of shame and my willingness to wear knee-hi stockings with dresses. Oh, yes, I have done so. In later years, she developed an affinity for Hawaiian print muumuus and dye-to-match orthopedic shoes, coupled with funky glasses and lots of jewelry. Anyone who knows me in real life is laughing right now and nodding. From her, I got tacky. She would totally have talked about her pee, too. She died fairly young, in her late sixties, after years of complications from being diabetic. She lost a leg and half a foot to it in the years before she died and she taught her grandkids all we know about alternative uses for prosthetic limbs and how to fall out of a wheelchair and not even be able to call for help for the laughter. She taught us all how to make fun of people, too. I learned a lot from her and so miss her, too.

My dad was the amazing photographer behind most family pictures I have. He took this one of Mamaw, Mammy and my mom, which I have framed and in my living room. :-) And who do you think was behind my now-famous (at least in my own mind) little walker icon, after shoving red sunglasses on my face and a red pacifier in me?

Yes, indeed, he's the guilty party. It's okay, though...I'd wear them both again to have him back. I miss my family tonight. Think it would be weird if I went to Mom's and let myself in, then crawled in bed with her? I guess it would be, huh? I'll just wake her up early and tell her about my pee event. She'll laugh, apologize for not having her teeth in, and the world will be good again. :-)

G'night, y'all.

Trial watching - Casey Anthony.

2011-05-24T19:35:00.000-04:00

Foreword:

I'm obsessed with this case...I have been since the outset and I have no shame in it. I was obesessed with the OJ trial, but not so much the case itself. For the record, I think he was guilty as hell, but had I been on the jury, I'd have been forced to find him not guilty, as well. Next was the Jon-Benet Ramsey case. One of my first real experiences on the internet was joining my aunt and cousins, along with my mom, on a mIRC chat called Cybersleuths, which was heavily devoted to the Jon-Benet Ramsey case. So, yeah, me and mysterious criminal cases? Love 'em. This case has the best of it all, plus it occurred relatively close to me, so even our local media is full of coverage. That being the case, I'm hoping at least a few of you are also watching the trial and up for discussing it with me, sometimes maybe daily, other times, maybe not. I'll try it for a day or so and see how it goes, see if anyone else wants to talk about it and exchange theories and thoughts. That all said...

DID YOU SEE IT TODAY? Damn. I was expecting the pool story, the rumor has been floating around, pardon my pun, for awhile now and the rumor/hints of sexual abuse have, too. But somehow, hearing it said out loud in a courtroom was surreal and shocking. As I've processed it all, I have to admit Jose Baez put on a good opening statement. I went into this with a fairly open mind, believing that Casey definitely was involved in Caylee's death, but that it could well have been an accident. Today, I still think this. I don't believe she committed first degree murder; I still believe it was a bad, bad negligent accident and she handled the aftermath beyond poorly.

Do I believe George molested Casey? No, I really don't, although my mind is open to being proven wrong on that. I do think Casey's brother, Lee, may back her story up...I think he loves his sister enough to sell George under the bus in order to try to protect Casey, particularly since it's not like George faces any criminal charges. Let's see...the loss of Dad's dignity and reputation versus the loss of Sister's life? Yeah, I think Lee is going to back the defense's story up and try to save his sister. And actually, I'm not sure George and Cindy won't do the same, albeit in a more subtle manner. Wouldn't many parents sacrifice their reputation for their child who they genuinely feel is innocent of anything but negligence and mishandling in their grandchild's death, but who is facing death by lethal injection unless something is done to save her? I would, for Jake, if I truly believed him.

As for Roy Kronk, I think he's basically an asshole, but I think the defense looked plainly ridiculous in trying to incriminate him in anything much. Roy's girlfriend was a jail employee who came into contact with inmates when Casey was first jailed. That's the only coincidence I have much faith in. I suspect she heard Casey tell someone, possibly Baez, where Caylee's body was, then, knowing boyfriend Roy was a meter reader who walked that area and that he was in arrears in child support, rushed home saying, "Roy, guess what I heard? I know how you might be able to get money!" The shortest distance between two points is always a single line and in this situation, Roy's girlfriend seems to me to be the shortest line.

So...do I have any fellow watchers? If so, please join in and let's discuss the crap out of it!

Goodbye, Gina Marie.

2011-05-20T22:57:00.000-04:00

You were part of our family for nearly 19 years, but today, it was time for you to leave us.

I remember the first day we brought you and your sister home...I'd only wanted one kitten and insisted she be a calico. I finally found your sister at the SPCA and she was so darn attached to you, that I couldn't split the two of you up. They warned me you were sickly and might not live long...they didn't even charge for you. You looked kind of rough, but you came home with us, too.

It took 2 weeks to get your eye cleared up and opened and another 6 weeks to get you over a bad intestinal infection. That was such fun for us all...only not. But your sister loved you and obviously, so did your new daddy. This is how the 3 of you slept all night, that first night. I was glad your sister was happy.

As time passed, we realized you were going to live and that whole free cat thing? Yeah, not so much, nearly $1000 in vet bills later. But it was okay...you were part of the family by then, and your sister loved you.

Although I was always your favorite person, you would worry when Jake was sick and stick right by him until he was better. Then you'd resume your attempts to smother me in my sleep so I could be yours forever and ever. Even today, when I held you, you wanted to lay on my face and lick me. Everyone called you Velcro Gina because of how you'd launch yourself onto me and cling...you were an annoying thing but I secretly liked it.

You and your sister helped to homeschool Jake when I had to work. I never told you how much I appreciated the help, but I did.

You turned out to be my adventurous, fearless baby, much to my surprise...no place was too high, too scary, too far for you to explore and make your own. You learned how to get up there when the others couldn't and you were the one who learned to push the screens out of the windows so you could go hang in the backyard with the dog. You had no fear of a gigantic Rottweiler, but he? Was your slave, mostly because you scared him with your braveness.

And for all my bitching and moaning about you and your whiny, weird, velcro ways, I love you very much and I'll miss you. You were part of my life for nearly half of it and Jake doesn't remember a time without you in his.

But today, you were just so tired and your poor little stinky ears hurt so badly, we knew we had to stop putting it off and do the right thing for you. So, goodbye, my sweet little Gina Lemon Verbena and thank you for being ours. *sighs* Your sister misses you tonight and is trying to find you. Take care of her, okay?

Love always, Mama

How to cook like me...a baking edition.

2011-05-16T19:11:00.002-04:00

So, back during my steak and kidney pie escapade, my sweet friend Trudy suggested I bake everyone something. She had a good idea, so I went through my recipe book and then it dawned on me - I'll make y'all an old favorite around here. Something I usually just make for holiday breakfasts and such. I know you're wondering if I'm going to use...um, parts...for this and I am! I'm going to use the bacon part.

Mmmm, bacon. Who doesn't love it? Bacon even makes Jews and Muslims sinful, at least some of them. *nods* But now, what fun is bacon? I mean, everyone makes bacon, right? Sure. But does everyone make bacon cookies? I think not! You're going to, though, after reading this...trust me, you will! They're good! Are they the best cookies ever? No, probably not, but they're very tasty and everyone loves the novelty of eating a bacon cookie so they'll probably be a hit in your house unless you're super-observant or something and really, bacon is worth risking Hell for. So, get your pen and paper ready to write all this down.

First, fry your bacon. The recipe makes roughly 30 cookies and calls for 1/2 pound, fried. I use a heavy 1/2 pound...like 3/4 of a pound...because hey, it's bacon and you can't get too much. What you see above was fried last night and was fresh out of the fridge, which is why it might look a little stiff. For the record, I fried 2 pounds because, you know, it's *bacon. Oh, and a tip - if you like chewier cookies, don't fry your bacon until it's crisp. Make sure it's done but keep it limp. We're limp bacon lovers in this house but it's up to you. You want a crisp cookie? Fry your bacon to death. It's not my business.

The ingredients are pretty simple...your bacon, 2 cups of raisin bran cereal (if you really like raisins, add maybe 1/4 cup more or pick extras out of the box), 1/4 teaspoon of baking powder, 1 egg, a stick of salted butter, 1 cup of all-purpose flour and 3/4 cup of white sugar. Now, a few options: If you have any on hand, about 1/4 teaspoon of maple extract is nice to add in if you love maple. Also, this is a sweet cookie and the bacon is subtle. If you want to add 1/4 teaspoon of salt or Bacon Salt, you can and it'll enhance the bacon flavor more. I don't since I try to watch my sodium. *laughs*

Offer some bacon to the sweetest old lady cat who ever lived (19 this August!) and fuss at her for being on the counter, knowing full well she's deaf and has no clue and wouldn't give a shit if she did hear you. When she rejects your bacon, eat it yourself, despite the fact her nose and mouth actually touched it.
Whaaaaaat? It's not like I can add it to the dough now.

Tear your bacon up into roughly 1/2" bits. Eat some. After all, the recipe does really call for 1/2 pound and that gives you permission.

Add your butter and sugar together and cream it.

Add the egg and cream that, too. By the way, if you get thirsty, these go well with bacon cookies.

Anyway, around this time you should preheat your oven to 350 and prepare your cookie sheets however you do them. I use parchment paper because I like to live the dream that I'm rich and parchment paper is one of the ways in which I do so. You do whatever you usually do with cookies.

Add your flour and baking soda. Mix. And seriously, if you're going to make these, those fancy Kitchen-Aid mixers will screw it all up. You have to use a 10 year old Black & Decker hand mixer with most of the attachments missing.

Now you dump the raisin bran and bacon in. Mix it by hand until everything is well incorporated.

It'll look like this if you didn't fuck it all up. I had to use a heavier cooking spoon to mix with, since it becomes a fairly stiff batter. Oh, God, I heard 3 of you snicker when I said "stiff". Stop it.

Place teaspoons full about 2" apart. It's important you use the ugliest cookie sheet you can find.
Okay, not really...all of mine are ugly. Anyway, bake them for 15-18 minutes at 350. 15 keeps them chewier.

Have y'all ever seen these? They are such a great invention! I think the company is "Neese" that makes them and they are just wonderful for bags of cereal, chips, crackers, etc.

See how they seal up my cereal with a zip-loc top? And you get 20 for around $2.50. These are the large size and 10 mediums come in the box, too.

15 minutes later and the cookies are out...they aren't the prettiest things ever, but that's okay. Neither am I. Or you. :-P

The recipe makes a plate full and see how good they look? Sweet, gently bacon-y, chewy goodness. Don't you want to make them now? If you do, don't forget that since they do contain meat, you should refrigerate them. The cookies do warm up nicely in the microwave, though, and are excellent dunked in hot coffee. Show of hands...who is intrigued and thinking of trying them?

A post-Mother's Day post.

2011-05-09T01:54:00.000-04:00

So, yesterday was Mother's Day (still today in my mind since I've not been to bed)...

Some comments from Miss Arse:

Upon seeing I was wearing the gold hoop earrings she gave me when Jake was born, the same earrings I wear 90% of the time and have now for nearly 20 years since they were *that special to me: "I see you're wearing the earrings I gave you...I'm shocked you've not lost one by now."

After taking Jake to Publix and Walgreens with her, him looking for all the world like Courtney Love after a rough night: "People were staring at him, Lisa, but I just pretended I didn't care. We all have our crosses to bear."

The other day, on a shopping adventure we had at Lowe's, she bought herself a new chainsaw. I made her swear she'd not use it without at least calling me first, so I'd know to check on her later. Like in 10 minutes, lol. "Guess what I did this morning? I chainsawed out all the arborvitae under your old bedroom window!" Upon scolding her for not calling me first: "Oh, I just said I would to shut you up."

After looking over the good dinner I'd made us...BBQ ribs, fresh-scraped fried corn, french fries, salad..."This all looks so good, but you *are starting your diet back up tomorrow, aren't you? Not that I'm pushing you, because you know you need to lose weight without me pointing it out."

Background on this one, but my first Mother's Day after Jake was born was awful. His dad took my car and chose to spend the night before out with his brother at a strip club, got too drunk to drive and didn't make it home until the next afternoon. When he came home, he presented me with a card and a tacky necklace with Jake's birthstone in it, expecting me to be thrilled. I accused him of picking it up on the way home as an afterthought. He denied it to the point he made my life a living hell for about a week. A few weeks later, I was cleaning my car out and found the receipt for the card and necklace shoved under the seat of my car...bought Mother's Day afternoon, on his way home. My mom, reminiscing: "Remember your first Mother's Day? It was bad, wasn't it?" Yes, it was, Mom...thanks for reminding me.

And her best one? "Remember the year you sneaked and moved out on Mother's Day?" Me, bursting into tears as I do every time this is even *thought of, since it's one of the things I feel most guilty for in life: "Yesssss, and I'm soooo sorry. *tears flowing* I was just young and screwed up and stupid." Miss Arse: "Oh, Honey, I didn't mean to make you cry...I don't care anymore."

So, if anyone wonders where my lack of tact came from and why I constantly work on fixing it and constantly fail miserably, now you know. I'm fighting against genetics and it's hard. Or maybe...just maybe...I secretly like being this way. ;-)

PS: I had a really nice day with her and Jake...it was good. I hope yours was, too. Tomorrow, she and I start our Casey Anthony trial obsessing. Anyone else going to watch this with us?

500 blog hits later, I'll elaborate.

2011-05-05T05:04:00.001-04:00

Yes, 500 blog hits on my Geronimo post...had I known, I'd have put ads up! What tickles me to no end is that not a single person left a comment. I had a very small handful of "your (sic) a traitor/ignorant/Muslim" emails and that was it. I must admit, this leaves me curious as to the lack of comments with so many hits and the random emails. Those who emailed, why not say it here? Ah, well, you must have your reasons. *coughchickenshitcough*

So, since that last one was so all-fired popular and I'm wide awake at 5am, let's just go wild, shall we?

First off, I don't hate bin Laden. Never did, never will. In fact, I've got some admiration and respect for the man. Freaked out yet? Well, that's on you. I admire and respect anyone who feels so damn strongly about their religion, their principles, *anything, that they are willing to devote their life to and even die to protect those values. Now, try...TRY...to remove bin Laden from this equation and read what I just said again. Do you not agree? Do you not find it admirable to devote your life to and even die for your beliefs? Of course you do, even if others find you evil and want to kill you for it. What if that's the case? What if others find you evil, wrong, a threat? Are they justified in killing you, if so? What if your beliefs caused the deaths of others, even if you never actually killed them with your own hands, because they were so alien to the beliefs of those others? Would your opponents, those others (random thought: who just had a "Lost" moment?) be justified in killing you? Now, let's think about bin Laden again....substitute him for you in what I've asked up there. Is he still so evil? Was killing him still so justified? You don't have to tell me...all I ask is that you try to keep your mind open and answer yourself honestly there. Now, let's try this: Let's put Jesus in bin Laden's place in my questions up there. After all, Jesus was a religious zealot and rebel in his time and many, many lives have been lost in the battles both for and against Christianity. Now, am I equating bin Laden with Jesus? Nope, I'm not...I admit, I am giving an extreme example to drive my point home in a lot of heads. My point? Sometimes evil, as with beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. There are no absolutes. Do I think Osama bin Laden was evil? Not even remotely. Was he a rebel, an extremist? Yep. Would I have done as he did? Nope, but then again, I'm not a fan of violence in any form, be it what he orchestrated or what our own military is doing these days. Do I admire him for devoting his entire life to what he felt strongly about? All day long. You don't have to agree with someone's core values in order to admire them for their dedication to such. That's a lesson we, as Americans, often aren't taught. It's a shame, that, for without that lesson, this world will never have peace.

Now, going back to bin Laden and what I freely will admit is my defense of what he's done, I'll ask you to indulge me in another mental game, if your mind is open enough for it. Ready? Let's go. Say you and many of your family all live on the same street and have for what amounts to forever. Sure, you have your bickerings and fights, but in the end, what matters is family. You know, the whole "I can say shit about her because she's my sister but I'll be up your ass in a heartbeat if *you say shit about her because she's my sister!" thing. It's a good thing, love ruling and having one another's backs against others, isn't it? So, let's say a family from two blocks away, newly moved in compared to your family, decides they don't like how your entire family, all homes, parent. Or your religion. Or the values your family feels strongly about. Screw them, you think. Right? But what if they begin marching into your family's homes, one by one, using force, and demanding that your family do things their way? Now, let's take a moment here and look at that family and what they are saying...they genuinely believe their way is best for your family. I mean, really, they do. They just think your family is too old-school, too antiquated in its values, to know better and they want to help you advance and see it their way, since they genuinely believe their way is so much better. And they are so damn sure of this, they feel it's perfectly fine to march in your front door without invitation, use force even with injuries, to have you do it their way and then do the same with all your family-neighbors on the street. Yes, some kids may be killed in the process...some men may lose their wives and your sister? She might lose her husband and your mom may lose your dad when he tries to protect his home. Tell me the truth...how would you feel about that? In your own heart of hearts, as the saying goes, how would you feel? And what if weird Uncle Joe, the family black sheep, said "Enough. Just enough. I'm going to try to stop these people from 2 blocks away and show them how it feels!" And 9/11 happens, killing innocent people, yes, but fewer innocents than than the obnoxious neighbor two blocks away killed. Of course, they call those innocents "casualties of the war" we caused by not living as they do. I call them my brothers, sisters, uncles, Mom and Dad, my babies. Again, be honest with me...how would you feel about weird Uncle Joe now, for doing whatever he had to do to stop this? Personally, I'd be my weird Uncle Joe's biggest fan. He had the guts to try to protect our family when no one else did...go Uncle Joe! Defend us, make them stop it! In fact, I'd be inspired to help Uncle Joe. What about you?

Now comes the hard part. We, the United States of America, *are that family two blocks away. That's not up for debate...we just are. And let's replace the block full of your family and their homes with the Muslim countries. Weird Uncle Joe? Is Osama bin Laden. Ask yourself now, how do you feel about what Uncle Joe did? I still maintain it was admirable and anyone who came into our family turf, so to speak, and killed Uncle Joe? Yeah....they deserve what they get from here on out.

We went into someone else's home 2 blocks over and abandoned everything we are supposed to stand for - we shot an unarmed man whose only resistance was in failing to raise both hands when directed. Then we flipped off his religion in how we disposed of his body and I'll be damned, our family not only is okay with this, but cheers in the streets about it.

Count me out of this. I'm an American and I dearly love my country but I do not, not even a little bit, love what it has done and stands for right now. I am so ashamed for the United States of America. I'm not a bit ashamed to be American, though...I have hope for my country. I have hope that we will, one day, be a peaceful and peace-making nation with a strong defense but with a true, dare even I say true *Christian, understanding of what "defense" means. I have hope that one day, America will act as Jesus would have done.

Right now, we have no sense of that.

Code name: "Geronimo"

2011-05-02T18:47:00.002-04:00

That's the code name our government used for bin Laden, have you heard? My initial reaction was fury...yep, fury. How *dare they? Geronimo was a good and decent man who did nothing more than defend his people against those who invaded the land of his people, determined to take that land at a cost of whatever death and destruction it required since those people were, after all, savages...of course, he fought back and that? Makes him the bad guy. Anytime we try to go in and take by force, or instill by force, our own desires, well...only bad guys fight us on that, dontcha know? We go in to people's homelands and kill, maim, steal but it's all in the interest of making the savages' lives better so it's a good thing...let them fight *back and they're bad guys, or terrorists.

Wait a minute...wait a damn minute here...maybe "Geronimo" wasn't such a bad name for bin Laden at all, now that I give it some thought. Maybe it was just exactly *right, in fact.

How to cook like me...the royal wedding edition.

2011-04-29T04:39:00.004-04:00

I've got to be honest here...I actually made this dish a few of weeks back and was saving it to post soon but realized that today, with William's and Kate's wedding, would be a very appropriate time. So, the whole idea stems back from a conversation I had awhile back with a very British elderly neighbor who loves food but doesn't cook much and was reminiscing about his favorite comfort food as a youngster. I sort of made a mental note that I'd love to make his favorite dish for him sometime. Cut to a few weeks ago and I'm at Winn-Dixie and spot a key ingredient. I grabbed it. The fact that I was vaguely disgusted tipped me off that this was going to be fun! I ran home with my special ingredient, praying I had everything else I needed. I did, I did! So, in this edition of "How to cook like me", we're going to make...

steak and...

...kidney pie! Yep, I found kidneys. Now, I've never eaten kidneys and I grew up hearing horror stories from Miss Arse about how her dad loved kidneys and it would make the whole house smell like rancid urine when her mother cooked them, so let me admit right now that I was wary. But intrigued. Very intrigued.

I assembled the ingredients I thought I'd need...meats, 'taters, puff pastry, mushrooms, onion.

And seasonings, also deciding to go with baby bello 'shrooms instead of regular ones at the last minute.

I thawed and pounded the hell out of my weird cuts of sirloin. Hey, they came out of a multi-packaged family pack. We can't expect much here, okay?

After removing 3 layers of plastic wrap on the kidneys, I was down to the final layer of plastic wrap and becoming a tad more disturbed by what I saw. What I thought were many small, individual kidneys were now beginning to look like, um, one big one. From what could only be a Zord sheep. Ugh, I prayed this wasn't true. I also decided this was a good time to actually look for recipes, lol, instead of relying on what an old man told me from 50 years ago. It seems I was pretty set on ingredients, a game plan and I was also told to "trim" the kidneys of tough tissue. Uh-oh.

I dumped it out on my cutting sheet and immediately discover why it was encased in 4 layers of plastic wrap. No one wants to go in Winn-Dixie and be reminded of John Wayne Gacy.

I also confirmed that I was actually the proud owner of one, and only one, kidney and said kidney had...pods...on it. *gags* At this point, I really wondered if I can do this. For whatever reason, I could do the tongue, the cheek and heck, I've cooked brains but this kidney might be my undoing.

Flipping it over did not help. Not only did it have gristly, waxy thing in the middle, it had a *insert squeaky voice* duct hole. A. Duct. Hole. For what could have only been urine. But hell, I'm not about to let organ meat stop me, so I grabbed it and washed it good in cold water and ran water into the *shudder* duct hole. While I'm at it, I copped a good feel of the whole thing, trying to find out about this "tough tissue" thing. I felt tough tissue in every fucking pod and it all grew out of this weird, waxy white thing. God *damn.

While the water was running, Beatrice decided she'd like a sippie and it was a much welcome break for us both. Ignore my water bottles in the background, I'd just emptied my trunk.

With a new enthusiasm, I began cutting the pods off the kidney. This was the best I could do and I did a little scraping, at that. I did smell it and it smelled a lot like normal ol' liver, but with an odd, faintly sweeter smell. The smell actually reassured me that this could be okay...

...until I spotted the Duct Hole. Again. I poured myself a glass of wine, tossed it (not the wine, no point in *that) in the sink and pretended I never saw it. I took all of my kidney pods and dredged them in seasoned flour, then proceeded to brown them up good.

See? This is looking better, isn't it? And it smells like liver, so once again, I felt reassured. I wasn't picking up on any of the nasty urine smell my mom remembered but am figuring that since they killed their own sheep, maybe they just didn't rinse those Duct Holes (forever capitalized in my head) well. *gags again* But still, I'm game and not about to be defeated, not even when I spot what the lid says on the bottle of oil I pulled out of the cabinet to fry the kidney pods in.

Uh-oh. And oops. Well, I'd not used it for anything but okra and onion rings, so hey, added flavor, right? I thought so, too. Journey on! I decided to scrub the sink and counters of all the blood and ook that has splattered while my pods browned up some.

As I go to clean the sink out, I see this. Duct Hole, she mocks me.

At this point, I had some slight problems occur. My main kitchen light burned out and I had no replacement bulb, so I was stuck with this one light over my sink to cook by. It was getting dark out and frankly, I'd lose a lot of enthusiasm for this project. I decided to quickly brown the now-cubed and floured steak, deglaze, refrigerate the whole deal and start again tomorrow.

They say you should always cook with a good quality wine, something you'd drink. I agree and deglazed with this. :-D

Oh, look. Yummy. *eyeroll* Into the fridge it went, once I made room. Oh, hey, want to see in my fridge pre-room being made?

I'm the nosy sort and love seeing in people's fridges and cabinets. Closets, too. Yep, it's an old one...18 years old, I do believe. Hey, it works, so why change? Can you find my bacon grease, my leftover shit-on-a-shingle, my multiple bottles of hot sauce and salsa? Oh, yum, salmon cream cheese...I need more of that.

I felt considerably more on my game the next day, especially since Duct Hole was safely out in the garbage can. I added all of my assorted ingredients, including water, sauteed onions, taters and mushrooms, carrots, chopped parsley, beef bouillon, Worcestershire sauce, salt, pepper, bay leaves, herbs de Provence, additional lavender and, upon discovering I had no tomato paste and unwilling to make a trip out, a big squirt of ketchup. Because yes, I have lavender and no tomato paste...it's weird, but whatever. I let all of this simmer for 2 hours and I must say, it smelled wonderful!

Once the bottom layer of puff pastry was baked for about 10 minutes, I dumped a lot of my mixture on it to hide where it swelled way up in the middle and then did a last taste test, in case additional seasonings are needed. I got a piece of kidney on that one and I'll be damned, it wasn't bad. In fact, I liked it.

A covering of more puff pastry, an egg wash and into the oven it went 350 degrees for about 40 minutes. I didn't really time it, I just pulled it out when it looked golden.

Here was the final product...since this was an experiment, I got a chunk, as did my mom, Jake and my British neighbor, who(m?) I encouraged to be honest. He really liked it! He said he could have done without the bottom crust at all (I liked that part but wish it has been less soggy) and said my top crust could have been puffier but that overall, it tasted like what he grew up with and hoped I made it again. I did notice that while none of the recipes I found mentioned adding the 'taters, he stressed his mother did so I'm not sure how authentic the 'taters are to a true steak and kidney pie. Nonetheless, it was a far bigger success than I expected. The kidneys tasted like a very mild liver, so Jake and I really enjoyed it and even Miss Arse found this to be tasty as long as she didn't think too much about it. The end verdict is that, despite my gagging and shuddering and despite the ominous presence of Duct Hole, I *will make this again. I do think I may use calf liver next time, though, and just not tell anyone it's not kidney...no one will be the wiser. Trust me.

Who is going to make it next? ;-)

Miscellaneous crap.

2011-04-26T02:46:00.001-04:00

I haven't checked my sitemeter in ages...until now. Some searched terms that found me?
"Some really fuck up stuff"
"e-whoring Mafia Wars" (ftr, I don't play)
"maxine waters all look the same to me"

I'm proud of this assortment. Also, someone from State Farm in Bloomington found me. *waves* I don't think you're supposed to be reading my blog at work, but hey, we can keep it between us. ;-) I hope you can forgive me for the fact I'm about to take my policies elsewhere. It's nothing personal, mind you...it's all about saving money these days. Didja see where Aegeon sold their reinsurance division to Scor? That worries me a bit. They had to sell out in order to repay Sweden (or is it Denmark?) back. That tells me this isn't a particularly lucrative business anymore and that bodes ill for most everyone, if I'm right.

Here, I found this interesting. I don't do anti-depressants but if you do, you might want to read this. And cry. Or whatever it is you do. Antidepressants, OTC Painkillers Not a Good Combo - FoxNews.com Ignore that it's from Fox News...as long as it's not political stuff, they can be trusted.

Lastly, do you live in the South? If so, here you go. It's helpful, really! Southern Savers

Ditto, Dad.

2011-04-25T05:39:00.001-04:00

Another Easter has come and gone and another Easter made me miss my dad all over again. Easter was his holiday. He hated holidays that required real shopping, decorating or stress but loved a holiday that allowed for some sneaking around. Halloween was a good one for him, too. But Easter, he really loved. He enjoyed coloring eggs and would draw tacky-ass shit like toilets and roadkill with the magic crayon in the egg coloring kits, just to make me laugh. Then, after I was asleep, he'd set to work with his carrots and Cocoa Puffs cereal in the backyard, creating the best messy bunny and poop trails ever. I actually bought into the Easter Bunny a good two years after I knew Santa was a lie. But the most amazing thing was that every Easter morning, just after I got up, he'd say, "Oh, look, Lisa! It's the Easter bunny!" and I'd look out back and sure enough, there would be a huge brown rabbit in the yard. Granted, we lived against a bit of wooded area but every single Easter morning? That's odd. One morning he told me that Mrs. Bunny had stayed behind to have her babies and I remember going out into the chilly, damp morning barefoot, the tail of my nightgown getting all wet, and seeing a little nest of babies up against our house, nestled in some pipes and mulch. I was sold on the Easter Bunny, let me tell you. As an adult, I asked my dad about those bunnies every Easter, since we lived out the woods with Jake and we never had that kind of luck. He just laughed and said he would ask them to come. Riiiiiight. I wondered about this statement, though, since I'd seen firsthand that he could actually communicate with animals to a degree (remind me to tell y'all about our Irish Setters sometime because the stories are amazing) but I still blew it all off as a coincidence. I mean, who does that...you know?

Saturday night, it's late, I'm going in and out my back door to do laundry and sent up a quick little prayer. "Hey, Dad, if you still hear me, will you send me a bunny in the back yard for Easter, so I know you're still with us?" I got up yesterday morning and peeked out back. Nothing. Went out and looked around. Nothing. Honestly, I just sort of laughed at myself, even though I was a tiny bit disappointed...I'd been foolish in hoping. I fixed my coffee and was sitting down at the computer when my mom called. We wished each other happy Easter, made our plans for the day, I filled her in on some gossip and before we hung up she said, "By the way, would you believe I saw a big, fat rabbit in the backyard this morning? I had to laugh, it reminded me so much of your dad and his Easter bunnies. It's been years since I've seen a rabbit at all." Well, damn, Dad, I guess I forgot to specify which backyard I wanted it in, didn't I?

Then, my dad always called Jake his little lamb (when he wasn't calling him a baby girl, lol, so it's no wonder Jake has no gender lines) and all four Easters they were together, he bought Jake a lamb stuffed toy. Yesterday morning, Jake walks in the door after spending the night with a friend and I'm cleaning the bathroom on the other other end of the house. I holler out "Who is it?", as I always do, and the answer I get back is not the normal "It's me!"...oh, no. I hear "It's your little lamb...happy Easter!" I came out fast and demanded to know why he said that. He laughs and tells me "I don't know, that's just what came out when my mouth opened. It's Easter...relax, Mom!"

Good enough, Dad. :-)

I love you, too, and thank you.

A year in pictures.

2011-04-17T12:43:00.001-04:00

I've been thinking about this place lately and miss sharing things. I know, because I'm such a sharer, right? Whatever, I do miss it. I've been wondering why I let it go and think I just became very unfocused or something. Let's go back to this time last year, shall we?

Right around this time last year, Miss Arse lost her sight. She wasn't blind as in the world went dark and she needed a service dog named Libby or anything. I mean, hell, she's got me, right? Right. She could see variances in light and dark, she could tell if something was large and red although she'd say it was purple and have no clue it was a firetruck. But she wasn't Stevie Wonder, either. So, what happened? Wellllp, she neglected cataracts for over 25 years and they rebelled on her, causing massive infections in both eyes and fusing to the corneas in both, one worse than the other. So, repairs began since doctors just swore they could fix this for her and she was game to try.

The poor old bird was also terrified, as you can see here. This was in the waiting room, just before her first surgery. We both had to take Xanax on this day and I still had a panic attack that necessitated me sitting in my car, reading an IKEA catalog and trying to not vomit the whole time.

Once it was over and I had her back home, she was good. Of course, she was also drugged, but hey...she was happy. It was an unusually long removal that involved both laser and knife, and she wound up with a destroyed cornea but hey, she didn't die. It was a good day!

I think the corneal transplant nearly killed her, though. Doesn't she look dead? Actually, the transplant was super-easy on her but she had to lay in bed 48 straight hours on her back, facing the ceiling, with only momentary breaks to pee or eat. After hour 6, she wasn't so much fun anymore.

After hour 30, I was desperate so I loaded her in my car and drove her to my house so she could sleep in my bed and be entertained by my cats while I crawled into my recliner and ignored her. You know, just for a change of pace. It was during this time we began calling her Old Cadaver Eye, for the record. Desperate times call for desperate measures when it comes to amusement. As you can see, it was an exciting time for us all. And yes, my bedroom looks that boring most of the time. What*ever, it's clean.

While the transplant went well and by God, she could see out of that eye again, they had to tweak the cadaver flesh because a stitch (ewww!) malfunctioned. That deal went so well she didn't even have to wear a patch *and she got good drugs...see? She was showing her nifty new cornea off here.

Once that eye was repaired and healing well, they tackled the other one. Luckily, they saved her cornea but this time she didn't get the good drugs and things went harder than they thought. It hurt her very much and she was whiny so I bought her a Whopper and made her coffee. As you can see from the noticeable lack of happiness on her face this time, Whoppers and coffee can only do so much when you hurt. But, in the end, the doctors were right and while it took 9 months to get her there, she can see so well now that she's quilting again. And...discussions are underway to buy her a pickup truck soon because she's going to get her license back and she wants to be able to haul stuff. Lord, I love my mom. :-D But, for these 9 months, I was busy-busy driving her to multiple appointments and helping with the 30+ drops per day she had to do at one point, in addition to cooking and cleaning for her, plus just keeping her company since she couldn't see her computer or TV. In the end, I hope if I ever see 82 that I'm mostly like her. One of these days, I might even tell her that.

In the midst of all this eye drama, Beatrice gave up sleeping in the casserole dish and chose the center of the couch instead.

She's adorable no matter where she sleeps, isn't she? One of my old lady cats (19 this August!), Ginger, had other plans and not only stole Bea's casserole dish idea...

...she tried to make it better. Or warmer. Or something. A cookie sheet sort of thwarted her plan, though.

No one fretted over the dish sleeping; she was just stringing us along because she had an axe to grind. We tuned her out.
Bwahahahahaha!
*pauses*
Sorry.

And no, my cats aren't spoiled. Why would you think that?

Jake had a busy year. He turned 19 and got his first ice cream cake ever. Go him. Maybe when he's 20, I'll let him get a driver license...

That's kind of pitiful, I suppose, but hey, he's lucky I didn't get him a chin implant to go with it.

I did, however, get him very cool "doll eye" contacts...one blue and one violet. No, he's not spoiled either.

Then Christmas came...he got tons of junk and taught Miss Arse to play Rock Band. And the best part? She could see it! She still sucked but dammit, she could see it!

His best friends got him the tattoo he's wanted since he was 14 for Christmas. I maintain that with friends like these, no one needs enemies. It's the ugliest damn tattoo ever, but he loves it and hell, I guess he really did want it since he waited 5 years for it. At least it's a nice job, all straight and such. But really...Manson stuff? On your arm? At least get Bowie. Let's see, what else? *digs through pictures*

Some idiot ran over my mailbox. I believe this makes 6 of them in 10 years. Take it from me - don't buy a house on an inside corner unless you like disposable mailboxes.

We grew hot pink mold. That's special, right? And kind of exciting, too? Only it's not really mold, it's a bacteria called Serratia marcescens. I have no idea what started it but it's been an ongoing battle in towels, shower and toilet since it started and it comes on fast. Like in hours. What you see on that towel happened less than 12 hours after that (freshly washed) towel was used and dropped in a hamper. It'll grow in a shower or toilet that was scrubbed a day or so before and it smells like Fritos or the pads on dogs' feet (which are interchangeable, by the way). I now buy a lot of bleach. *nods*

I did do some cooking and took pictures of one dish, planning on a blog post but it just never happened. I made trotters for some elderly neighbors who love them. As for me...?

Even I'm not eating this stuff. I do have limits.

So, let's see...what else? Oh, back to Jake for a moment if no one minds. His music has really taken off and, as such, he's been able to get in backstage at various concerts and hang out with the musicians. Apparently his new thing is to take "surprise!" pictures with these people.

Here he is with Alice from Crystal Castles. I was sort of horrified by the look on her face and asked him if he stank. He said no, that someone had just hit her in her face and her mouth was bleeding and she didn't want that shown in a picture. Well, alrighty then. But as horrified as I was over poor Alice's expression, the one that came next was worse.

He licked Gary Numan. You know, *this Gary Numan, one of my all-time favorites. And all I get to do is fight pink mold and cook trotters. Life isn't fair...not a damn bit fair.

The other interesting thing that happened is that Jake nearly became a statistic. He'd gone to a club to see (and probably lick) The Dead Kennedys. While there, someone drugged his drink. Yep, exactly what you hear about in the media and figure will never happen to you...well, it happened to him. Thankfully, he was with a group of excellent and caring friends, as well as the father of one friend. They were able to see something was terribly wrong and call for help quickly...they saved his life. I get the dreaded call no parent wants from the dad at around 1am, saying he's at the hospital with Jake and I need to hurry. I hurried. When I got there, this is what I found and I was scared *shitless.

He spent a couple of days in the ICU because they had a little trouble getting his heart regulated and he was so terribly stomach-sick, but within an hour of me arriving, they knew he was going to live and I was able to relax a little. I took this picture so that all who see it will know (almost) firsthand that this can and *does happen. People will drug your drink. In the blink of an eye, in one dumbass move on his part that he's probably done a million times - turning his back on his drink - he very nearly died. And I still cry every time I see this picture and realize how close I came to losing him.

So, that's it for my photodocumentary of what's been going on in my life. I know, you wish we could trade lives, don't you? It's been a long, rough year and in the end, Tucker had the best idea...

I should have found myself a nice old sari and covered my head with it, then relaxed in the knowledge that I was safe because no one could see me. Ahhh, were it all this simple...

Heh, look who's back.

2010-10-10T03:54:00.001-04:00

It's been what? Two months? Yeah, well, those things happen and the only reason I'm back now is because it's almost 4am, I can't sleep, Farmville won't give me my stupid candy container and I'm too aggravated to redecorate my farm. I'd walk away from it...okay, *them, since I have two farms...except I've...um...put a little money into them. I don't want to talk about that anymore. Thanks.

So, blogging. I've actually been thinking about blogging in general lately, which is another reason I've not been doing it. Don't get me wrong, it's not like chewing gum - I really can think about blogging and do it, too. It's that *what I've been thinking about it sort of put me off. Now, before I go any further, let me just say that people who blog to keep families far away updated with tales and pictures? Totally get it. People who blog with a purpose, like the women who crockpotted every day for a year or someone giving day to day experiences during adoption? I get that, too. My friends online, true friends, who post pictures of their kids and vacations? I love going and looking, I truly do! But it's because I know and care about these people and their families on a personal level first and foremost, and pictures/tales are my only way of sharing that part of their lives with them. But people who blog just to take parts of their mundane lives and jazz them up and expect people to fawn over them? "Ethan is so brilliant! He pointed to his peepee sticking up in the bathtub and called it a periscope!" Yeah, not so fucking much, sorry. What's worse is when these same people post all over the damn internet, acting like they want to be a part of whatever community or activity they're in at the time but in reality are doing it to try to drum up readers for their dumbass, boring blog. It's wickedly arrogant to actually think that very average you and your very average kids who do very average things are so interesting that people will care. These same people are the ones who ask people for comments, put people on the spot to follow them and are just generally an annoying pain in the ass. And frankly, I just don't want to be one of them, I don't want to be looked upon like that. It's really been bothering me, thinking how damn arrogant it is of me to think my life is really all that interesting, you know? Hell, I bore myself and I'm easily amused. I think it's even made me a little bit paranoid and icky-ish, since there have been things I've wanted blog about and stopped, thought, "Wow, would anyone really care but me? I don't want people to feel like they have to be polite..." and I didn't bother. Then, enough time passed that I have been a bit embarrassed to come back and try to explain all this, not to mention the added pressure of feeling like it would be arrogant to do so. In case you've not noticed, given half a chance, I could run myself insane with over-thinking.

So, here's the deal - I'm back and I might stay back. Or I might not. A lot of it might depend on that Farmville candy baskets, if I'm perfectly honest here. But the only way I can do this and not feel obnoxious about it is to make it clear that I will never, ever be hurt if someone, even someone I care for, is bored and doesn't want to bother reading my crap. I also will never, ever be upset if no one comments. I never was before, for the record, but I just want to clarify it. If I'm going to try this once more, it's going to be purely so that if I drop dead tomorrow, my family will find this little corner of the internet and have a small piece of me to read and smile over. Should anyone else actually like it, then hey - bonus points.

Also, I'd like to make a prediction: Mom-blogging is on its way out unless the mom in question has something incredibly unique and freakish going on in her life. I'm trying, for once in my life, to be a trendsetter and figure out what the next big thing will be but so far, I'm stumped. And really, I just want my candy baskets, goddammit.

I'm not like her yet, but maybe someday...

2010-08-09T02:51:00.004-04:00

I was raised by a couple of fiercely over-protective parents. My dad remembered what all he got into as a teen and it scared him for me. My mom, on the other hand, got into nothing and was going to make damn sure I didn't either. Quiet honestly, they took it to a ridiculous extremes...their individual worries fed off one another and made them both nervous wrecks. As a result, even though I graduated high school at 17 and was immediately accepted into FSU, they did not allow me to go...it was too far away. Instead, they "graciously" allowed me to go to the local community college and even bought me a car, but checked my mileage at the end of each day to make sure that's the only place I went. I wasn't even allowed to go to Orlando, only 30 miles away, without begging and pleading. Curfew? For a college student? Before dark on weeknights and I could pick one weekend night to be out until 10. Suffice it to say, that didn't work for me. I moved out, secretly, 3 days after my 18th birthday. My 18th birthday was the final straw, in fact...back then, 18 was the legal drinking age in Florida and it was a rite of passage to go to a nightclub on the beach called Brassy's for your 18th birthday. I was the last in my group of friends to turn 18 and most of them were good kids from good families, yet their folks had okayed the Brassy's adventure with cautions to not let anyone drive who'd been drinking and call if they needed rides home. Many of the parents actually rented a hotel room within walking distance for the kids that night, just to make sure everyone was safe. So, the day of my 18th birthday came and my 2 best friends, who(m?) my parents loved like other daughters, came to get me. I told my folks we were going to Brassy's, Mary wasn't drinking at all due to medication she was on, so she'd be fine to drive and I promised to have no more than 2 drinks. I thought I was being all adult and responsible. Instead, my mom forbade me to go to "a bar like trashy people do" and told me I needed to stay home. We argued and argued badly. I caved and agreed to not go, told them I'd be home by 8, that I'd just go to visit friends. I remember my dad just looking ill, knowing this was bad. Instead of Brassy's, I went to a couple of friends looking for room mates and signed on. 3 days later, while both my folks were at work, I moved out.

I always swore I'd never, ever repeat their mistakes and I know a lot of people swear that, then when they have kids of their own and they revert right back to how they were raised. I have not. I was *that suffocated, that angry, over how they treated me and felt so strongly that they were wrong that I have not parented like them at all. One example - we've had co-ed sleepovers here since Jake was 11. I stay awake all night and watch them, but it is nothing for me to have a living room full of teenagers, male and female, in various stages of sleep. I let couples sleep near one another so they can hold hands but they have to be cocooned in individual sheets or sleeping bags. And I check. Often. All night. I've always let Jake go to co-ed sleepovers, as well. I mean, really, it's not like he was going to do anything he couldn't do otherwise. Miss Arse? Was and is always disapproving. She gets this same tight-lipped look on her face that my old Irish Setter would get when she spotted a squirrel in a tree. That didn't bode well for the squirrel and it hasn't been good for me, either.

So, this weekend, Jake heads off. with my blessing and my money, to the Anime Festival in Orlando. He's going with one couple and another girl I think he likes. Basically, two couples. Hey, he's nearly 19 and he's upfront about them all getting a motel room together for the weekend and actually asks if I mind him going. My own-mother-self thumps my brain and I want to scream NO!!! and be a bitch if I have to. But my rational self kicks in and says, "Okay...just be super careful, call me if you need anything at all except for bail, which I won't do, and have a great time!" Off they go and I head to my mom's so we can go grocery shopping. Not an hour into them leaving, Jake texts me to give me an update...lol. Miss Arse and I both laugh since he always texts me within an hour of being apart, regardless of which one of us leaves. Over the course of the weekend, I've heard from him several times, just checking in or replying to my telling him something, even if I say he doesn't need to reply. So, she calls me around midnight, just before she goes to bed, to ask if he's home. I tell her no, he asked if I minded if they stayed one more night since they were all tired and I told him it was fine, especially since our a/c is down. Miss Arse? Gets very quiet and I'm braced for the criticism because I'm not doing it as she did and that is generally wrong, not to mention immoral. Instead she says, "You know, you're a better and smarter mom than I was when you were that age. I wouldn't let you have that freedom so you fought and took it anyway and kept your distance. You've let go, you've given him his freedom, and he stays close even if he's not in the house with you. I wish I'd done that with you." Yeah, I wish she'd have done that, too, because I'd have totally never left home for years, considering how much I love my parents. And I'd have known every payphone in this county personally. But the fact she said this, acknowledged this? Means the world to me. Lord, I love that old woman fiercely...she's might be nearly 82, but she's still learning and embracing what she learns, accepting that things change. And she's not too proud to admit when she is wrong. Finally...after all these years...I can say that I hope I'm like her someday, because she's turned into an amazing mother and grandmother these days. How lucky am I, having her as a mother and Jake as a son? Even if he is off in some hotel doing God knows what.

The new mop.

2010-08-07T06:41:00.000-04:00

So, some of you know of my deep and abiding love of my special mop. I have a mop thing, sort of like my scent thing, and I can't resist a new and better looking one. Let me add in here, I have three problems to work around - rheumatoid arthritis, hard floors throughout my whole house, and I'm cheap so I don't want to buy expensive canisters of solution since I mop often. In the end, about six years ago, I found this mop and bucket system and love it. I mean, I genuinely love it. O-Cedar UltraMax It was perfection in a mop...no hands touching, no bending, it goes behind toilets and up under couches, long handle for us tall people, pad cleans the floor very well and I can use my own pretty smelling cleaners...then toss the pad in the washer when it's done, all good again. What's not to love, right? Except they discontinued it in the US, the bastards. I've made that poor pad last over 3 years but it's shot and I was faced with a choice - do I order a new pad for around $30 shipped (yes, just for the pad) from out of the country, or do I suck it up and mop shop? I've been mop shopping. Nothing. Miss Arse has a Libman Wonder Mop and loves it, so I borrowed it. I wasn't thrilled because it involved a lot of bending over to wring it when you do an entire house. For her kitchen, dining room and two small baths? It's a great mop,. no question. It wasn't for me, though. So, I'm getting all braced up to lay some money out for a new UltraMax pad when I stumble across something brand new at Publix. I found this: O-Cedar ProMist. Let me just tell you about this mop because it is wonderful! Maybe even better than my beloved UltraMax. It is like a Swiffer WetJet in that it needs no bucket but it is oh-so-much better! The head swivels, the container is refillable so you can use your own cleaning solution or just plain water, it takes no batteries and it gives you a choice of replacement pads...a microfiber one that is washable for months and months of heavy use or semi-disposable ones that I can get 10 for around $8 and they can be washed 3 times each. It also will use Swiffer Wet Jet pads. After looking at it, I think it will take *any pads that attach with velcro, so you know. My house is small, around 1200 square feet. I just mopped it all and had to refill the canister once. I also removed and thoroughly rinsed out the microfiber pad while I was at the sink doing that. No big deal at all since I empty the bucket and rinse the pad on the UltraMax once midway, too. That's it, I've found a mop that beats my perfect mop! It's not cheap initially, so you know. It was $22 at Publix but I do get a $5 mail-in rebate on that and since it beats the nearly $30 for the replacement head alone on the UltraMax, I'm thrilled. So far, I've not found it at Walmart but when it hits there, it should be a bit cheaper. I swear, I should be a product tester or something, shouldn't I? ;-) I'm not, though...I'm just me, always on a the hunt for things to make life easier and cheaper. This mop is amazing and I'd recommend it to anyone, no question. It's the best mop I've ever had and I can't imagine anyone expecting or wanting more from one. My once-beloved UltraMax is now the official utility room/emergency second mop. And that? Is something I never thought would happen. For the record, I used Mistolin brand cleaner in Gardenia scent and it smells wonderful in here. Also, for the record, I should be in bed instead of writing this post.

They all look alike to me.

2010-08-05T04:02:00.002-04:00

For a few days now I've been debating about talking about race, especially since it's all over the news right now. When I read the story of the Greta Van Susteren's show's screw up , I decided it was time. So, here's the deal...they screwed up and showed a picture of Shirley Sherrod during a segment about Maxine Waters. It was a stupid as hell mistake but now the show and Fox News is being accused of being racially prejudiced by confusing pictures of the two. The whole "they all look the same to me" deal that seems to get people all twisty-butted is being dragged into it. Let's really look at statement and talk about it honestly, shall we? I mean, completely independent of this particular stupid screw up, since, as a new agency, Fox should have been more careful. That said, is there not a lot of truth to the whole "they all look alike to me" phenomenon? I'll own it. When I look to identify people, I start with hair color/texture/style and race. Show me a picture of *frantically tries to think of someone recognizable* Madonna and put me in a room full of people to find her and I'm going to search the room for a head of blonde, wavy hair first. In a room full of middle aged, attractive blonde women, my first instinct is going to be that they all look alike and I'm going to have to work a bit to find Madonna. What about you? Put me in a room of Asian women and ask me to pick out Margaret Cho and I'm going to flounder for a bit even though I really like Margaret Cho. I'm of mixed race but if you put me in a room of medium-skinned brunettes and asked me to point out my cousin Susan quickly, I could probably do it *only because I know her so well and having seen her so many times in my life, I'd know to look for her unusual eyebrows and jawline. Ask me to find Soledad O'Brien and it's going to take me some time. I have a dear online friend who is a pale-skinned, freckled redhead approaching 40. She's beautiful and I think the world of her but put her in a lineup of other 40-ish redheads with freckles and I can't promise I could pick her out at all. So, let's go back to Greta's show...both of these women, Shirley Sherrod and Maxine Waters, are middle aged, reasonably attractive black women in the news and with no unusual features such as a huge nose, scars or crossed eyes to set them apart from one another. Is it possible that they were confused due to physical attributes of their race, but not due to racial *prejudices, as is being implied? Of course it is and those are two very different things. Want proof? Let's say two somewhat well known young actresses, Kristen Bell and Elisha Cuthbert, are in the news this next week. If, say, Robin Roberts was telling the story about Elisha and flashed the picture of Kristen instead, do you think anyone would screech about it, call it racist? Or was it just an honest but careless mistake? Take a look.

Yep, they both look alike to me until I start really analyzing features and then I realize they don't look anything alike but for general hair color and general paleness of skin. But here's the big question - would Robin have to go on and on and on about how horribly, horribly sorry she was for this mix-up? You tell me. I'm betting not. But Greta did.

And with this post, I start. Buckle up. :-D

Four Eyes.

2010-07-31T01:32:00.002-04:00

So, after 3 eye doctor appointments, one with a new specialist, I got new glasses this month. FIVE pair! Or is it pairs? Anyway, I got a "free" pair by using a coupon at one doctor but had to choose from the "Medicaid - Medicare - Coupon" selection since I had a coupon. I wasn't thrilled with them. Once my other appointments were done, I came home and went shopping online. Let me add now that for the first time since I was 13, I made the difficult but necessary decision to lose the contacts and exclusively wear glasses so what they look like has become much more important to me. Let's face it, though...money is tight for many people and glasses are terribly expensive unless you have vision insurance, which I do not. A year or so ago I bought some glasses from zennioptical.com and while I was fine with their service, their quality on their cheapie frames was somewhat...well, cheap. For the price, though? A great deal. I'm not telling you to not use them at all...just don't expect $200 frames for $8.00 from here. Plus, when I ordered from Zenni, I made a huge mistake in not measuring everything on a pair of glasses I already liked and comparing the measurements. I wound up with several pairs of glasses too small for my face, but that was my fault. That said, I did get a pair of prescription sunglasses from them that look a lot like Ray-Bans and are very sturdy and very nicely made. I love them muchly and wear them nearly every day. This time, though, I did a search on SlickDeals for eyeglass deals and found a buy1get1 sale at eyebuydirect.com. It's over now but don't let that deter you...their prices are still amazing. So, I get my new coupon glasses that, while ugly, are a good height and width for my face and I measure the hell out of them. Then I spend 2 days shopping and finally decide on 4 pair (s?), 3 normal, single vision ones and 1 pair of prescription sunglasses. My entire order came to just over $26, shipped. For 4 pair(s...whatever). I figured if I got just one pair I loved, I got a great deal. Anything more than that was icing on the cake. I'll add here that I did nothing but single vision lenses...no scratch coating, no superthin plastic. Bare-bones but for the one pair I had tinted. It took nearly 2 weeks for them to arrive but when they did, I was excited and worried both!

Here is how they come packaged. I ripped the shrinkwrap partially off in my excitement before I remembered I should take pictures. Heh. It was like Christmas and once again, I was 12.

Each pair comes in a very sturdy hard, clear case that has some padding and the blue cloth with water droplets is actually a lens cleaning cloth. Nice touch, although Zenni does the same...it's just not as cute.

Ahhh, my first pair and I knew the moment I opened the case I was in business. Loved them. Well made, don't look cheap....yay! Me and my Kodak EasyShare don't take the best pictures ever but they are coffee colored metal frames and far, far nicer in quality than I expected for a pair of $7.95 glasses (and yes, that's both the frame and the lenses). They are amazingly sturdy and just plainly pretty for being glasses. I knew at this point that if I hated every other pair, it was okay.

And so, accordingly, I pretty much hated this next pair. I'd wanted blue frames for ages but this blue is so dark you can't really see they are blue. Then the earpieces are silver, my mistake for not noticing that part, and very, very thin. My lenses are so heavy that these thin, flimsy earpieces make the glasses unsteady on me. These will be donated. With some trepidation, I open the next box...my next two are the identical frames, violet metal half-frames, but one pair with dark tinted purple lenses.

Check 'em out! Love 'em! These are a bit bigger than the coffee colored ones but not at all overpowering...I wish I could make the color of the metal show up better, too. It's such a pretty deep purple and I'm not normally a purple fan but it seemed like a good idea and in the end, it was. I love these as much as the coffee colored ones. And that leaves the last box...the sunglasses. Let me tell you, I debated long and hard about purple lenses but in the end, I decided to go for it. And go for it, I did.

I know, I laughed, too. It's okay. I put them on and laughed even harder. Jake tried them on and laughed. They certainly are purple. See?

Just so you know, unless you're into the hippy trippy thing, stick with gray or maybe brown. But here's my confession...I love them. I mean I *really love them. I don't often wear things that really attract attention and oddly, these do. People comment. Me? I just love how everything is purple...lol. These alone are worth the entire cost and the fact I also love (but with slightly less passion since they have clear lenses) 2 of the other 3? I feel a bit like I just won the Poor Vision Lottery.

So, are you intrigued? Thinking of ordering some yourself? Here's a few things you should know: You do need a prescription but it doesn't have to be current. They will not check with your doctor. You will be happiest if you take a pair of glasses or sunglasses you already have and like and then measure the hell out of them. A cloth tape measure works best for this but a ruler will do and it needs to have metric measurements. On glasses you already know you like the size of, measure each lens from top to bottom, then again side to side from widest points. Then, measure the frame itself from hinge to hinge. Jot all this down in metric. The other measurement you need, since I just know everyone is going to rush to order eyeglasses online after reading this post *grins*, is your pupillary distance. Some eye doctors won't give it to you but you can measure your own. Here's a good video and it's very easy with a little help, a bit harder but still doable alone. How to Measure Your Pupillary Distance (PD) Lastly, really look at the pictures closely. Look for details you may hate but that aren't terribly obvious by glancing, like rhinestones on the earpieces (almost made that mistake) or other oddities. And the last thing I'll mention is how easy it is to adjust them once they arrive. Trust me, it really is easy. Let hot tap water run over parts you need to bend and then do it bit by bit, gently. Be gentle and they will not break. If the left side seems low, for example, bend the left side earpiece down. That seems opposite of what you should do but trust me on that - it will raise the lens area up. Once the glasses are level, gently bend the nose pieces to a comfortable position if yours have adjustable ones. I promise you, it's easy and nothing to be scared of doing.

I hope this serves as a type of PSA and that someone is able to get some much-needed new glasses out of it. If so, let me know! And I know you want my purple sunglasses...who wouldn't?

Tucker and the casserole dish.

2010-07-22T18:23:00.000-04:00

I caught this going on a little earlier and grabbed my camera. Now, y'all can see what happens and why the dish is where it is. This is his typical method of eating and it's a good thing he's so stinkin' cute!

I sure do talk about that casserole dish a lot, don't I? I wonder what that says about me...?

And the winners are....

2010-07-21T12:13:00.000-04:00

First, thanks to everyone for guessing...that was fun and I'm a little sorry I didn't name Bea "Beatrice de Luna"...that's beautiful. But I know what you're here for so I'll get to it.

The 1st winner is Melissa for "I take back my previous comment-I think that the casserole dish is used as a cat feeding contraption." See, she's right. Tucker is a messy, messy eater and unless the food and water are contained, I'll find them pulled off into another room and dumped. This was the best solution I could find to contain his messiness.

Now, for Beatrice's middle name. Well, a kitten like this couldn't have just any old ordinary name, could she? It had to be special. Sooooo, congratulations to Bella for being the first to guess her name is Beatrice Ponce de Leon. :-)

I'm not sure how Margaret would prefer to discuss your choices with you or which emails y'all prefer to use (boy, I was well prepared with info, wasn't I? *eyeroll*) but y'all can figure it out since you know each other. Thanks again for playing!

It's time for a contest!

2010-07-19T14:03:00.001-04:00

And this contest is for a great cause! My sweet friend Margaret is doing something pretty special over at her Etsy shop, Little Heart Shaped Box. She's donating 100% of the proceeds from any sale to help the Bay Area Food Bank so I bought 3. I had her send one to me because I'm greedy like that and she's waiting for two of you to let her know which ones you want! So many people on the Gulf coast are being so horribly affected by this oil spill and they need help. Food banks are wonderful organizations in times of crisis and this one is no exception. Plus, I won't deny that Margaret's charms and magnets are adorable and I'm happy to spread the word about her shop for that reason, too!

Okay, okay, the contest...don't rush me. We're going to have two winners (or possibly just one if one person answers both questions correctly), and the winners can pick an item of their choice from Little Heart Shaped Box. Here's a picture I snitched off LHSB of a charm and really, how pretty is this? You can pick whatever you like, though, or magnets if you don't wear jewelry.

To give you an idea of the size, I took a picture of my own next to a quarter. See? Not too big, not too small and trust me, these are even prettier than they photograph!

So, what do you have to do to win one? Or both? I'm glad you asked. Remember this picture of Beatrice?

I said that there was actually a very good reason this happens often around here and that it's not just that I leave my bakeware out on the counter all the time. So, for the first win, tell me what you think the reason is that I have a casserole dish on my counter every day or two? Here's a cryptic hint - it's usually someplace else doing something else. I do not cook in this particular dish, I swear!

And for the second win, guess Beatrice's middle name. Yes, my cats have middle names, don't yours? Tucker John, Ginger Kaye, Gina Marie and Beatrice...what? You'll definitely need a clue for this one so I'll tell you it's also the name of a Spanish explorer. See? Easy!

Have fun and remember you can guess both and could possibly win both! If anyone is dumb enough to actually give a duplicate answer, well...too bad for you, you should have thought this out a little better. ;-)

PS: I forgot to mention that the contest will end this Wednesday, the 21st, at noon eastern time. That's sort of important. *nods*

How to cook like Bea and me.

2010-07-17T15:51:00.004-04:00

First off, what the hell is wrong with me? I drive-by post on my own blog and that's just sad, especially when I drive-by with a pity party like that last one was. Jeeeez.

In the interest of moving onward and upward and just being an all-around more pleasant person, I decided to cook something...interesting. But first off, this is Beatrice, also known as Bea, Bebe, Miss America and before she was spayed, Miss Antsy-Pantsy. Bea is a character...one of those cats full of personality and quirks. Many quirks. Lately, she has decided it is fun to cook with me since she gets tastes of good things like mayo and whipped cream. Mmmm, yeah, whatever. :-) This is where she was when I called her to the kitchen and she arranged those pillows herself, thankyouverymuch.

But enough about Miss Bea for now, since she's not what's for dinner. What is for dinner, you wonder? Oh, Baby, we've got something special! And don't mind the date...it's been in the freezer.

Oh, yeeeeeah, beef cheek! Now, I've never had cheek meat but Andrew Zimmern and Anthony Bourdain just rave about it so when I spotted this, I had to have it. Good price, too, They carry on about it being such a delicacy and their favorite bit of meat, so how can I go wrong, you wonder? Well, just you watch.

These were the ingredients for my initial plan, which was to treat it like a pot roast. We've got the onions, 'taters, carrots, celery and a rutabaga. I like adding rutabaga in with other root vegetables. It's such an underrated vegetable, but has such a nice taste and good texture. Try one, if you never have. Anyway, there's also some cheap red wine, garlic, salt, pepper and lavender, which is also a very underrated spice in stews and such. So, ingredients in place? Check.

Beatrice in place? Check. Yes, she's back in the casserole dish. There's really a very valid reason for this happening often but I'm not going to tell what it is. It's more fun letting people think I just randomly let my cats sleep in my cookware. But I know what you're really wanting to see...you want to see what that cheek looks like out of the package, don't you? Yeah, so did I.

There you go - all spread out and both sides of it. I'll admit that I was a bit disturbed here and I wasn't a bit bothered by the cow tongue or any other thing I've tried but this? Just really bothered me. I think it was because no matter how I arranged it, I could not figure out how it ever fit on a cow's face; I couldn't tell up from down or anything. However, that did not deter me.

I browned it and let it aside while chopping my vegetables. It looked better with some browning and I went back about this with some enthusiasm.

Trust me, always use a big knife when you cut up a rutabaga. Unless, of course, you have a thing for EMTs and/or abdominal wounds.

I browned up the celery, onions and garlic in butter, with a lot of salt and pepper. At this point, I realized there were only 3 onions in the pot but 4 had been out on the counter. I never did find that other onion. *scratches head* I began to wonder how long this meat should cook so I ran to look up a recipe online. I probably should have done that before, but hey, I found a recipe that sounded really good...so good, in fact, that plans changed.

These are the new seasonings - cocoa, cumin, a bit of cayenne and paprika. A Latin-flavored dish sounds good, doesn't it? Mmm hmmm.

Once in the pot, a last taste of the broth confirmed that this whole dish was going to be either really good or really bad. When in doubt about a dish, add some Maggi seasoning to it. For some reason, that fixes a lot. Then it went into a 325 degree oven for 3 hours. Now, I'm going to share something I probably shouldn't share, but what the hell. I never use my oven light and knew there was one small dirty spot in my oven, but no big deal. It happens to the best of us, right?

If you ever want to know what's *really* going on in your oven, take a picture of the inside using your flash. Yeah. I'm so ashamed. But, much like having herpes or something, sometimes you can make others with the same affliction feel better by being the first to admit it, so you're seeing my shame. And no, I don't have herpes; that was an example.

Time to make the cornbread! Hey, I like Jiffy Mix...so what? Did you know if you add 1/3 cup of sour cream to it while mixing it all up, it makes it really, really good? Yup, try it! Now, here's where you pretend 3 hours have passed.

Bea had some Doritos and ranch dressing, then went to take a nap in my recliner, wrapped up in her blankie. It was all so exhausting, what with the whole recipe change and all. I should have just joined her.

When it came out of the oven, I sorted it out into separate dishes and pretty much knew this wasn't going to be a rousingly successful meal. Sometimes, you can just tell by looking, even though it did smell nice. That cheek, once sliced? Was even shinier than it had been. And really, it was no wonder when you look closer. Please, enlarge it or you'll always wonder...

Look at the fat in that sucker! But, weirdly, this made me a bit hopeful. See, I'm that weird person who just loves the bites of fat on a roast or steak...so I tried a piece. Mmmmm, it was actually pretty good. Fatty, but good. Until I hit that cartilage or whatever it was. We fixed our plates and Jake managed to choke down about 3 bites before he actually gagged. It was the texture, "like eating a glob of fat on a sneaker sole", he said. I suggested he make himself a Hot Pocket and I ate mine. My whole serving. In fact, I was thinking that I'd maybe make it again, but using a very different recipe since the whole cocoa and cumin idea pretty well sucked. Not a great success but not a dismal failure.

Cut to about an hour later...I'm watching TV and get hit with a stomach cramp. I ignored it. I also ignored the next few, except for some Rolaids. What I could not ignore was the sudden need to teleport myself to the bathroom since running might not be fast enough. *sighs* And I spent most of the rest of the night performing this very activity, leaving me with a very clean and very well greased colon.

I will not be making beef cheek again and do not suggest you make it either, although it could be served to guests you don't like as long as they're going to have a very long ride home that night.

The end.

Saving love.

2010-07-02T03:38:00.004-04:00

Oh, I have sorely neglected this place, haven't I? Well, I just found an email from NaBloPoMo and it made me feel bad I've been such a poor blogger. I wish I could offer up exciting excuses, like that I've been held in a Cyprian jail cell for smuggling art or something, but alas! I just suck and am boring to even myself.

July is a bad month for me for many, many reasons. For the most part, though, it's because everyone I've loved the deepest has died in July. I hate July...passionately. As far as I'm concerned, this is the month of death and sadness. A child I loved beyond reason and words died in July. A father I loved fiercely and who was my other me died in July. A beautiful, kind man, one of the few truly good people in this world who I was honored to call my best friend, my brother, my family and a true love of a different kind, died in July.
I hate July.

But NaBloPoMo gave me a thump on the head and while I'm technically a day late, it's still July 1st in Hawaii or somewhere so, aloha and let's get on with it. The theme is "saved". I struggled over "saved" a bit and thought about sharing some of my packrat ways but found myself thinking instead of what I have saved in my heart from those I lost. Many things came to mind and it seemed right to share those, instead.

From the father, I have saved the lack of societal convention and acted on it in his honor. It's okay to be different. It's okay to embrace your "oddities" instead of fearing them or being scared of them. It's okay to be a loner. It's okay to laugh at yourself. It's okay to rebel. It's okay to be wrong, to apologize, to be a fallible human.

From the child, I have saved in my heart that it's okay to look different, to come from a different background, as long as you know it all comes from love. As long as you know you came from love, were created with love, and knew unconditional love, that gives you the strength to live and die with peace and knowing it is God's will.

From the best friend, I have saved in my heart that love can come in so many different forms and just because our society doesn't acknowledge them, they are no less valid. Real love is precious, rare, and brings many unexpected joys when not shunned just because it is different.

I have saved all the love I have been given from those who are gone. I have known true love, given true love, lost true love, mourned for true love in all of its forms. And I have saved all of it in my heart. I am beyond lucky to have that.

PS: I just saw that the writing prompt for the day is to tell what your favorite movie is. Well, mine would be either Billy Elliot or To Sir, with Love, followed closely by The Graduate.

Me and Thomas Dolby.

2010-04-26T03:08:00.003-04:00

I have so sorely neglected this poor blog, haven't I? When I'm online, I seem to stay busy either on Daisy or playing Farmville and now, Treasure Isle. I've also been making a lot of calls trying to drum up some help for our sweet queerple, Chris. He's on the level, totally legitimate, if you can help him. See? He's even had an article written about him. Caring for Chris is a family affair, cats included If we weren't both gay, I'd have a crush on Chris.

Anyway, as I was saying, this place has been all but abandoned, hasn't it? I keep taking pictures and then second-guess myself and begin to think no one would possibly care about that (whatever "that" was at the time). But it's 3am, we've got bad weather rolling through and I can't sleep when we have tornado warnings because we all know I can single-handedly ward one off or something. If I was (were?) smart, I'd go on to bed and just let it happen. I am not smart. I'm up, fully dressed and have appointed myself the weather alert of the neighborhood since we don't have sirens. You know what that means? It means that in the event of a tornado, I will either have a massive fail of my self-appointed duties and just grab Jake and throw his mattress over our heads or I will take myself very seriously and try running door to door, screeching, as a tornado bears down upon us. Either way, it's destined to not be my finest moment and by God, I'll own that.

So, here I sit. I started thinking about the rain and Jake's penchant for leaving his windows wide open at all times and I remembered he has work in the morning. As in 4 hours from now. Me? Up then? Doubtful. I know he's going to be groggy and will not remember those damn windows. His room is so bad, so hoarder-y, that I can't get to all his windows easily, so I started worrying about that and decided to leave him a note on the door he will go out, over the knob, so he can't possibly miss it. Back-story here, we always leave one another odd notes. Whatever crosses our minds, we write. So, I wrote the note, taped it up and then realized this could give y'all some insight to the funny stuff that goes on in this house. With no further ado...the note:

Below you can read it, complete with my own weird writing, offered up for posterity in green glitter gel pen ink. Oh, and yes, I'm iffy about that shiny brown paint, too. I don't want to discuss it.

Enjoy the insight into our lives. :-)

The last part of my "political" postings for now.

2010-04-11T04:27:00.003-04:00

So, we've had some interesting discussion here on political things, haven't we? I want to go off on a different tangent tonight, but will jump off something CK and, I believe, Corinne were saying about eduction being the key. I have to disagree. No amount of education is going to overcome peer pressure, parental influences and immediate societal influences, even over time. At least in my opinion. The DARE program proved this to us. Kids aren't going to take to being taught better values, personal responsibility and ambition when they don't see it among those they love and respect the most - family and friends. Oh, sure, you'll get the occasional success story but overall? It won't work. What will work, I think, is being tough on people. Fair, but tough. I'm going to lay out a plan I spoke of years ago and I still believe it will work. I'll enlarge on it now, based on today's circumstances.

So, my plan for rebuilding our country?

1. Announce a 5 year plan to eliminate all welfare programs, barring exceptions such as the terminally ill, mentally retarded, severely physically handicapped, etc. "Welfare" means food stamps, TANF, WIC, EITC, Section 8, SSI, etc. If you're on one of the plans already, you can continue on for your promised span but new children conceived after the start date get nothing. No medical, no WIC, noth-ing. Be responsible for what you do. So, this being the case, you better be prepared to do it on your own or face child neglect charges if you have kids and don't care for them after the 5 years is up. Those already on assistance have 5 years to figure out how to get off...go to college, go to tech school, whatever. Five years is a long time. It *can be done, even in this economy.

2. Loosen up domestic adoption costs and requirements. Of all things, *this is a good one for the government to actually run and make free for qualified people. Gays, "older" parents, single but well-established parents, parents who have an illness but are still able to parent? Let them adopt and let them adopt children of races other than their own. Kids will get good parents *and we'll make strides in diminishing still-existing color barriers. Win-win. You don't comply with #1? #2 kicks in.

3. Repeal the law that states you're a citizen simply by virtue of being born here but open up our borders to legal immigration via checkpoints like Ellis Island was. If you can come here legally by the new standards and work, pay taxes, support yourself and prove you can be a contributing, law-abiding citizen, we'll be proud to give you that citizenship and have you join us. In 5 years. Prove it for 5 years and you're an American, we'll make your ass legal. If you sneak in? We will assume you mean harm and seeing as how we're pretty easy under the new plan and we'll react accordingly. Think of our country as your literal new home...if you ring our doorbell and politely ask to come in, as long as you aren't the dangerous sort, we'll welcome you as family. We just ask that you cook and clean up after yourself and supply your own things...you're no guest, after all. But if you sneak in the window knowing how lenient the doorbell policy is, we reserve the right to shoot you in self defense.

4. Parents need to be held responsible for their kids until age 18. Period. No more of this "I can't control them....waaaah!" When you know you won't be held responsible it's too easy to put your head in the sand and your kids? Just laugh it off and know that as long as it's fairly small-time crime or misbehavior, not much will happen. That needs to change. Your kid under 18 does damage, gets in trouble, steals? You pay for it and out of your welfare, if necessary. If you have to sell a car, sell your house, perform community service, whatever...you made them, you pay for what they do wrong. If your kid doesn't care about the hurt this puts on your ass, you've screwed up somewhere in raising them and deserve it anyway.

5. This one will shock a few here to their core but I say require 2 years of mandatory public service of some type (the military would qualify) for every 18 year old (if they don't graduate, in which case a GED is required) or graduating senior unless they opt for college. If they graduate from college, the public service can come afterward and be in their chosen field, so that it will also count as work experience. Alternately, 4 years of half-time service would be acceptable since some will be immediately working in family businesses or whatnot. This country gives us a lot - we need to give back and not just by way of taxes.

6. Medical care. Life is rough and often not fair. Accept it. Health care being a "right"? I'm iffy but I'll give you that for the sake of argument. *Paid health care is a privilege, though. This new health care plan is a joke and, as I've said, will bankrupt us. Instead, let's put medical/nursing/pharmaceutical students who can't pay for their own education outright through school but require a year of service in their chosen field for every year this country covers for them in college. What then? So many towns have houses sitting empty, foreclosed upon. Same with whole apartment complexes. Even empty lots. Use whatever is available for housing for these brand-new medical professionals (think dorm or student apartment type housing) and have these new graduates live there rent-free, paying them minimum wage for their personal expenses. Build medical clinics close to said housing. Free/cheap clinics, where people can come and get basic medical care and even specialized care, at no cost if they can show they need it...unemployment papers, bank statements, utility statements, etc....or they can pay very affordable rates if they cannot prove the need for free services. If you choose to live beyond your means and spend money on things that could be put to insurance, too bad. You're out of luck and have to pay clinic rates for care. Look at that - you still win. Your kids, however, are not out of luck if you refuse and will be treated but it will be looked upon as child neglect by you since you chose the nicer home, newer cars, expensive cable package, etc. Child neglect is punishable by law. This will serve many purposes - providing health care for our citizens, forcing parents to be responsible, allowing our new medical professionals to gain more experience, and preventing the default of many students loans. It should also serve to help revitalize some run down areas as a side bonus.

7. Legalize drugs but enact far harsher penalties for crimes committed under the influence of drugs and alcohol. There are many, many benefits to this idea. For one, the price of street drugs will fall and crime will naturally fall with it. Big score. Let's relate it to health care, shall we? If you're sick due to substance abuse problems, you chose it. You pay for it. We have low cost clinics under my plan, remember? But employed or not, we aren't directly paying for your stupid decisions; you are an exception. You die from drug abuse? No great loss. Sorry. Self-inflicted illnesses? On you. Own yourself.

8. You'll notice I've been mentioning legalizing drugs a lot...yep, we should and all of them. Let those intent on using them do so...but have far stricter penalties than we do now if a crime results. Driving under the influence of something? We all know more people die from drugs than guns; therefore, attempted murder charges apply because you were intentionally "shooting" at people with your car, an object far larger than a bullet. Selling drugs? Attempted murder. Someone dies of an overdose and the supplier can be found? First degree murder. Using drugs, though? Simple possession? Ehhh, slap a dumbass label on their forehead. They'll either get over it or kill themselves off. Treatment for addiction, though? Out of pocket. You made the choice, you pay for it.

9. About the whole foreclosure situation? Here's a thought - if Mary bought a home for $500.000 and it's now in foreclosure, look at what Mary *can afford for a house payment. Can she afford a $250,000 home? No? How about a $100.000 home? Yes? Great. Take that $100,000 home that Joe owns in Mary's general area (or any home she prefers in a pool of similarly priced foreclosures) and that he can't pay for and *require Mary to step into it (or a similar one) and take over those payments. Instead of having a mass of foreclosures bringing our economy down, require people to honor their commitments to the lending institution but help them out of a bad situation by allowing them to downsize into something affordable with no penalty. Again, win-win.

10. Eliminate our federal income tax system and institute a percentage-based sales tax system instead. Say an additional 2% tacked on to what states and counties already charge, but for everything...food, drugs, services, etc. The income generated from this would be staggering yet fairly painless for everyone, even the poorest of people, and it would be the fairest system we could have. You don't like paying? Fine. Cut back on your spending. You are in control here over what you pay in federal taxes for the most part and everyone will pay a fair share, commensurate with income, for the services they receive from our government. The poor will naturally pay less than the wealthy, yet they will still contribute...as they should.

Trust me, I could go on and on but I'll stop here. I just felt that it was important to balance out all my complaining with fair and viable solutions to problems we are facing as a nation. If you can't offer alternative solutions, you have nothing. I'm curious what you think of mine...let me know.

And with this, I'll end my "political" posts. For the moment, anyway. Tomorrow (okay, today) will bring pictures and fun junk. If my lazy ass gets in gear, we might even get that new cooking post or something. It's after 4am and the hell with spell check or making sense. I'm posting as is, so deal with it and goodnight.

Happy Easter!

2010-04-04T02:05:00.001-04:00

I thought about trying to do a religious post, especially considering I'm one of Jesus' biggest non-Christian fans but in the end, I've got to tell you that I'm not buying this whole resurrection thing. Sorry. So, then I decided to show you old Easter pictures of me and Jake, only that seemed sort of boring. Then I got the bright idea to just upload and show you whatever is on my camera right now, no deletions. As I sat here doing this, I realized something sort of funny and took pictures of that, too. In the end, I decided to do it all and give you a photo-documentary of...something. Enjoy!

First picture off the camera is Beatrice in my recliner. She is, quite possibly, the funniest and quirkiest cat ever. So much so that I forgive her my scars.

In doing my Spring cleaning and digging into some hidey-holes, I found my old wedding rings and decided I best take a picture for insurance purposes. I've long wondered what I'd do with my engagement ring and have decided that if I ever have grandkids, I'll have that stone reset as a pendant for my first granddaughter who graduates from college. If I never have grandkids, it'll probably wind up on the 2060 version of craigslist. I'll be dead. I won't care. If nothing else they prove that this bit of utter sweetness below isn't a bastard.

That's my baby boy. It was taken on Easter night after a full first Easter of bunnies, cake and colored eggs that turned his tongue blue when he sucked on them. He had a busy and wonderful first Easter, my sweet Jacob did. And back then, he was Jacob. He only became Jake when he was about 12 and announced he preferred it. This is one of my favorite pictures of him, taken in old-fashioned black and white film. Ahhh, I look at that face and wish I could have some do-overs. Who knew that face would become this face below?

God, I miss his eyebrows. This is a picture I found on my camera, taken about 2 weeks ago. He thought I was trying to figure out how to put batteries in it, so he wasn't all posed. I do love that boy to distraction and his sweetness shows here. I'm so damn blessed to have him.

But when he poses, he's not so sweet. This was on my camera and taken after he got home from a photo shoot. He's been modeling for a local photographer and building a portfolio so he's used to striking a pose. Those boots? Christmas present from me. I still hate them.

Now for a total change of pace, here are the eggs in my fridge that will become deviled eggs tomorrow. I took this for my cousin who was having trouble grasping what I do. It's very simple, really. Boil your eggs and then roll them with force, cracking the shell into very fine bits but still remaining on the egg. Then soak them in dye (20 drops of food coloring, 1/4 cup of vinegar and 1 cup of water here) for at least 24 hours. The dye soaks in the cracks and when you peel them, you get a cool, colored cracked effect on the egg white itself. It makes pretty deviled eggs. While it's too late for Easter, do red and blue dyes for the 4th of July!

Now, I happened to notice the contents of my desk and got tickled at what I saw since it's *so me. I took pictures. I hope you find them as amusing as I do.

That's Gina. She'll be 17 in August and I can't stand her. She? Loves me. Whatever. I've got a prime spot picked out in the backyard for her. But take a look around...see my cell phone? My home phone? My vitamin and mineral stash? Nail implements? The Ruger .357 Magnum? Lol, what can I say? I'm cautious and prepared. I own it. Want to see the rest of my desk?

There's rum and Coke in that Hyundai mug. *nods* Got my bottle of grapefruit scented cleaner, my Xenu lamp, my router, an apple cinnamon candle and back scratcher. Seriously, who needs more than what I have here? Now, do you wonder what that print is on the wall? I would, if I were being all nosy and checking out someone's room like you are.

I love Paul Gauguin. He's my favorite artist. And there you have it...my random assortment of pictures.

Happy Easter to you all. To those I know, thank you for choosing to be in my life. I am truly honored and I don't say that lightly...you don't have to be here and I'm so glad you want to be. To those who might read this but haven't formally introduced yourself, the same applies. Thank you, and may the Easter Bunny be good to you all.

I hope you all looked as cool as I did at 6.
Me? Sunglasses? Still a thing. I grew out of the blonde weirdness but wish I still had those gloves.

Love, Lisa

I'm happy now.

2010-04-03T01:46:00.002-04:00

Doesn't it look better around here? More...me? Yeah, I think so, too. I played with making my own layout and got some stuff that was fine but not the feel I wanted. Somehow, I was thinking I wanted deep pink and tropical but in strolling around some sites, I spotted this and that was all she wrote. Now, it's not all settled in around here yet and you'll notice some tweaking going on for a bit. The pictures all need resized or something since they're too big for these columns but I dunno, since they're still viewable and clickable to enlarge, I might say "screw it" on those. I'm still trying to get my music playlist to show and still working on a button for oopsie daisy...i said that?. But overall? It reflects me and feels right again. What do you think?

Now, since I'm going to experiment with picture sizing, I'll leave you with this mugshot from my local paper. I have to tell you, I think she's pretty fugly in Florida, too.

Part 3: Probably not the turn you expected me to take.

2010-04-01T00:41:00.002-04:00

So, I know some who read that last post are thinking I've missed a huge set of numbers - the numbers this new plan is supposed to save us. Supposedly, it's going to actually help trim our deficit but we are given no valid details as to *how. All we have are some random numbers thrown out. Most people think it's going to help save the cost uninsured people bring upon hospitals, particularly by using the ER. Make no mistake, that figure is enormous and very, very expensive. Staggeringly so; however, I don't see how this plan is going to help. In the first place, just because it requires people to buy health insurance, that doesn't mean they *will. They may choose to pay the cheaper fine and continue using ERs as their main source of health care. They may simply not pay the fine at all, out of choice or out of being broke. Let's be real about a couple of things here...are we *really going to refuse someone medical care if they've not bought the insurance and failed to pay their fine? No. Are we really going to jail anyone for not paying their fine? Possibly, in the beginning. But we're going to need a hell of a lot more jails and people are going to get pretty pissed when the unemployed parents of 4 kids go to jail because they chose to give their folks $500 a month out of their unemployment so the family could live in Grandma's basement instead of buying health insurance with it. In the end, there's not going to be any real repercussions from not buying the insurance or failing to pay the fine. And that? Means not much will really change by way of saving money to counteract the cost of this bill. We'll still have the costs of Medicaid because in no way is this plan designed to eliminate Medicaid. Bluntly, not much will change for those most apt to use the ER as a primary health care facility and not much will change anywhere else, either. Status quo, but with trillions more taxpayer dollars going out. Again, I challenge you - but in a totally not mean way, I swear - to prove me wrong on this. Show me numbers, explain to me where I'm missing it. I can guarantee I'll keep an open mind because I'd really love to be wrong about this. All of this.

So, why would our President want such a plan if it seems doomed to failure? "That doesn't make sense so it can't be right", you think. Well, it won't fail at a few things...it's going to cause some health insurance providers to shut their doors. It's going to cause far more to up their rates to the point only the quite-well-off can afford them. It's going to cause some small businesses to go under, creating greater unemployment numbers. Why in the world would our President want all of this to happen, you wonder? There's an easy answer to that. The greater financial chaos we have, the more people will be turning to the government for financial support for survival. Medicaid, all welfare programs, educational grants, food stamps, assisted housing, etc. And why would our government want *this? Because the greatest way to have real control over the masses is to make them financially dependent upon the government. Economic slavery. Look back to the 60's. To civil rights fights. To desegregation. And a government packed up the ass full of older, rich, white men who feared the idea of a black man with some power. Uppity niggers. And how best to get those uppity niggers under control, the old, rich white men wondered? Limit federal funding for improvements to areas in which they lived in higher numbers, causing the areas to deteriorate and then give them money to survive on. Be their saviors to their faces and make them dependent upon the white man, the reality. And tell the world how bad they are so there's fear of them. Shocked to hear me say that? Don't be. See, it's all about numbers and control, once again my two favorite things to rail against. And now, our government is simply looking at it on a broader scale with this new bill. I've said before that I am a staunch Libertarian, yet I not only voted for Barack Obama, I actively campaigned for him. Why? Well, partly because I thought we needed a real change, cliche as that sounds. The other part of why I voted for him? He's black. Hey, I'll say the politically incorrect thing right on out loud. He scored bonus points with me for being biracial and identifying as black. I thought he would be a good bet for being offended at what our government has done to our black citizens in the past and would work to undo that dependency since it really has a major effect on our entire nation. I was wrong. He's nothing but a younger, darker version of those old white men from the 60's, only he's looking to control the lot of us this time, not just black people. Again, I'll say, and I ask you all to really give this some thought, that the greatest way to control people is to make them dependent. And we, as Americans, started out as stronger stuff than this. Back when we had that sense of independence, that sense of freedom and self-preservation, when we took care of ourselves and our own families, we did amazing things in this world, didn't we? Staggering, awe-inspiring things. It's what we were founded on, in fact. We were independent, we declared it and we were good, despite some tough and ugly ups and downs. You want to know why I hate this health care reform bill so much? It's the start of slavery in this country again, only this time not based on race but rather, based on socio-economic status.

Something to think about anyway, no?

Now, I'm not done because I just thought of something else for the next one. Lol...be glad you don't actually live with me.

Part 2: The dollars and sense of health care reform

2010-03-31T02:27:00.004-04:00

Now that we've played with numbers as far as people, let's go play on the fiscal playground, shall we? Our administration says that this health care reform bill will represent a savings to us over our current system because it will eliminate uninsured ER costs since everyone is going to be required to buy health insurance.

Here are the initial problems with this idea:

1) Poor people aren't going to be able to buy this or any insurance, nor can they pay the fines. So then what?
2) It means the taxpayers are going to still be picking up the cost of these people using ERs, just as they've always done. That, or we're going to be paying their premiums for the new health insurance. How much are premiums going to be per person? Gosh, we don't know, do we? We're being told they'll be affordable by a government who finds it affordable to give $100,000,000+ to Haiti alone while having borrowed $363,000,000,000 from China and $1,492,000,000,000 from Japan just to keep ourselves afloat. That $3.15 trillion deficit Obama projects? Please tell me how this all works? How is it smart, responsible, *feasible, to have when you look at the numbers? Let's relate it to something more easily...well, able to relate to. Let's say you have a neighbor who is $50,000 in credit card debit, home in peril since monthly payments are difficult, borrowing money from friends to pay those bills every month and then they decide a good move would be to trade in their '03 Blazer that they still owe on and that is expensive to drive on a '10 Prius because it'll be cheaper to run and better for the environment, even though the payments will be higher and will, in the end, still cost more. Forget HR 3200 and other bills...are you okay with *this? Answer honestly, at least in your head. You don't have to own it here.   If you answered yes, you're too stupid to read my blog or contribute to this conversation. Go away. The rest of you, please tell me the difference in this scenario and what we're looking at as a nation. Is it all about feel-good? Or am I missing something huge?

Let's look at some facts. I love facts as much as I hate "facts".

Here's a fact for you...we *must be prepared to cover all 305,000,000 people in the US under this plan. Not the numbers Obama has stated and that I'm too lazy to go look up since they make no sense. We must be prepared to cover every single person here under this plan. Why? Because they *are. They exist. But many have health insurance, you argue. Sure we do...I do. But this bill stipulates regulations such as no caps, no forbidding pre-existing conditions, etc. Here's another fact for you - we can only regulate insurance companies to the point they wish to be regulated. They, ultimately, have the final say in what happens to them, as they should. They will accept regulation until they don't feel like it anymore, and then they'll close up shop as we know it. Let's address a common misconception about insurance companies right now. They are not health care providers. They never have been and never will be. They are financial institutions, investment companies. Period. Our government, under many administrations and parties, has tried to lead us to believe otherwise but it simply isn't true. They do not give a shit about you personally, nor should they.   They are out to provide you with an investment that benefits both parties, period and end of subject. Think bank. Think mortgage company. Insurance, of all types, is the same. Do they give a rat's ass if you have cancer? Of course not. That's not their business and bravo to them for it. That's the business of your health care *providers, your doctors, nurses and such. Health insurance is an investment, nothing more or less. It's a bull market if you're sick and a bear market if you aren't. Insurance, all of it, is a financial institution and that's something people have lost sight of due to big, bad cases of the feel-goods. Take enough of their profit away and they *will leave. Florida and the Gulf Coast states found this out after our hurricanes...the states began saying what could and could not be done and the major, most solvent companies? Are gone or in the process of leaving. Add to that that every employer in this country is going to examine their bottom line and determine what benefits them most - paying partial premiums for their employees on the company plan or paying the fines. Believe me, the fines will benefit their bottom dollar most. Add into the mix the economy, growing unemployment and people like me who pay out of pocket for private plans and will absolutely stop if the government plan is cheaper and we've got a situation where we *must plan on insuring every single person in this country.

That little rant over, let's look at numbers.   For many years I've looked for a figure of what typical, as we know it know, health care would cost per capita if health insurance did not exist. Basically, if we all had unlimited money and saw doctors as we all wished, what would each person, child or adult, pay out of pocket at current rates for this care? For years I've low-balled and used the figure of $20,000 per person, knowing full well it's way too low. Lately, I've been I've been coming up with numbers that, averaged out, lead me to believe $80,000 is a closer (and still low) approximation. In my effort to low-ball and give the benefit of the doubt to the "other" side, I'm going to choose an average of the two, so $50,000 per person. If you find better numbers, please let me know in the comments. I will also gratefully recalculate if they turn out to be more accurate.

All that said and getting down to numbers, what it appears we need to be looking at is an annual figure of $15,250,000,000,000. Yes, over $15 TRILLION dollars and that's just for health care. That doesn't include the cost of building all of the additional, necessary hospitals and clinics. It doesn't include additional administrative costs.   Now, yes, I know that all of those will create jobs (some temporary, such as construction) and will alleviate some of the strain the high numbers of unemployment have caused but those were temporary numbers to begin with. Unemployment has a limited lifespan and public assistance programs will either still be used by the newly employed or their salaries will be high enough to not need PA, so either way, it's a tax-suck. Again, I'm going to low-ball numbers and leave the figure of $15 trillion as is. I'm going to simply ignore the cost of all the construction, education, staffing, liability insurance, etc. Gone. Poof.   How's that for fair beyond belief for the other side? So, it will fall upon the taxpayers to pick up this tab every. single. year. Think it can be done? Well, how many of our citizens are actually taxpayers? Oh, I know many think they are, even though they get back far more than they pay in. Newsflash, you're not a taxpayer if you qualify for EITC, WIC, Medicaid, CHIP, etc. Actual taxpayers make up less than 100 million people, or less than 1/3 of our citizens and that number grows smaller by the day with our economy still failing. So, how much extra will those 100 million people have to pay *each, to make sure others have health insurance under the health care reform bill? Well, we don't know their figures yet since they aren't telling us but I can tell you that using my figures, and remember how much I didn't even count, every actual taxpayer in this country will have to fork over an additional $150,000+ *annually* to fund this little adventure. Now, I don't know about you, but that's just not going to work for me.

Thoughts? Prayers? Want to tell me how and where I'm wrong? Because trust me, I hope I am.

PS: Please ignore typos...it's late and I'm just going to hit send.

Part 1: Let's talk health care reform.

2010-03-28T13:34:00.001-04:00

Leave your guns at the door - thanks!

So, let's talk about this whole health care reform mess, shall we? I'm going to wind up doing a series of posts on this, I'm realizing, and I just know that excites people to no end. Me, rambling on about health care? I know, I know. It makes my butt twist, too. But please jump in; I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts on it all and if we're lucky, maybe we have have a heated deba...uh, pleasant discussion about the topic. All I ask, for God's sake, is to be logical about it, please. I'd really love to hear everyone's opinions and thoughts but spare me the violins because they don't pay the bills. Saying "everyone should have the right to good health care" doesn't make it doable, nor is it logical and what we all need to remember is that our government is a business. There's no place for feelings and emotions and blue-birdy good wishes unless there's money to back those up. I mean, everyone should have the right to world peace too, but just wanting it doesn't make it a *right, nor does it make it possible. Access to health care is all well and fine but health *coverage is no right. That said, I really have no problem with Socialism, if that's roughly how a country was founded or what it grew into as it became modernized and civilized. However, Socialism, which is what *any national health care plan is based in, cannot be instituted successfully in place of another preexisting system that works. And make no mistake, our health care system *does work. Does it need some work? Absolutely. Reform, even? Yep. But you have to start in the right place and work in the right direction to achieve that and this plan? Doesn't.

So, let's get down to the nitty-gritty here. Numbers. Money. Figures the government is feeding us and the reality of those, all of which I can and will prove to the best of my ability. If you can show reliable sources proving any of them wrong or giving me more information than I could find, please do so! I'll happily revise the numbers and we'll see what we come up with then. Also, I am going to round up or down for ease in my own mental mathematical process, but for the sake of being fair I will never round in favor of my own argument and when making estimates, I will lowball in favor of the "other side" to the point of pain. That said, since I am going to run with this sans calculator, I may fuck it up. Please point out any errors.

Basic, indisputable facts we are going to work with:
The US population is around 305,000,000 and that includes illegal immigrants and legal non-citizens.

12,000,000 of those are illegal immigrants.

75,000,000 are children.

To briefly address illegal aliens and the healthcare reform bill, President Obama (and Nancy Pelosi) have clearly stated it would not cover illegal aliens. However, there is nothing in place in this bill to require people to show proof of legal status prior to obtaining services. So, take that as you will...I think we all know what the reality will be but I'll go with our President's words and, using the figures above, state that this means we have 298,000,000 prospective insurees we need to be concerned about under HR 3200.

More "facts" and facts:

A "fact": There are 46,000,000 uninsured people in the US, roughly 14% of our population, per government stats.

The real facts? 12,000,000 are illegal immigrants and they are included in that figure. We need to remove them...they are not entitled to health care in our country and even President Obama seems to agree with that. See above.

Another fact? Over 15,000,000 of those *individuals (not couples, mind you) have an income of over $50,000 per year. Know what that means? It means that many of them *could be paying for health insurance, at least a good major medical policy, for themselves and are choosing not to. Now, granted, I know that a single $50K income won't even allow one person to live decently in a few parts of the country but in the vast majority, it will. Here's the trouble...people have different ideas of "living decently". I learned way too much about this in the years I sold insurance and I never did get used to approaching someone about their health insurance, only to be told they "can't afford it". As they would tell me this, I'd have a policy on their home in a somewhat upscale neighborhood on one screen and the policies on their 2 newish cars on the other. These people made a lifestyle choice the precluding them affording health insurance; it's not that they couldn't afford it. It was not a priority for them and while I fully admit I cannot show stats on that fact, I think the numbers of people in this category would shock most everyone. The funny thing is, in their minds they're telling the God's honest truth when they say that can't afford it. We live in such an entitled society that our citizens have come to accept what once were considered benefits of many years of hard work and saving to be normal and simply "decent". Anyway, I'll stop that mini-rant and let's put some numbers on this. So, what percentage of people in the over $50K per year income range could afford health insurance and are choosing not to? Frankly, I believe firmly that 75% of the fall into this category since not all of them are single or married with this being their only family income. But, I said I'd lowball numbers when it doubt and I will. Let's go with 33% or 5,000,000.

Our last fact? Another 13,000,000 were eligible for Medicaid or Medicare and, for whatever reason, chose to not enroll in them. Again, they have chose to be uninsured and we *cannot rightfully include them in these figures if they made that choice. At least I do not believe so.

So, what is our revised, more accurate body count, pardon my pun, of US citizens who are uninsured and not out of choice? 16,000,0000. Now, 7,000,000 of those uninsured are children. Why? Between Medicaid and CHIP , there's no reason for any child to be without insurance in this country and if they are, it's out of choice. Their parents have chosen for it to not be a priority. We cannot count them in the number of uninsured, either. At least I don't think so. I mean, we can't rightfully say we need to cover people who have chosen to not cover themselves and their families...can we? Yeah, I didn't think so. Nonetheless, I'll give you 2,000,000 kids who may have unusual situations in their family lives that really can't be helped.

So, what's our final count of US citizens who are uninsured *not* by choice? You know, the ones that really do need help? 11,000,000 people. Not 46,000,000. And this means the percentage of Americans uninsured not out of choice is actually just under 4%, not even close to 14% of our population, as our government likes to state. I'll leave you to digest this while I go have a nap and tend the chickens. If I had chickens. So, is our system broken? Or are our citizens and their values broken? You tell me and we'll take it from there.

My life. My blog. My nerves.

2010-03-27T02:54:00.001-04:00

Once again, I've been missing in action. I have all these thoughts, ideas and pictures yet every tome I've opened my blog I just click it off. Why? I hate how it looks. I mean, I *really hate it. I know it sounds stupid but I'm a very sensory-driven person. I'm not terribly driven or affected by raw emotion - it annoys me, actually - but I respond emotionally to visual things, scents, the feel of items. And I *hate* how my blog looks. That said, it's going to be changing. If nothing else, I'll put it back as it was but I know exactly what I want in my head and since I can't find it, I'll have to learn to make it. *dusts off the old HTML skills*

Moving along to other topics, I've got a new cooking post in the works, as well as a detailed post on why the new health care reform bill can't work. That's a topic I've decided to try to keep off Daisy, since I think I tend to offend people and, sadly, many people won't defend their opinions. They just get very quiet and pissy, which makes for dreadful silence and I feel like a bull in a china shop. I don't get it...it you believe in something, stand up for it and do it logically. If you can't logically defend or explain it, maybe you need to wonder why that is. Anyway, I have all this stuff in my head and no place I like to put it so some work around here is in order this weekend.

Also in the works are some pictures of the outside of my house. Overall, it's okay-looking for what it is and we're in the midst of repainting it the same color I had it painted 7 years ago - khaki with white trim. I still like it, especially since I have red brick accents, but it takes a beating in our weather so it's faded and tired now. it will look fresh with the repainting but since it's pushing 50 now, it's got a few weird issues with prominent wires and such I could use some ideas on disguising. I also have the backyard from hell coupled with the neighbor from hell who shares a common back fence with me and I need ideas on that, too. See, I told you...I have all this stuff in my head. I'm gonna burst. ;-)

Let's see...what else? Well, for the first time in my adult life, I'm sick of cats. Seriously. All four are having issues and I've cleaned up more cat shit, vomit, gunk and piss in the last 48 hours than I have in all of my cat-owning years combined. At least it surely does feel like it. I feel like I've done nothing but clean up nastiness and still have it feel nasty and I'm so over it, I can't tell you. I'm tired to death of scooping, spraying, scrubbing, rubbing, laundering and mopping up after fucking cats. I don't know how people cope when they have multiple children who are sick because I know I could cheerfully bash a couple of cats over the head with my remote and that's kind of frowned upon with children.

My son just shaved his eyebrows off for a photo shoot. He now looks like a freaking meth-head. I'm so proud...only not. I'm just sarcastic and aggravated. My God, I'm having flashbacks to my mom and her "what will the neighbors think?" days.

Anyway, that's my life. Fun times.
Don't give up on me, though...I'll get this mess of a place sorted out and be back!

"Hello, is this God?"

2010-03-07T15:59:00.011-05:00

Some of you know but for those who don't, Jake's laptop was stolen night before last. Now, it was his fault in that he was careless - he took it to a friend's (parental) home to record some little garage band they had playing and when he left, he forgot his laptop there. He realized as soon as he walked in our door and I offered to take him back but he didn't want to disturb them. Seems their folks had shooed everyone off so they could go to bed and he said it would be fine there in their home until morning. I had a bad feeling, but okay, his choice. The next morning he texts his friend that we're going to swing by and pick up the laptop and sure enough...it's gone. I was sick about it and Jake even more so. For one, this was a very nice, specially modded laptop but worse, it had most of Jake's music and photos on it. He texts that we're going to come over anyway so he can look for it himself. We get there. They are all gone...that or not answering the door. Jake calls the cops, who take it far more seriously than I'd expected. The homeowners do finally show up and once our part was done, we leave. It's obvious the cop who remains is not finished with them and we leave feeling fairly certain someone in that house knows *exactly where that laptop is. For the record, I don't think it was Jake's friend. So, we come home and we're both pretty sick over all this, plus I'm trying to figure out what to do since I really don't think his carelessness should be rewarded with a brand new laptop and, at the same time, I'm thinking you really ought to be able to leave something in a friend's home, especially with parents there, and expect it to be okay. Anyway, we tell my mom, who is *very upset both for the material loss but for the loss of all of Jake's hard work. I mean, Miss Arse is in tears upset. She's old, they get emotional.

So, this morning Miss Arse calls around 11 and asks if we've heard any news. I tell her no. The rest of the conversation went like this, with her in italics:

"I'm disappointed. Now, don't you dare make fun of me, but last night I literally got down on my knees and prayed to God to consider what a good son and grandson Jake is and asked him to please consider getting that laptop back to Jake if he felt Jake was worthy of it and had learned a lesson."

*trying to not giggle because she was so darn serious*
"That was sweet, Mom, thank you. But you probably ought to be praying for world peace or food for starving children, don't you think?"

"Ohhh, probably, but in the end I really don't give a shit about those things over my grandson being happy."

"Well, while I appreciate that, I'm not so sure God will."

"I'm not so sure He won't!"

"Apparently He doesn't since we don't have the laptop back."

At this point Jake walks out into the room and says (loud enough she can hear him), "Mom!!! (Friend) just texted me and he's got my laptop! He said his dad went searching out in the woods this morning and found it!"

"See. *smug tone* I told you I thought God would think that laptop was important."

At that point, why argue? She is one happy old lady today with a renewed sense of God and Jesus in her life, and pretty damn confident God listened to her. That's all that matters. Jake and I? Have a renewed faith that we've got at least one bad-ass deputy in this county who put some pressure on that family and that the dad knew *exactly where that laptop was the whole time. But hey, maybe God sent us that particular deputy...

Either way, we've got the laptop back, a bit scratched up but fine and Miss Arse is convinced she's now got a personal pipeline to God. It's a good day for us all. :-)

A sweet surprise from a sweet friend!

2010-03-05T01:12:00.003-05:00

Awhile back, my friend Kristin, knowing how I love smell-good things, asked for my address. Her sister sells Scentsy and she said she had some odds and ends she didn't care for that she would send me so I could try Scentsy products out. Now, I'm none too proud when it comes to these things and was thrilled to get her oddsy-endsy stuff so I happily forked over my address. Imagine my surprise when I get *this box in the mail today....not from Kristin but from Scentsy itself.

I ripped open the box with a pathetic amount of excitement and found something that really did touch me very much. Kristin had actually taken the time, it now turns out, to ask a mutual friend, Robin what scents I'd like and ordered me some she knew I'd really enjoy! To beat all, she also got me a plug-in tart warmer, something I've wanted so badly and just never justified getting for myself. Here's my haul - the cute as hell warmer still in the box, 3 *wonderful smelling tart packs and a scented tin that is already in my car!

She even managed to get me the one scent I've been most intrigued by! It did not disappoint; I want to roll my naked body in this scent. Oh, it's that good.

It took me all of about 3 minutes to get a chunk of it in my cute as hell plug-in warmer and I? Am a very happy woman. I've long wanted a warmer for my kitchen but counter space is limited and this is beyond perfect. Plus, despite my bad photography skills, you can see how it also acts as a nightlight...so darn pretty!

Kristin, I know I've already thanked you by email but I wanted to do so here, again. This was one of the nicest, sweetest things anyone has done for me "just because" in a very long time and it's appreciated more than you know. I'm very lucky. Thanks for being such a dear friend and caring enough to do this for me - it means more than I can say and Robin, thank you, too, for knowing what I like well enough to help her out with her big plan. :-)

Lastly, since I can now vouch for Scentsy products, Kristin's sister is having free shipping on her Scentsy site. Seriously, free shipping? Now's the time to try this stuff if you've been wondering about it. I think you have to send her an email with your order but the link to her email is on her site. Just email her and she'll lead you through it. And these plug-in warmers for small spaces? Oh, yeah. Trust me. You need them!

How to cook like me - the sequel.

2010-02-24T10:16:00.004-05:00

Some of you may remember my first cooking expedition for this blog. I made my version of chicken curry and a few were pretty freaked out over a piece of stewed okra that I poked apart. Well, hang on 'cause you ain't see nothing yet!.

Backstory - once a week or so, I hunt down some food item we've never tried before and we incorporate it into dinner. For the most part, we like whatever it is and it gets filed away in my brain to use again someday. This week, I stumbled across a lot of cow tongues and cheeks. I've never had either and I knew Jake hadn't so I texted him to pick. He went for broke and chose the tongue. I picked one that looked good, considering I'd never seen them in person before, and headed home with it. What follows is our first experience with cow tongue. Enjoy!

So, there it is...all laid out with part of what I planned on cooking it with. I wonder if our cow was a black and white cow or if all cow tongues are spotty. Anyone know? My plan was to cook it slowly as I would a beef stew or pot roast so I found some potatoes that needed used (note the eyes) and some carrots that actually still looked pretty good. I had to get the onion from my mom. It turns out that I was somewhat ill-prepared for this adventure but I didn't let that stop me.

Look, it has taste buds! These big ones are to the back of the tongue and on people, those pick up bitter flavors. I wonder if it's the same on a cow? I also wondered if this was an old cow since old people's taste buds get bigger with age. No matter. It's cool to look at and more cool to touch.

I know what you're wondering. I wondered what it looked like underneath, too. It looks like this. Yes, I know it looks vaguely penis-y. And yes, I know that's ironic since it's a tongue. I know the rest of the irony, too...lol...let's keep going.

I just grabbed some spices that appealed to me in the moment since I'm a spontaneous kind of girl when it comes to cooking. I wound up using a lot of powdered beef boullion, Maggi seasoning, red pepper flakes, a couple of bay leafs, herbs de provence (such an underrated seasoning), black pepper and paprika. Since I'm a sucky photographer, that's sea salt in the Blue Willow bowl in the front. In addition to all this, I added 5 cloves of chopped garlic. I thought I spiced heavily. Trust me, go overboard. The end result was a tad bland and next time I will double what I thought was right.

I also made a last minute change and used these instead of the whole onion. Don't do this. They have very little onion flavor and I wish I'd stuck with quartering that whole onion.

When it all went into the pot, it looked like this and I covered it. No problem, right?

Two hours into the four hours of simmering, I found this. It...expanded. And got very firm. Yes, much like *that. Hush and stop giggling.

At the end of 4 hours, I got it out and took a good look at it. You can, too. I know you're giggling again and I'm looking at what appear to be three pustules. If it was...well...you know. But it isn't. It's a cow tongue and water got under the skin, that's all!

The skin came off quite easily, as you can see here. That was a pleasant surprise.

And here we have it...my dinner, including the sliced tongue. The verdict is that it was very good! The texture was a tiny bit bothersome for the first bite or two (chew on your own tongue - it's that, but a bit firmer) but the taste was very much like the best roast beef you've ever had. Good taste, good price at $2.69 a pound and I'd say tongue will be making the occasional appearance at our house in the future. Plus, there's an extra fun bonus - you can decorate with it. Who knew?

This skin I peeled off? Tell me you couldn't dry that and frame it, then sell it in some high-end shop as "Old West" decor.

You're welcome. :-D

Just not happy.

2010-02-16T01:09:00.000-05:00

First off, I'm not happy with the new look of my blog and because I'm not, I never finished the redecorating. It's not "me". I mean it almost is but just isn't and I just don't like it. It's caused me to lose some enthusiasm about this place. I need to work on that. People might miss me...all 3 of them.

My second not happy thing is that I've lost the cord to upload pictures from my phone. I had it. I'm a neat and organized person. Why can't I find this cord?

My third not happy thing is that in cleaning the litterboxes tonight, I found blood. Three out of four of my cats use this one so how the hell am I supposed to know who has an issue? I guess I'll be listening for covering noises and then running to check cat shit for the next few days. Lovely.

My fourth not happy thing is that I'm about to have to get really ugly with the condition of Jake's bedroom and I hate, hate, hate getting ugly with people I love. It truly looks like something you'd see on Hoarders and I? Am the one who strips closets out every few months and lists shit on craigslist. I've bitched, I've whined, I've been logical, I've even cried. I'm about to put a "one week or I will clean it myself and throw shit out mercilessly" ultimatum on it, something I hate to do for many reasons. To beat all, this is the same son who volunteers to vacuum and mop the whole house, unloads the dishwasher on a word and cleans the bathroom on a hint, then asks what else he can do. I just don't get it.

My fifth not happy thing is that I understand there is a lot of turmoil among people I like, in a place I used to be a member of. I hate that for many reasons. Again, I will say that anyone is free and most welcome to join in with us over on Oopsie daisy...I said that? I don't care where else a person posts or visits...it's not my business and there's not a reason in the world a person can't take part in the conversations at multiple places, if they wish. It's an open blog with interesting, caring people...jump in!

Hopefully tomorrow will bring about a list of happier things. Right now? I think I might just aim for 5 things that I want to bitch about for the sheer fun of it. :-D

Sometimes kids aren't too bad.

2010-02-08T02:32:00.000-05:00

I decided to hit Walmart during the Superbowl, figuring it might not be so crowded. It wasn't but man alive, I've never seen so many couple sniping and bickering at one another. I wondered if maybe it's because half of them wanted to be home watching the game but yikes, it was ugly. Even the employees were bitchy, which is unusual for my Walmart. Anyway, I was standing out by my car, putting my groceries and unnecessary crap in the trunk when I noticed there was a family doing the same at the car next to me and their daughter, who looked to be about 7, was watching me. We caught eyes and I smiled at her because I felt like I had to do something or it would have been sort of rude. She smiled back and the following conversation ensued:

Her: "You look like a really nice lady."
Me (taken aback but very amused): "Well, thanks, I do try. You look like a really nice girl, too."
Her (very seriously): "Thank you. I try, too."
:::pause:::
Her: It's really hard sometimes, isn't it?
Me (trying to not piss myself): "Yes, it sure is, but all we can do is keep trying."
Her, nodding as she got in the car: "Well, good luck with that! 'Bye!"

Her dad was mouthing "I'm sorry" over the top of her head and as she got in the car, I whispered to him that he did not need to apologize, that it was the nicest thing that had happened to me all day. And it was. Maybe even all week. :-)

Excuse my mess.

2010-02-05T20:48:00.001-05:00

I'm still redecorating around here and I'm not entirely sure I like this new look, so things may be changing again soon. It's usable, though. If you have any suggestions, please feel free to share...something just isn't right with it all. Hmmm...maybe it's because I really wanted pink. Yes, pink.

While I work around here, I've got something else to share with y'all. Remember I said I had a little something up my sleeve? Well, here it is. Grab a drink or three and cut loose! Oopsie daisy...I said that?

PS: I have tons of email to catch up but it's all saved. Don't give up on me if you've emailed and I've not gotten back to you yet - I will!

Oddsy-endsy stuff.

2010-02-05T00:14:00.003-05:00

The first thing I want to do is to say I've loved seeing some faces pop up here that I'd hate losing touch with. That's made me smile more than a few times and it's very much appreciated. A few don't have blogs and I don't have your emails so, please, please feel free to email me at anemonepie at yahoo dot com and keep in touch, if you'd like...any of you.

Next thing? I'm going to revamp this place and so some odd shit might be going on for the next few days. I might even make it private for a day or two but it won't be for more than that. I'm just tired of how it looks, have some dead links that need cleaned up and hell, I just want to redecorate. I figured I'd give a warning, though. I might even have something else up my sleeve... ;-)

Lastly, I was cleaning out some photos on the computer bit ago and found this one. I took it at Christmas and the pictures you see there? I did in high school. Now, I'm no artistic genius but I figured I'd show them so that when I say I consider myself to be an artist, y'all know I have a little something to back it up with.

The one to the left was my first attempt at using pastels. It's unfinished, but I sort of like it that way. The one to the right is Johnny Rotten. Yes, I have Johnny Rotten on my dining room wall because that's how I roll. *chuckles* That one is done in pen and ink and all in dots. Nothing but dots. There's not a solid line to be found. All those times I've said I can be anal? Take me seriously. And is it making me nuts that I see they are hanging crooked? Why, yes, yes it is. Please ignore that.

Alrighty, everyone, have a lovely Friday and be safe. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!

On to happier things...shopping!

2010-02-04T01:19:00.003-05:00

When one of us is in crabby mood, we both find solace in having a "let's go buy junk" spree. We'd not done it in maybe a year so yesterday was the perfect day. It involves picking a fun store, usually one that involves food, and basically buying anything we want within a reasonable limit, then eating at a fun place...yesterday was CiCi's Pizza. So, we chose a place we'd never been to shop, World Market. I have a new favorite store. It isn't a big place, at least the one closest to us isn't, but I think I loved every single aisle and every item on every single aisle. Jake wasn't far behind me in that. The rule was, dump anything you want into the cart and then we'll stop and reassess each item at the end. Two hours later, a few things went back on the shelf and $75 later, this is what we came home with.

Oh, my...there are bruschetta and spicy Thai chips, Ramune and assorted Japanese candies and snacks for Jake, tins of my beloved ginger Altoids for me, a big bottle of sweet chili sauce, gnocchi, a bottle of key lime seasoning I'm anxious to try on fish, two tins of pate' (lobster and salmon) that we thought would be fun to try (we had the lobster one with crackers and boiled eggs for lunch...yum!), some assorted Indian spice mixes, a couple of bars of lime and basil scented soap and, most importantly for me? New perfume.

I love it. I mean I really sort of lust-for-it love it...it smells like jasmine incense. Mmmm! I'm a perfume whore but the last one I had this kind of strong reaction to was Jennifer Lopez' Miami Glow, which is basically Beach In A Bottle. Years later, I still wear it and I could just roll in this Indian Champa scent, it's so me. At $15 for a 1.6 ounce bottle, I made a major score. Other major scores include our chocolate find. Now, I'm not a sweet or candy eater but I love dark chocolate once in awhile. We came home with these and my choices were the Chili & Lime Dark Chocolate and the one with sea salt. The Chili & Lime one is now gone, with me eating 3/4 of it and Jake grudgingly getting the other 1/4. It was, hands down, the most amazing candy I've ever had. Dark, slightly bitter chocolate, sweet but bitter lime and the heat of chili to linger...perfect stuff. Candy cannot possibly get better than this.

On a cute note, it was a chilly and rainy day so I threw some soft things and quilts out for the cats before we left. When we came home, we found a rare occurrence - all four cats tolerating one another on one piece of furniture.

Bottom left to right is not quite 2 year old Tucker, the only boy and the little feral guy who saved us from the space heater disaster. Curled together are my old ladies, litter sisters, who will be 17 in August, Gina and Ginger. Up top is the queen of the house, almost 5 year old Beatrice, the casserole cat. I love 'em...lots. But, I love my kid more. He got to feeling headachy as the night went on and I was dozing in my recliner after Lost. When I woke up I found this in my bed because it seems that even when you're 18, if you don't feel good, you want to sleep in your mom's bed.

I love him more than all the perfume, chocolate, Altoids and cats, combined and multiplied a million times over. It's a good thing I have a comfortable recliner and oh, yeah, that's my bedroom. Wooo. :-)

I hate repeating myself.

2010-02-02T23:19:00.001-05:00

But I will, since I'm hearing my comments were deleted from SIP. Color me shocked.
Below is what I posted, spelling errors and all:

So, here we go folks...

I got out, went shopping, bought junk and new perfume to clear my head and calm my mouth and now I'm going to share some things.

This morning, I went to read Kristin's blog and she had an email posted. It was Kristin's only to Wendy and *not* Wendy's, that she has posted in...hurt? Anger? Confusion? I had a hunch and snagged that post in a c&p. Almost immediately, it was gone so I assumed she thought better of it and got rid of the post. Perhaps someone else saw it, too? In any event, it was obvious from her response to Wendy what the situation was and that she was trying very hard to explain her friendship with Tee off the blog. She was polite to Wendy, asking for answers as to why this happened and not understanding. She absolutely did tell Wendy that she doesn't appreciate a few of the rules, such as no announcing someone has mail, but the gist of it was confusion, sadness and wanting to know why. In fairness, based on Kristin's tone, it appears Wendy was in no way being ugly to her but was refusing to explain and Kristin was trying to understand and getting frustrated but everything appeared (to me, anyway) to be polite enough on both ends, everything consdiered. Also, the number of people complaining was two, re: Kristin's words to Wendy and I'm assuming there she echoed what she was told. I will tell you all that I've talked to Kristin, she knows what I saw and I asked her permission to post what I c&p from there here. She prefers I not and would not share Wendy's email (I asked) out of respect for Wendy's privacy but gave me permission to tell this much since I saw it and have it, so it's pretty much mine to tell anyway. I have no idea what Wendy's underlying issue with Kristin is, but let me assure you all that whatever it is, there was no big drama. That much was terribly clear. It centered solely on the fact Kristin was talking to Tee off the blog and, imo, not liking the fact Kristin speaks her mind about the "rules" she didn't like. Period. If some of you choose to not believe what I'm saying here, that's fine...your prerogative. I have no reason to lie about it, though. Wendy does appear to have chosen to remove Kristin on the basis this and of one, maybe two people who also complained about something unknown. Maybe.

As for blocking her IP? Why? That's ridiculous and frankly, weird as hell and paranoid. Wouldn't a far more logical answer not be that she either wasn't on the blog at all, or, if she was posting, she was using a different computer at work that had a block on it? Why in the world would any sane person immediately assume someone had their IP address blocked just because they couldn't be seen anymore? Right. They wouldn't. I will also own that I feel sort of icky knowing we're being monitored here now.

That all said, I understand clearly and somewhat painfully now that not a one of us are safe from what happened to Kristin today unless we fall into line like good little soldiers and don't rock Wendy's boat. And I? Don't sail that way. Sorry. This will be my last post here and I do regret that because I've come to truly think the world of so any of you and will miss you sorely. I am, however, so deeply offended and angry by what happened to Kristin today and am positive I'm right because I saw enough "proof" that I'm not going to be hypocritical enough to stick around Wendy's place here pretending it's all fine, hoping I act right, speak right and don't wake up one morning cut off. I'd rather go out being able to say goodbye to you all.

If anyone wants to keep in touch, you know where I am and I'm sure I'll be pestering some of you with hellos, as well. Take care, all of you. This is hard to send but I'm so uncomfortable here now that really, there's no choice. I will miss so many.

~Lisa

PS: Feel free to comment freely but on this one, I won't be responding. I simply see no need. It's just a repost, nothing more.

For Bella...

2010-02-01T23:56:00.001-05:00

...because Bella shares my love of the quirkiness old Florida neighborhoods have. :-)

This was taken the other morning from my carport. I had to sneak and I took it with my cell phone, then blew it up, so please accept my apologies for the quality but enjoy, for this is what I see every morning out my kitchen window!

Tim Tebow.

2010-01-27T02:44:00.004-05:00

First off, let me say I'm not a football fan. Not even a little bit. I've never understood the fascination with it all but hey, to each their own. That said, living in central Flaaaaahda, I know who Tim Tebow is because, you know, he's Flaaaaahda's next thing to Jesus. While I'd personally not go that far, he seems like a decent enough guy and that's sort of a refreshing change from some we hear about in sports.

I'm sure most everyone has heard of the whole controversy about Tim's Superbowl ad and I admit, I'm fascinated by it all. If you aren't familiar with the story, here you go.

Here are my thoughts on the whole thing...do you agree? Disagree? I'm nosy.
1. Any person and any organization, no exceptions, should be allowed to request the purchase of airtime on any network.

2. That network should be allowed to decide what they want to run as long as it fits into FCC requirements. After all, it's their network.

3. Who cares? I mean, seriously, if you're pro-choice, do you really consider Tim Tebow to be a threat? Do you have no higher opinion of our female population's decision-making skills than this? Do you really think he's going to sway women into choosing not to abort, simply because he's Tim Tebow? And if some do chose to (not) do so after seeing his ad, what's the problem? Isn't lowering abortion rates a good thing on both sides, in general? It's not exactly something anyone wants to encourage, is it?

4. Anyone and I mean *any reasonable person who would be swayed in such an important, personal opinion by a TV ad featuring a college football player probably isn't someone with an intelligence level either side of the debate wants to claim. God can't sway you, values and beliefs your folks taught you didn't phase you, your own intelligence and common sense didn't cause you to know how you feel about it all, but Tim Tebow can make a difference in how you feel about abortion? Yeaaaaaah, you ought not be breeding anyway so if you do, consider adoption.

I say that commercial should air and good for Tim for having the conviction to say how he feels so publically. That *is setting a good example - own your beliefs, whatever they may be. I'll watch the ad and cheer Tim on. I have no issues in the world with it. Hey, it's a better example for our kids of how to stand up for our beliefs, whatever they may be, than another godaddy.com ad.

Oh, and I'm pro-choice...vehemently so. Go figure.

"I Ran" by A Flock Of Seagulls.

2010-01-21T02:08:00.000-05:00

The minute I signed up for that nablopomo.com thing, I shut down. I had nothing to say. I avoided my blog. It became a relationship and I fought the urge for a bit, but then I ran away. So, I own it...I don't do commitments well. Okay? See the title up there? It's also the ringtone on my phone.

And I ran, I ran so far away
I just ran, I ran all night and day
I couldn't get away

I'm back. Break out the mashed potatoes and rum, let's all settle back into our recliners and see what happens.

Bad news: My washer has been leaking like a sieve for the last 2 weeks.
Good news: I figured out if I use cold water only, it doesn't leak. That means it's a simple fix of the hot water hose.
Bad news: $1 says I'm still using only cold water a year from now.

Bad news: All my Christmas stuff is still up.
Good news: I'm not the only one on my street.
Bad news: I still have to take it down.

Bad news: A good friend's 90+ year old father is "non-responsive" (doesn't that mean comatose??) from kidney failure and a possible massive stroke.
Good news: He's old and has Alzheimer's. Whatever happens, he won't remember it.
Bad news: She asked me to pray that it's "only kidney failure, since that is fixable". Uh, jeeeeez, trying to prolong the agony for the poor old guy as long as you can? No, thanks. I'll pray he finds peace. It's the best I can do.

Bad news: My house stinks.
Good news: We had shrimp for dinner and I got enough to snack on for a day or so, too. 3 pounds total and yes, we love shrimp. I made a broth with the shells.
Bad news: I have no idea what to do with the shrimp broth.

That's about it...I know everyone is staggered with the excitement.
Calm down.

My best fuck-up in many years.

2010-01-08T00:43:00.007-05:00

In keeping with the best theme, which is going to get old quickly, please allow me to present you with my best fuck-up in years...maybe ever. It happened Wednesday and trust me, no matter how bad your shit might be right now, you'll read this and think "Okay, mine's bad but that might have been a little worse. Or at least equally as bad as mine." At least I think you will and I think you might feel a little better about your own life. That's my hope, anyway. Also, we may as well call this another one of my "really keeping it real" posts, much like my trashy house was because I've got a gut feeling I might be one of the only people in blogland to not only own up to this kind of stupidity, but show the results of it. Ready?

Backstory: I HATE my own financial matters and suck at them...always have, always will, I'm afraid. Well maybe not now, but we'll see on that. Give me the finances of a business to handle and I'm aces, even my own businesses. Let me take care of yours and I'll do a top-notch job. My own. It's bad. Really bad. Bills, banking stuff, investments? Hate them. As a result, I've had utilities shut off more than once, not because I didn't have the money...oh, no. Because I get my mail while in my car, so I tend to shove everything between catalog and magazine pages, then toss it in the backseat of my car where it emerges again only when I'm expecting company and I clean my car. This is my normal filing system except for important stuff like tax notices, insurance crap, investment stuff...those make it into the house and get shoved in a filing cabinet, unopened. Seriously. Checking account statements? Get shredded and trashed without even being opened because I check my checking account balance online every few days to see what I have in there. Over time, I have put all of my utility bills on autopay, which is a real blessing for someone like me. And I set up overdraft protection with another account so I don't even have to keep track of when those get pulled from checking. This, folks, is the extent of my ability to mind my own finances. How's that for some honesty? So, a little more backstory, I don't have a mortgage on my house, which means I have to pay my property taxes and insurance myself. Insurance is on autopay...yay. Property taxes can't be. Years ago, well, 6 exactly, Miss Arse told me to just give her my tax bill when it comes in and she'll pay it when she pays hers. That's not as generous as it sounds since we share one specific account so it was my money paying it but she would handle it and she's pretty good with this stuff for an old bird. So, twice I dropped my tax bill on her table...two years. Then I get served papers that my taxes are delinquent by 2 years. The hell? I go to her and she swears up and down she never told me any such thing. She doesn't lie and she's not senile so it had to have been some really awful misunderstanding...I trudge up and pay my taxes. In an effort to prevent this from *ever happening again, I tell her we need to turn over anything that says "tax" on it, be it federal or county, to the CPA who handles some other stuff for us. Just pay him to take care of it all. She agrees. I take my stuff to him and she says she will soon. He tells me he's going to semi-retire and so one of his employees will be handling my stuff, something I totally understand since I'm pretty peon-y in the financial world. He assures me things will be monitored and he'll alert me/us to any issues. We set up a deal where I autopay into an account quarterly for my property taxes and a couple of other things. Cool. That's how I like it...no muss, no fuss, let the professional keep me from muddling it all up and at a reasonable cost, comparatively speaking. So, for the last 4 years, I get my property tax bill, drop it off at his office and go on my merry way. Here's where I need to admit one *huge mistake I made in all this. Because really, I'm not blameless in this story. I never opened those tax bills. Ever. Like I said, I hate this shit and I'm paying someone to do it all so why should I? Well, I know why I *should now, but that was my reasoning.

Cut to day before yesterday, Wednesday. It's 1pm-ish, I'm still in my PJs, farming away and there's a knock on the door. Now, I never answer the door if I am not expecting anyone and particularly to people I don't know. I peek and see a young woman standing there, back to my window. I ignore her, even though I know she can see my car and that I have a TV on. She knocks again and I ignore her. She knocks a third time and something tells me to answer it. I do, all pissy-ish, and am immediately thrown off by her face. She's *so damn sweet and kind looking that, I kid you not, my first thought was that she looked like a Renaissance angel. In my confusion, I was nice to her. She stutters about how awkward this is and then tells me that she and her dad have been driving the neighborhood with a list of homes getting ready to be auctioned Thursday for delinquent taxes. Okay. She then asks if I know my home is on that list. Silence. I mean, I literally said nothing but my face must have shown my shock. She takes my hand, asks if I'm okay and explains that she just felt drawn to stop and check with me, that when she saw my house it just didn't look like the home of someone in that kind of situation. I finally get the words out that I didn't know, somehow stuttered a thank you and closed the door on her. And then I freaked. I mean, I came unglued. I first called the tax collector's office to confirm this and yes indeed, the deadline to pay was 4 hours away and they gave me a total. I gagged. I mean, I have no credit cards and I know I can't liquidate anything that fast...at least I don't think so. I call Miss Arse, screaming. Literally screaming. Now, those who know me well know that I've lost total control of myself maybe twice in my life. It's just something I don't do. But I did then. I mean, this is my *home. She calms me some and I start to think that hmmmm, unless the CPA embezzled my money, it ought to all still be right there in that account where it's being put quarterly. I call the bank and there it is, minus the huge amount of penalties, fees, advertising costs, legal fees, etc. that is now tacked on. For four years. Yes...FOUR years. They just never paid my taxes and no one ever told me. Well, except the county probably did tell me in those unopened envelopes I was dropping off. *sighs* See, I told you this was my fault. I called the CPA, had to leave a message and figured I'd deal with them later. So, I'm now down to three and a half hours to save my house, unshowered for the second day and now literally sick to my stomach and vomiting. I head for the bank where, with the help of some lovely ladies who understood the urgency (God, I love Wachovia, even before this deal), I head off to the tax collector's office with about an two hours left. You know, TO SAVE MY HOUSE. All because I can't get my shit together well enough to be a grown up and handle my own bills and finances properly.

Now, so that the lesson of my failure really sinks in with you all, would you like to see what this little unexpected...adventure...cost me yesterday? Because really, this is going to impact how we live for awhile and so much of it could have been avoided had I just, oh, you know...opened my mail.

Here. Click to enlarge it, then bask in the fact it wasn't you.
.

Don't you feel better about your own crap now?
I live to serve.

PS: Miss Arse's house taxes were fine. She never got around to taking her stuff to the CPA and has just been doing hers herself. Ughhhh.

Well, whatever.

2010-01-05T03:44:00.007-05:00

So, a couple of days into this blogging every day thing, I missed a day. I suck. I own it. Let's move on.
I mean, it's like a diet, right? If you cheat, you're supposed to pick it right back up where you left off and that's what I'm going to do now. I own my failure and will move on. *twisty-butted*

The last couple of days have been interesting and since I love a good list or two, I'll list the best and the worst. Let's hope they balance out.

Best:
1. Florida is experiencing record cold and I love it! My thermometers are reading 34 and 35, respectively. And yes, thermometers...plural. I'm a weather freak. I have an electronic weather station with monitors placed around my house and yard. At any given moment, I can tell you the humidity over by my twin palms or on my carport. Take your pick. I also like to monitor barometric pressure from time to time. I love my weather station. That said, I don't trust my weather station since batteries can fail. As a result, I've got a $2.50 thermometer attached to a white resin patio chair that I drag to my sliding glass door when anything interesting is going on, like now. It's a ni...um...jerry-rigged setup that, along with a coffee can partially buried in the ground, serves me well for extremes in temperature and rain. We'll see the 20's tonight and lower tomorrow. Love. It.

2. My house makes the "best" list. I have no heat in here other than some space heaters and, as of right now, 2:30 am, one big and one small one are holding the living room and my office at 64 degrees because of the way this place is built and the new windows I had put in when I bought it. Not too shabby. Our bedrooms are colder since we don't run space heaters in there. We just shut them off and bundle up for bed...it makes for great sleeping! It's too cold for the fur babies, though, especially since two are old ladies and I turn the big space heater off at night. I've spread fuzzy blankets and throws on the couch and loveseat and they're all nesting into the fuzzy goodness together. I di'nt raise no dumb felines. Or boys. But that's a different story.

3. We've been sipping on a huge batch of pumpkin curry soup all day and mmmm! If anyone wants the recipe, let me know but you have to love pumpkin and curry, or it's useless. Personally, I'm not happy if I can't smell curry in the house. I swear, my last name should have been Patel.

4. Jake and I have not left the house today but just had the best time. He's planning a new hairstyle, so we started the process with some crap to get the hot pink and purple out of his bleached parts. This means I do it for him...good times and it's an extremely cool hairstyle he's getting! Good enough that I wish I were young enough to get it, too. :-) I got to hear his newest song and lord have mercy, he's doing great in school so he's been busy with that and we've had no "gentle reminder" phone calls in ages. Basically, it's pure peace around here... laughing, eating, sharing, teasing, talking and debating. We had one snippy incident that was totally my fault because I was pissy about something else and took it out on him. I apologized. He laughed and said it was fine and asked who pissed me off. That led to a fun-as-hell discussion of people with issues which finally led to a discussion of midgets, as it invariably does. Life around here is chilly and hot liquid-y and very, very good!

Worst:

1. My tolerance of stupidity is low. Still. Always. Forever. I can stand dumb people who own being dumb and, in fact, embrace them since they are never as dumb as they think they are if they're able to realize this about themselves. But stupidity ? Is intolerable. The saying that stupid people shouldn't breed? Ought to be taught in school and in remedial classes to those who really need it. It should later be required as a parenting class for all parents. Credit can be given to those who can prove, annually, they are not stupid. Just imagine what a better world this could be if it happened.

2. I have no tolerance for bullshit, especially coming from stupid people (see above) who present themselves with rudeness and condescension. Disagreeing is good. Both sides can learn from that when done respectfully and a resulting respectful discussion ensues. Foolishness and lack of seeing one's own failings is not good when engaged in a logical, intelligent discussion. Do that and I? Step back and obsess over Farmville so that my fingers and tongue don't work in unison. I have farmed heartily today.

3. My camera isn't working right or I'd show you this "worst". Since all my space heaters are old as the hills, I went and bought two new ones a couple of days ago. One for large rooms, painfully expensive, and one for small rooms. The latter? Malfunctioned almost immediately and melted the plug on the heater cord, as well as the outlet cover, the wiring inside the wall and sent burn marks up my wall. I had no clue this was going on except I noticed that my little constantly-nervous-as-hell-once-feral boy cat, Tucker, kept going to that outlet area (just barely out of my sight) and then running to me and saying "maaaaaaaaaaa", the sound he makes when he wants me to pick him up and comfort him when he's scared. Only when I picked him up, he squiggled to get down and ran back to that outlet. Rinse and repeat. I finally got up to look and discovered that we were about to have a major fire problem since I saw big sparking. Tucker is a huge positive since he possibly saved our lives! But the fact I have all the residual damage is still a negative. Bah. Be careful, y'all. Those warnings about space heaters are founded in very real fact.

4. The fact my camera isn't working is a huge worst on my list, as is the fact I have a good camera on my cell phone, a Samsung Behold, and I can't figure out how to get pictures off it but am ashamed to ask Jake (who has the same phone) how to do it since I can generally do techie stuff with ease. I love my phone but it is smarter than I am...for now.

5. My washer is leaking from underneath and this is not good news. It is 14 years old and does a good 10-12 loads a week so my logical side knows it is time for it to be replaced. My fiscally-sensitive side is screaming "noooooo", though, and says we can mop and it'll be fine.

There you have it - my life in 10 points.

It's nearly 4am. I wonder if I've ever been bitten by a Tsetse fly.

Dammit.

2010-01-03T02:41:00.001-05:00

I'll say something before bed just so I don't break the post-every-day thing.but I can't think of any bests right now. Oh, I know. It's below freezing out right now. I have no heat but for some space heaters I just turned off. And I? Am in heaven. I'm cold as hell but love it...brrr!

Oh, and I'll share a totally unrelated picture of how Miss Arse used to amuse Jake. It's no wonder he's turned out as he has...and Jake, for me? Is absolutely the best kid ever, even though he's not a kid anymore.

Goodnight, all!

A day late and a dollar short.

2010-01-02T04:15:00.005-05:00

I've been in a blogging funk. There it is. The holidays have worn me out since I had to be social and upping my iron and switching my multi-vitamin produced no miracles. Although, as a side note, did you know they have gummie vitamins for adults now? Saw those and sadly got all excited. Anyway, I thought about posting some pictures but even though it is now clean and nice, my house seems so...poor...compared to others and, frankly, compared to others I've had, too. What seems fine-ish in person looks so run down in pictures so that discourages me. I've not had anything too exciting or drastic happen to tell about, at least not that I think anyone would find interesting. We had a nice Christmas but I'm finding it hard to imagine anyone would find it all that interesting. In the end, I think I might have some self-esteem issues. *sighs* So, tonight, I joined NaBloPoMo. It appears I now have to post every single day with a theme of "best" for the month of January. Wish me luck...I mean, I'm one of those people who have no issues with failing and owning it, basking in it even, so I don't have high hopes but I'm really going to try. I am. Really. Awwww, shut up and just go join NaBloPoMo with me and we'll bore everyone together. Also, yes, I know it is technically January 2nd and I'm sort of already a day late but I've not been to bed and I think it might still be the 1st in...um...Samoa. Or somewhere. Whatever, I'll do 2 today.

So, the theme this month is "best" and my plan is to share the best thing that happened to me every day, even if the best thing is only that I woke up. My best thing today (fine, yesterday) was the fact it turned cold and the temperature dropped all day and it was drizzly. I made scalloped potatoes (my most favorite food on earth), a pork roast, black eyed peas *blech*, fried apples, beer bread and a spinach salad. For dessert I made a Sweet Potato Cake, a favorite of my family. If you decide to make it, I will say that a spice cake mix is my preference but hey. it's your call. Miss Arse came over and we ate until we were about to pop and then lit candles all over the house for warmth and watched Constantine's Sword. Interesting movie, by the way. After she left, I slept in my recliner until around 1am, which is why I'm here, now, at 4am. My sleep habits suck. Anyway, the best part of my New Year's Day was that we were together, we ate good food and no one died. Look when you've got an 81 year old, a 47 year old with a chronic medical condition and an 18 year old and all the shit they do, any day that no one dies is good! In the end, the scalloped potatoes were really the best part of the day anyway.

So, who is in for NaBloPoMo with me? C'mon, y'all, this can be a resolution we can actually keep. One month, blog every day with the best of something. Let's see a show of hands. Or breasts. A show of breasts would be fine, too.

You know how every neighborhood has THAT house...?

2009-12-23T09:05:00.000-05:00

The house that's the trashiest one around? The one where you just know they sell drugs or handle stolen merchandise or something bad? The one that sticks out like a sore thumb in a sea of otherwise nice enough homes? Well, we have one on my street that inhabited by pure-d white trash. Thankfully it's 9 or 10 down from me and I rarely have to see it (or them) but it's only 2 away from Miss Arse and is one of the banes of her existence. Every year they decorate in typical white trash form for Christmas and as we drove around looking at lights, I noticed no one was home there. I seized the opportunity to get a picture of their festive yard ornament for you all. Enjoy!

And the winner is...

2009-12-21T10:53:00.007-05:00

...not me. I am not the winner since I'm the fool who had a few drinks and committed myself to showing my face. *sighs and laughs* It's worth it, though, because y'all are darn funny! I'm still a little stunned at Bella's guess of "You are a Florida Lady, which means you are LJ, or Lady Jerky. Tanned, with a brown, spikey mullet." A mullet, Bella? Really? That just pained me...lol...it was funny as hell but good God, I must give off some scary impression.

Let's get to the good stuff, though, shall we? In the end, I had a tie between Gayle and Belladonna1125! Both were at least in the right ballpark. See? *waves hi to everyone*

That's me, poking fun of The Houseguest behind her back. Never let me stand behind you in pictures...trust me.

Look! I have a big mouth in more ways than one. So, these were the only pictures of me that I'd dare share and since I stopped coloring my hair, I do have more gray showing now but it is still very dark, just a "salt and pepper" dark. It is naturally nearly black, as are my eyes. I'm 5'9" and and heavy enough I wind up in the plus sizes more often than not, which kills me. It just doesn't kill me enough to actually, you know, *do anything about it. Oh, and anyone who labeled my bosom as formidable and pillowy or some version thereof would be correct. I am built like a big, strong farm woman. I don't want to talk about that anymore, thankyouverymuch. I do wear glasses at home and contacts when I go out. My fingernails and toenails are always painted and I never, ever wear shorts in public. Also, contrary to what a lot of you seemed to think and were afraid to say, I'm actually very feminine. :-D So, who won the contest? I know that's what everyone is really waiting for, isn't it? Wellllp, I wadded both names up and tossed them on the floor. 3 out of 4 cats ran, smelled the marker and backed waaaaay off. So much for that idea. With much encouraging and about 15 minutes of dry-time, one of my old lady cats, Ginger, finally came and sniffed very curiously at the bottom one and then pounced on and batted the top one which, of course, I didn't manage to get a picture of since I was convinced that bottom one was her choice.

Whose name was it? It was...

Congratulations, Gayle! If you'll email me at anemonepie@yahoo.com with your name and the address you'd like your prize sent to, I'll do my damnedest to get it out this week!

Now, I do have one last order of business. I have a second little prize I was keeping secret...a prize for the answer that made me really laugh and I didn't mention it so that everyone gave a natural response. I think we all know who won this prize, don't we? No one topped Trudy's dwarf in a walker answer, which took me a minute to catch onto and then I literally cackled out loud. That was beautiful! Trudy, I'll be sending you a 1 ounce bottle of Geoffrey Beene For Women.

It, too, is suitable for regifting in case you aren't into smell-good things. I still have your address from something else so I'll send it to you there, if that's okay?

Thanks so much for playing along with me, y'all...this was a lot of fun!

Mullet, my ass. Damn, Bella...I still can't get over that.

Ha! I'm having a contest!

2009-12-19T00:37:00.000-05:00

I've always wanted to do one of these and, while doing a little housekeeping (whaaaat? I'm all neat now and back to my normal, anal, housekeeping ways) I found a few items I had tucked away as gifts for unexpected events. The thing is, we have no unexpected events anymore and these are very nice items just stored in a box. I hate for them to waste away so I think I'll have a few little contests and gift them out. Trust me, I have nothing as exciting as Lightroom *grins* but I do have a few things a mom who has been shopping for everyone but herself might enjoy getting. So, let's have some fun, shall we?

My first contest ends midnight EST this Sunday (the 19th) night, so roughly 47 hours from this posting. The prize is a 3.4 ounce bottle of Scaasi EPT spray, brand new and in the box so suitable for regifting, too! It is described as: "Launched by the design house of Scaasi in 1989, Scaasi is classified as a sharp, flowery fragrance. This feminine scent possesses a blend of delicious greenery and citrus, with aromatic florals and woodsy base notes of vanilla and musk. It is recommended for casual wear."

It retails for around $35 so not a bad little prize for no more than you have to do to win. What do you have to do, you ask? Well, it's simple. I've decided to show my face and based on what you know about me from the blog world, including my own blog, I'd like you to tell me what you think I look like in my comments. In detail. And don't be shy or politically correct, spare me no mercy. If you think I'm obese, say so. If you think I'm wrinkled and gray, same deal. If you think I'm an emasculated and balding man, go for it. If you think I'm a supermodel, I will laugh at you but appreciate the thought. "Bitch" isn't a physical description but hey, I'll disqualify no one! Be honest and I'll be honest back...the one that comes closest, even if it is painful for me to admit, will win. In the event of a tie, I'll wad names up on paper and toss them on the floor. The one Beatrice (aka Casserole Cat) picks by batting it will win.

Sound fair? Then let's play!

Disclaimer or something: Some of you know I'm close friends with Robin from Big Sky. While, weirdly, I don't know that she's seen any recent pictures of me, I'm going to disqualify her in the interest of fairness and make it up to her later. Lol...I've been known to mail good-smelling cleaning products to her, so she won't mind.

Keeping it real. REALLY real.

2009-12-13T00:00:00.004-05:00

Yeah, I've been gone awhile. I've have blogger's block or something. More like no life. Actually, that's not true...I've been feeling not-quite-right for a couple of weeks now, very fatigued and yes, that's important to this post. See, I typically decorate for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving and have it done in one day. I do the inside while Jake does the outside and so the day after Thanksgiving this year I dragged everything out and have proceeded to look at it daily, every day, all scattered, and just sort of shrug my shoulders and have a nap in the recliner. Trust me, for a neat freak like me, this is seriously awful. Hell, for a pig, it's awful. Thing is, no one really believes I've let my house get *this bad since it's so unlike me and that little fact inspired me to take pictures of it today. We may as well all laugh about it, no? And unlike so many bloggers who talk about "keeping it real" while showing a small pile of fake dirty dishes in their sink while swearing their house is a sty, I'm going to show you what "keeping it real" is really like in my house right now. I figure y'all will divide off into two groups - those freaked out and swear you will never eat anything out of my kitchen or set foot in my door and those who want to hug me for making your own homes look more normal. Be sure to tell me which group you fit into. ;-)

Now, I don't know what y'all find when you move your loveseat, but this is what I found under mine when I moved it to make room for the Christmas tree. I was missing that Chapstick and a spare AAA battery is always nice to have. I know I felt like I hit a little jackpot.

Here's a portion of my living room floor, by my entertainment center. Oh, there are many items of interest here, from a filthy vacuum that needs emptied *and cleaned to the pile of dirty laundry with an old, ratty bra tossed on top, to the poor cat who took refuge (minus that one leg) in her pirate ship. I cannot stress enough that this is in the middle of my living room and has been for days.

This is the view from my living room into my dining room and yes, I know I have a tiny house. Such is life. :-)

Please note the beautifully draped curtains in the dining room, the table and chairs shoved aside, the Christmas tree box, the laundry basket...oh, just all of it. Bask in it. And while you're at it, be very, very jealous you don't have a green bungee cord hanging out of your loveseat, too.

Ahhh, the view to the front door. Please note the pile of towels in front of the TV and the Walmart bag of trash on my front door knob. Flotsam and jetsam, it's the only way to be thinking right now. Oh, and that's my recliner I speak so fondly of. Everyone, meet Recliner. Recliner, meet the people I leave you for. That's also my 14 year old, 27" TV. Go me!

I did buy a new Glade warmer in some holly berry somethingorotherscent the other day. The entire package made it to the top of the entertainment center along with the new pot I bought for warming scented oils. I did, at least, open that. Oh, hey, I see my dead cell phone back there now. I've been wondering where that was.

More of the same, different angle, below. When it is vacuumed, that rug actually has distinct colors.

Lest you think this is all artfully staged like some (a-hem) people do, allow me to show you the cat brush full of hair that has laid on the coffee table for at least 3 days.

I will say, my kitchen is fairly clean but we do have a few health hazards going on, like Gina in the napkin basket up on top of the fridge. Is now the time to share that she has tumors in her ears that tend to open and drain? No? Oh, I'm sorry.

Well, you'll at least come for dinner, won't you? We're having a casserole.

And that, folks, is what "keeping it real" is all about. I'm ashamed, yes, but I'm also amused and figured if I can't be a role model, I can at least set a bad example. Have at me. I deserve it. :-D

Did you know I have a favorite preacher?

2009-12-03T13:39:00.002-05:00

I do. Is it weird for a non-Christian to have a favorite preacher? I wonder that sometimes, but there's not much I can do about it. I know many of you enjoyed learning about Huston Smith and hopefully you'll take some time and enjoy learning about Carlton Pearson, too. Every time I listen to him, I'm left with the thought that finally...FINALLY...someone is trying to get Christianity back on track and back to what Jesus really taught. And that? Warms this non-Christian's heart. Watch these, if you have the time and then, if you have a little more time, tell me what you think. :-)

The day from hell has many hours left.

2009-12-01T16:30:00.006-05:00

Last night sucked. I had nightmares, bad ones, and interspersed with the nightmares, I had a cat who vomited all night long. Lovely, no? I realize now that I should have embraced those moments as being wonderful instead of feeling all sorry for myself, but did I? Oh, noooooo. I decided to call it done around 8am, stumbled to get together a cup of instant coffee and slipped in some vomit I missed. Down I went, taking out an already-troublesome knee and covered in what was, at one point, last night's Fancy Feast. I'm fairly certain I said "motherfucker" a few times, in case anyone wonders. I'm not one to give in to adversity, though, so I crawl up, and still determined that caffeine will help, I make my coffee and gimp off to my recliner. As I sat there, drinking coffee and whining to Miss Arse, I realize I feel very wet. My immediate thought was, "Dear God, did I just lose control of my bladder and didn't even know it?" because, if I'm honest, that's just one of those burdens I expect God to give me to bear one of these days. I jump and feel around, realizing that cat vomit wasn't the worst of my worries...one of my precious little spawns of the devil had peed in my recliner. But, oh, the worse things get, the more I am determined to find it all funny and strap my chipper mood on. So, I gather up the quilt I always have it covered with and take to the leather with Lysol. At this point, I relax because really, that's enough for anyone to have happen in one morning. Jake gets up, we get dressed quickly since he got called to work on very short notice and I figure I'll shower when I get back in about 15 minutes, we go out to the car and guess what, chicken butt? My car is dead. Thankfully, I'm fairly car-savvy and know immediately it's the battery, but why? Nothing was left on and the battery is less than 2 years old. But, this will not break me. I will just take that battery out, bum a ride from a neighbor to the autoparts store and get a new one. This? Is not awful, I figure...it could be worse, anyway. I go to get my tools and oh, please, guess what happened! Please! If you guessed that someone had been in my utility room and stole my tool box, a grinder and my Dent King thingie, you'd win the prize. I debated about calling the cops but really, why? I'll never see that stuff again. But now, here I am with no tools and a battery that needs to be taken out. Ever resourceful, I flagged down a man who lives around the corner and who happened to be driving past...I don't know him, but I figured we'd be friends after this. He was nice enough to come back and even remove the battery. Ahhh, a sign the day is going better. I got another neighbor to take me to the auto parts store where they determined that yup, the battery is dead. The good news is, they can recharge it and it'll be fine. I admit, I wasn't too thrilled with this idea but it was free and they were convinced it would be fine, so I went with it. As I was leaving, a nice older man told me to bring the car in once I get it installed and they'll test it with the car running to make sure it's okay. Will do. Get it in, return the new neighbor-friend's tools he lent me and go have my car checked, where they promptly tell me the battery is reading bad. Whatfuckever, at this point. I buy a new battery and listen to them tell me what I need to relay to a repair shop as far as electrical drains and I leave, taking Jake to work. On the way home I stop in Winn Dixie figuring I'd test things by shutting the car off and if it was dead, I was in a safe, easy spot close to home for Miss Arse to come get me. I carefully found a parking space where I could pull all the way through in case I needed to be towed out or something, expecting the worst. I buy my chicken and some more Lysol, get back in the car, hold my breath and turn the key. It starts!! Finally, *finally, something went right! I just wanted to cry with relief. As I sat there basking in the glow of a working battery, I am suddenly shot forward out of my parking space by about a foot. I knew. I just knew that particular feeling and as I looked back, sure enough, some old guy had pulled in behind me and lost control, back-ending me in a freaking parking space. Ugh. I get out, he's about to cry, I'm about to cry, we do the whole exchange information thing and I reassure him I am not going to sue him as long as his insurance covers the (amazingly minor) damage. I tell myself I made my second new friend of the day because I'm all about positive spins and bluebirds of happiness, dontcha know. Me, my bad knee, my car, my crooked bumper, my new battery and my chicken make it home and all I can think of is a hot shower and food. I'm stripping clothes off as I walk to my bathroom, climb in the shower and oooh, what do we have here? No water? NO FUCKING WATER? Oh, hell, no. No, no and no. I call the water company and they tell me I was notified several days ago that they'd have my water off all this afternoon to repair some pipes. Bullshit, I was notified. I was not. I argue with the woman and she argues back. Then she clearly informs me that I did have a hang tag put on my front door. I did? On my front door, the one I never, ever use and that probably hasn't been opened in 3 months? Why, yes indeedy, there's that tag on my front door knob, tucked safely behind my storm door so that no human being could possibly see it from the yard or anything. *eyeroll*

So, here I sit. Filthy from cat vomit and urine, knee all swelled up, starving but not wanting to get around food until I've showered, exhausted, dreading dealing with an insurance company over bumper repairs that I just know I won't be happy with, dreading dealing with a repair shop about the electrical problem, worn out and I'll be damned, this day isn't over yet. But, I did get a rotisserie chicken for $2.99 and that was a good thing. See? I'm just a little ray of hopeful fucking sunshine, I am.

The lesbian's guide to having pretty balls for Christmas.

2009-11-29T21:46:00.000-05:00

I decided to try to snap myself out of the "oh, pitiful me" funk I'm in (probably due to my birthday) and nothing makes me happier than a good 5th grade craft project. I decided to focus on Christmas and happened to think about something my mom made a few years ago after seeing them at a craft fair. Hey, that was all the incentive I needed. I hit Walmart and picked up the supplies I thought I'd need to make these balls. Some of the stuff, like a drill and bits and a stapler, I already had. Here's what I thought I needed...I chose blue lights with white wire since I planned on hanging these outside if they work, and I decorate in blue lights. Any color ought to work and I'm thinking any color of transparent cups should work, too, but I'd use clear lights if I used colored cups. Without further ado, here's my starting plan:

I figured out quickly that a fat-assed drill bit is needed. At least bigger than I originally thought. After a few false starts, I found that a 3/8" bit was good but if you happen to have a 1/2" one, that would be good, too. I had to do a little forcing with a 3/8" hole, even though it did work. See, I got a light in the drilled hole and if you buy a set of 100 lights, you'll need to get 2 in that hole. 3/8" still works and probably gives a better hold than 1/2" would but yeah, either will work. You'll have to drill through 50 of these cups for a full ball or 25 for a half ball to hang against a wall. I did these one by one in my dining room, risking a new and unintended piercing in my hand each time. I live life on the edge like that. If you have some scrap wood, you could stack a load of cups on the wood and drill through them all at once to save on time and fear. A lesson learned through my own pathetic lack of math skills: If you are doing a 1/2 ball, use a strand of 50 lights (two in each hole). I don't want to discuss that further. Just know your lights need to go as shown in the picture below, only 2 per hole.

Once you've confirmed you can fit the lights in, put the lights aside for now. We need to build this damn thing. I used staples. If you have a better way of attaching two plastic cups together, by all means try it. Have a stapler and staples handy, since I think you'll probably resort to them in the end. Put the cups together with sides touching all the way down, stapling once or twice as shown below, to attach. The sides must touch in order to achieve the round shape needed to make a ball. Goddamn, my hand looks like something out of a Japanese horror movie. Sorry about that. Anyway, staple the cups (minus lights) together.

They need to form a circle like this:

Ruh-roh...learn from my mistake. Do *not staple the cups together while holding them upright in your ugly-looking hand, as I did. As you can see below, it causes them to be un-level and trust me, this will throw the whole project off. See?

It causes a person to have to pick out many, many staples. This is annoying.

So, (re)staple the cups as they lay flat on a table and once you have a connected, stapled base circle, begin adding another layer of cups on top, matching edges but staggering cups. Lay them as shown below, with each new cup on top of the connection of two cups below. Brick style, I guess it would be. Staple accordingly.

Your third level will consist of 4 cups. You have to work with these a little and some slight force may be necessary to make them fit. They won't fit perfectly, no matter how frustrated you get and no matter how many times you mutter "motherfucker." Trust me. Get them in the best you can and staple them before they make you cuss more. Now, repeat this whole painful procedure on a second ball half, since it will take both halves to make make one ball. If you want only one half ball to hang against a flat surface, then move on to inserting the string of 50 lights you have.

As if this project couldn't get more annoying, we're going to install the lights now. Start with the female end and in the center of one half (it's really important to start in the center, I found out the hard way), begin gently forcing 2 bulbs through each hole working to the outside set of cups in a clockwise manner. If you're going to use this outside, you might feel better sealing up the female end of the plug with electrical tape and you definitely need to end up on one of the outside cups of the ball half.

Here's where I really fail in my instructions. I could not get a decent shot of what I need you to do next so I'll try to keep it simple and will hope it makes sense...much like how it is when I try to explain why I ever got married. Anyway, take your other ball half that has no lights in it and grab the male end of your light strand. Starting with the light closest to the male plug, begin doing the exact thing again, inserting 2 lights, one at a time, into each hole beginning in center of the ball and working clockwise outward. As you reach the last outside cups to fill with lights, you will have been working toward the middle of the strand and the first half of the light ball will be being pulled closer to you. As a result, your very last two lights will be a pain in the ass to insert. Once they are in, the worst is over and you can staple the two halves together, as shown below. Make sure the male plug is hanging out, though, since this is how you'll plug it in. Really, it's a lot like people, as I think of it.

I suck at pictures in the dark, but here's a bad shot of my finished project. These things are amazingly pretty at night, no matter what colors you use. They're also a cute addition to a teen's room or a patio area for year-around use. With money as tight as it is for everyone these days, this was a $6 project that I think rivals the $20+ light up ornaments sold in stores. They'll be cheaper yet if you do half balls and can get 2 light-up ornaments out of the deal, plus, it's a great family project.

It's really pathetic that it took me all damn day to figure these out and the fact I'm excited about a craft project that involves plastic cups is more than a little sad, too. However, I feel happy when I see them and I think they'll be pretty hanging outside, so pfffffttttt! Make some. You'll like 'em.

Whoring myself out on Facebook, Farm Town, etc.

2009-11-28T01:14:00.001-05:00

Wanted: Free Facebook friends and Farm Town neighbors. Must be sane-ish and willing to tell me how you found my blog if you don't know the secret handshake so that I know you aren't some weird creep who just wants to watch my farm. It is fine for you to send me invites to other games and things - I might even accept - but please don't be pissy if I don't. I've turned down requests from family for Mafia Wars and I love them more than you. That's not to say I might not get a wild hair and play with you anyway, but you must promise to take no offense if I don't. I'm not overly chatty, so no concerns on your part that I will be flooding your whatever-you-read-Facebook-with. Mostly, I read what everyone is up to and farm my new farm there. FTR, I have two other farms you will never know about, but I'm no Farm Town virgin. Obviously, I'm looking for a long-term commitment, but a one night stand is fine as long as you make me your FarmTown neighbor. Having a farm is not a requirement, though...I'll take friends, too, since I like people-watching. :-) Search my email: anemonepie@yahoo.com

I got tagged.

2009-11-25T01:43:00.004-05:00

I got tagged by Erin so let's see what I can do here

5 Things I was Doing 10 years Ago
1. 10 years ago come December 13, I was telling my husband I wanted a divorce and owning up to an affair. So, 10 years ago tonight? I was probably scared shitless.
2. I was an unschooling mom and still support unschooling when "done" right.
3. I was living in a house over twice the size of the one I live in now with the most gorgeous green marble floors ever. I still miss the floors there.
4. I was feeding our big old German Rottie, Ruger. He was a lovely dog and I don't even like dogs very much.
5. I was wearing clothing in the single digits.

5 Things On My To-Do List Today
"1. Empty cat boxes. It has actually been on my list for a week. I love it so much, that I keep moving it to the bottom. NOW it is mandatory. And for those who wonder, NO, I can't get the boys to do it. They do SUCH a horrible job, I have to not only redo them, but clean the entire bathroom. I know they planned it that way, and let me tell you...it worked."
This is actually on Erin's list and I'm cracking up since I could have written it myself and thought "oh, the litterboxes" the moment I read the question. I'm just going with her answer here.
2. Make the pumpkin trifle and deviled eggs for Thanksgiving.
3. Empty all the dead annuals out of the pots and put silk flowers in until Spring.
4. Go around the outside of the house with borax.
5. Clean out the fridge.

5 Snacks I Love
1. Chicken In A Biscuit crackers.
2. Cold leftovers.
3. Yogurt.
4. Guacamole and most anything that will hold it.
5. Tins of smoked oysters.

5 Things I Would Do If I Were A Millionaire:
1. Get a new roof.
2. Add a small, 5' deep (I hate deep water) enclosed pool out back.
3. Buy new cars...a Dodge Ram 4x4 quad cab for me and Dodge Nitros for my mom and Jake.
4. Buy a few investment homes in my neighborhood and rent them out at do-able rents to families who have fallen on hard times.
5. Donate to the local hospice that helped with my dad.

5 Jobs I’ve Had
1. Co-owned a trucking company. Both hated and loved it. Passionately.
2. Owned an employment agency. This was fun, although not terribly lucrative.
3. Owned a painting (faux, decorative, murals) business. Loved this. Passionately. Poor money, much glory.
4. Manager of a Nutri/System center. Got in trouble for sleeping with my boss. Long hours, free diet food, sucked at meeting sales goals personally, even though my center was always a top performer. I hire well.
5. Office manager/assistant to the CEO for a management company that took derelict properties and turned them into night clubs and supper clubs. Loved this job and quit only because they were relocating to South America and I didn't want to leave my folks that far behind. Met Jake's dad here. Bonus points, since I got my kid out of it.

I'm supposed to tag 5 people now...
Big Sky
Bella
Tales of a Barmy Sandgroper
Janice
Nic

Positives.

2009-11-24T04:17:00.000-05:00

I figured I'd share something positive, to try to overcome some of the negativity I've been feeling. As you may know by now, I'm a craigslist addict. It's like people watching on the internet...such fun! Very late last night I ran across an ad for a lost dog that was, weirdly, posted in the "wanted" section. A bit later, I found an ad for a dog matching the description, and in the same area, in the lost and found section. Figuring I got lucky, I emailed both parties, referencing the ads of the other. Sure enough, I managed to reunite a lost Jack Russell terrier with its owner. I don't even like JR terriers but this made me very, very happy. Probably not as happy as it made the person who found the yappy little bastard, though.

Miss Arse has had a stomach virus that had me concerned for a couple of days. At 81, anything can kill you. She called me tonight to tell me she ate some scrambled eggs and toast and "didn't puke her guts up." Well, yay...lol.

I am learning to let my son go. I know, I know, that sounds weird to be a positive thing but we have an unusually close bond and it's been hard for me to accept that he is 18, an adult. This trip he made to Ben's has been good for me. I realize it's broken a lot of the mother/child bond and I'm okay-ish with him being grown and making his own decisions, even when I think that they are stupid decisions. It's on him now, at least to a great degree. Some of the nervous, chest-twisting concern has let up because while I love him no less, I know it's out of my hands now. I accept that he is like me and is going to have to royally fuck up a few times before he gets it all figured out. The difference between me and my folks? Will make all the difference in the world, I hope, since I accept this as part of his life and will not permanently judge him for it.

Lastly, I leave you with Huston Smith and more.

Gobble gobble.

2009-11-17T23:11:00.000-05:00

I know, I know...I've been neglecting my blog. I'm in a funk. Part of it is Jake being gone but I have come to realize I could adapt to him being gone for something good, like going away to college. I'd miss him, yes, but I would be fine with it. It's him being gone and doing something I don't approve of that is just wearing me out. And that? Caused me to apologize to Miss Arse this morning for everything I put her through at his age. She? Was her ever-gracious self and said it was about damn time I apologized. I love her. I hope I'm just like her if I make it to 81. I'm working on it...I went to Walmart today and got four of their 40-cent-a-pound turkeys at just shy of 15 pounds each. This required two trips through the checkouts since they are limit two. I figured two for my freezer and two for hers, one of which would be Thanksgiving dinner. I think I am all devious, slipping into her utility room to put them in her freezer to surprise her...I open her freezer and there? Are two turkeys. I go get her, cracking up, and find out she's done *exactly the same thing at a different Walmart and that I, too, already have two turkeys in my freezer. So, we now have close to 120 pounds of turkey between us. That's just ridiculous so we're going to find a four people or families in the neighborhood who could use a little help and surprise them with a turkey and some basic trimmings. We figure we'll drop everything on doorsteps around 5am the Monday before and run. What fun...I've always wanted to do this! But can someone help me and my bacteria-fearing ways? Will a frozen turkey be okay at outside air temp (60-ish) for 2-3 hours? I don't want them to be really thawed in case people want to put them back in a freezer and save them for Christmas. Any thoughts or ideas?

Call me overly cautious...

2009-11-12T16:04:00.001-05:00

...but I don't think I'm daring enough to use a laxative called "Berry Burst." Because, really, what if it's not just a flavor?

Happy Veterans Day

2009-11-11T14:11:00.002-05:00

Thank you, especially to those who served in WWII or had family members who did.

My dad was so very proud of his service to this country and what it stood for. And I'm still so very proud of him.

More on abortion because it's just so darn thought-provoking.

2009-11-09T23:29:00.001-05:00

So, here we are again. We're back on this topic because in my daily, obsessive scouring of the news, I found this story. Don't worry about the Fox News thing - I read news from many different sources, I swear. Anyway, back to my point...here's the story. Man Accused of Shooting Kansas Abortion Doctor Confesses to Killing This guy? Is one I'd list as a hero. Do I like the idea of killing someone? Oh, hell, no. But, I can say that I would kill in self defense and I would kill to protect an innocent, helpless baby from being killed. Or an old person. Wouldn't you? Now, I know, I know...the big debate all centers around whether or not a fetus is a baby. I say no, but that's just my own personal thought I figured I'd mention again. I believe it enough, though, that I think what Scott here did was misguided and wrong, no matter how genuinely he believes he was saving babies. And make no mistake, this man genuinely believes he was saving babies from being killed. So, ask yourself this - if (because we need a name) Joe killed some monster who was ripping apart a little newborn in a stroller, blood and little body parts flying, would you, in your heart, be okay if Joe shot that monster dead? I would be. And I'd stand up for Joe in a heartbeat, if anyone tried to arrest him for murder. Wouldn't you? I hope you would. So, what's the difference in what our imaginary Joe did and what Scott in this article did? I mean, after all, as I've said, no one really knows when life begins...we can only guess and speculate. Now, just to throw another thought into all this, Kansas, the state in which Scott shot the abortion doctor, has Alexa's Law to protect the unborn. Alexa's Law states that "an unborn child, meaning a living individual organism of the species homo sapiens, in utero, at any stage of gestation from fertilization to birth, is defined as a 'person' and a 'human being' for the purposes of Kansas statutes against first degree murder, second degree murder, capital murder, voluntary manslaughter, involuntary manslaughter, vehicular homicide, and numerous battery offenses..." So, if Kansas means this, if they *really believe this, why in the world is this man, Scott Roeder, being charged with murder? At worst, shouldn't it be only a weapons charge if his gun isn't legal? Or...and this is the big one, folks...is it just different for doctors to do the very same thing that some addict with a stolen gun might to do a pregnant woman in a home invasion, all because the doctor has a college degree and license to kill? Does state law negate morals? The Bible? "Thou shalt not kill"...unless the government licensing bureau says it is okay? Just something to perhaps, hopefully, make you go "hmmmmmm". Kansas says those are babies. By Kansas' own statute, their own legal definition, he killed someone who was killing babies and who, minus a license, would be charged with murder. He put his own life on the line to save the very beings Kansas says it is murder to destroy. He saved the very lives Kansas itself says are lives. So, tell me, is he a hero, at least in Kansas? Or not? I still vote yes.

BOLO!! BOLO!!

2009-11-08T01:51:00.001-05:00

Be on the lookout - we have a leg missing!

LOST: Baby's prosthetic leg

"A 19-month-old lost his prosthetic leg while he was out trick-or-treating on Halloween night. It is tan, and it looks like a baby's leg from about the knee down to the foot (it probably has a little shoe or sneaker on it)."

Now, really. How does this happen and it not be noticed?