May 9, 2011

A post-Mother's Day post.

So, yesterday was Mother's Day (still today in my mind since I've not been to bed)...

Some comments from Miss Arse:

Upon seeing I was wearing the gold hoop earrings she gave me when Jake was born, the same earrings I wear 90% of the time and have now for nearly 20 years since they were *that special to me:  "I see you're wearing the earrings I gave you...I'm shocked you've not lost one by now."

After taking Jake to Publix and Walgreens with her, him looking for all the world like Courtney Love after a rough night:  "People were staring at him, Lisa, but I just pretended I didn't care.  We all have our crosses to bear."

The other day, on a shopping adventure we had at Lowe's, she bought herself a new chainsaw.  I made her swear she'd not use it without at least calling me first, so I'd know to check on her later.  Like in 10 minutes, lol.  "Guess what I did this morning?  I chainsawed out all the arborvitae under your old bedroom window!"  Upon scolding her for not calling me first: "Oh, I just said I would to shut you up."

After looking over the good dinner I'd made us...BBQ ribs, fresh-scraped fried corn, french fries, salad..."This all looks so good, but you *are starting your diet back up tomorrow, aren't you? Not that I'm pushing you, because you know you need to lose weight without me pointing it out." 

Background on this one, but my first Mother's Day after Jake was born was awful.  His dad took my car and chose to spend the night before out with his brother at a strip club, got too drunk to drive and didn't make it home until the next afternoon. When he came home, he presented me with a card and a tacky necklace with Jake's birthstone in it, expecting me to be thrilled.  I accused him of picking it up on the way home as an afterthought.  He denied it to the point he made my life a living hell for about a week.  A few weeks later, I was cleaning my car out and found the receipt for the card and necklace shoved under the seat of my car...bought Mother's Day afternoon, on his way home.  My mom, reminiscing:  "Remember your first Mother's Day?  It was bad, wasn't it?"   Yes, it was, Mom...thanks for reminding me.

And her best one?  "Remember the year you sneaked and moved out on Mother's Day?"  Me, bursting into tears as I do every time this is even *thought of, since it's one of the things I feel most guilty for in life:  "Yesssss, and I'm soooo sorry.  *tears flowing*  I was just young and screwed up and stupid."  Miss Arse:  "Oh, Honey, I didn't mean to make you cry...I don't care anymore."  

So, if anyone wonders where my lack of tact came from and why I constantly work on fixing it and constantly fail miserably, now you know. I'm fighting against genetics and it's hard.  Or maybe...just maybe...I secretly like being this way.  ;-)

PS:  I had a really nice day with her and Jake...it was good.  I hope yours was, too.  Tomorrow, she and I start our Casey Anthony trial obsessing.  Anyone else going to watch this with us?

3 comments:

Ami said...

Glad you had a nice Mother's Day with Jake and Miss Arse. :) I'll be watching the CA trial... wondering how in the world they'll manage to get an impartial jury with all of the news coverage at the time. I wouldn't want to sit on that one. (And I'm a strange person who actually enjoyed the one time I was called to jury duty!)

Lisa, aka AP said...

Oooh, did you see jury selection today, Ami? Casey was a wreck, wasn't she? We watched TRU TV until they broke for the day and now I'm watching live on CNN.com/live. They're on break right now but I really like Judge Perry very much. He's not a media hound, which is refreshing. I could be impartial here...I always said I'd have had to have found OJ not guilty, even though I believed (still do) that he was guilty. The evidence just didn't back it up. So, I think I could be impartial here, too, and I think many others can be, as well. So, what do you think? Did she do it? was it on purpose or an accident she tried to cover?

Tee said...

I love Miss Arse! And you! Very glad to see your return to blogging!