And the winner is...

...not me.  I am not the winner since I'm the fool who had a few drinks and committed myself to showing my face.  *sighs and laughs*  It's worth it, though, because y'all are darn funny!  I'm still a little stunned at Bella's guess of "You are a Florida Lady, which means you are LJ, or Lady Jerky. Tanned, with a brown, spikey mullet."  A mullet, Bella? Really?  That just pained me...lol...it was funny as hell but good God, I must give off some scary impression.

Let's get to the good stuff, though, shall we?  In the end, I had a tie between Gayle and Belladonna1125!  Both were at least in the right ballpark.  See?  *waves hi to everyone*

That's me, poking fun of The Houseguest behind her back.  Never let me stand behind you in pictures...trust me.

Look!  I have a big mouth in more ways than one.  So, these were the only pictures of me that I'd dare share and since I stopped coloring my hair, I do have more gray showing now but it is still very dark, just a "salt and pepper" dark.  It is naturally nearly black, as are my eyes.  I'm 5'9" and and heavy enough I wind up in the plus sizes more often than not, which kills me.  It just doesn't kill me enough to actually, you know, *do anything about it.  Oh, and anyone who labeled my bosom as formidable and pillowy or some version thereof would be correct.  I am built like a big, strong farm woman.  I don't want to talk about that anymore, thankyouverymuch.  I do wear glasses at home and contacts when I go out.  My fingernails and toenails are always painted and I never, ever wear shorts in public.  Also, contrary to what a lot of you seemed to think and were afraid to say, I'm actually very feminine.  :-D  So, who won the contest?  I know that's what everyone is really waiting for, isn't it?  Wellllp, I wadded both names up and tossed them on the floor.  3 out of 4 cats ran, smelled the marker and backed waaaaay off.  So much for that idea.  With much encouraging and about 15 minutes of dry-time, one of my old lady cats, Ginger, finally came and sniffed very curiously at the bottom one and then pounced on and batted the top one which, of course, I didn't manage to get a picture of since I was convinced that bottom one was her choice.

Whose name was it?  It was...

Congratulations, Gayle! If you'll email me at anemonepie@yahoo.com with your name and the address you'd like your prize sent to, I'll do my damnedest to get it out this week! 

Now, I do have one last order of business.  I have a second little prize I was keeping secret...a prize for the answer that made me really laugh and I didn't mention it so that everyone gave a natural response.  I think we all know who won this prize, don't we?   No one topped Trudy's dwarf in a walker answer, which took me a minute to catch onto and then I literally cackled out loud.  That was beautiful!  Trudy,  I'll be sending you a 1 ounce bottle of Geoffrey Beene For Women.

It, too, is suitable for regifting in case you aren't into smell-good things.  I still have your address from something else so I'll send it to you there, if that's okay? 

Thanks so much for playing along with me, y'all...this was a lot of fun!

Mullet, my ass.  Damn, Bella...I still can't get over that.