Dec 13, 2009

Keeping it real. REALLY real.

Yeah, I've been gone awhile.  I've have blogger's block or something.  More like no life.  Actually, that's not true...I've been feeling not-quite-right for a couple of weeks now, very fatigued and yes, that's important to this post.  See, I typically decorate for Christmas the day after Thanksgiving and have it done in one day.  I do the inside while Jake does the outside and so the day after Thanksgiving this year I dragged everything out and have proceeded to look at it daily, every day, all scattered, and just sort of shrug my shoulders and have a nap in the recliner.  Trust me, for a neat freak like me, this is seriously awful.  Hell, for a pig, it's awful.  Thing is, no one really believes I've let my house get *this bad since it's so unlike me and that little fact inspired me to take pictures of it today.  We may as well all laugh about it, no?  And unlike so many bloggers who talk about "keeping it real" while showing a small pile of  fake dirty dishes in their sink while swearing their house is a sty,  I'm going to show you what "keeping it real" is really like in my house right now.  I figure y'all will divide off into two groups - those freaked out and swear you will never eat anything out of my kitchen or set foot in my door and those who want to hug me for making your own homes look more normal.  Be sure to tell me which group you fit into.  ;-)

Now, I don't know what y'all find when you move your loveseat, but this is what I found under mine when I moved it to make room for the Christmas tree.  I was missing that Chapstick and a spare AAA battery is always nice to have.  I know I felt like I hit a little jackpot. 



Here's a portion of my living room floor, by my entertainment center.  Oh, there are many items of interest here, from a filthy vacuum that needs emptied *and cleaned to the pile of dirty laundry with an old, ratty bra tossed on top, to the poor cat who took refuge (minus that one leg) in her pirate ship. I cannot stress enough that this is in the middle of my living room and has been for days.



This is the view from my living room into my dining room and yes, I know I have a tiny house.  Such is life.  :-)
Please note the beautifully draped curtains in the dining room, the table and chairs shoved aside,  the Christmas tree box, the laundry basket...oh, just all of it.  Bask in it.  And while you're at it, be very, very jealous you don't have a green bungee cord hanging out of your loveseat, too.





Ahhh, the view to the front door.  Please note the pile of towels in front of the TV and the Walmart bag of trash on my front door knob.  Flotsam and jetsam, it's the only way to be thinking right now.  Oh, and that's my recliner I speak so fondly of.  Everyone, meet Recliner. Recliner, meet the people I leave you for.  That's also my 14 year old, 27" TV.  Go me!
 
 

I did buy a new Glade warmer in some holly berry somethingorotherscent the other day.  The entire package made it to the top of the entertainment center along with the new pot I bought for warming scented oils. I did, at least, open that.  Oh, hey, I see my dead cell phone back there now.  I've been wondering where that was.

 

More of the same, different angle, below.   When it is vacuumed, that rug actually has distinct colors.



Lest you think this is all artfully staged like some (a-hem) people do, allow me to show you the cat brush full of hair that has laid on the coffee table for at least 3 days.

 

I will say, my kitchen is fairly clean but we do have a few health hazards going on, like Gina in the napkin basket up on top of the fridge.  Is now the time to share that she has tumors in her ears that tend to open and drain?  No?  Oh, I'm sorry.

 

Well, you'll at least come for dinner, won't you?  We're having a casserole.

 

And that, folks, is what "keeping it real" is all about.  I'm ashamed, yes, but I'm also amused and figured if I can't be a role model, I can at least set a bad example.   Have at me.  I deserve it.  :-D

27 comments:

won said...

I fit into the latter category, of feeling more normal.

That being said, I'll pass on the dinner invite right now...tyvm.

Kristin said...

Oh my that's funny - love the casserole!

That is my house right now, seriously.

I hope you get to feeling more normal soon!

Jae said...

Oh hell, AP. I feel right at home. At the moment, I have rolls of insulation stacked in my living room - in the midst of the other clutter. Your house looks neat by comparison. I don't have a cat in a casserole dish though so maybe we're about even.

Cheryl said...

AP - there is a third group - the ones that want to rush over to help you get it back in order. I'm in that group - but I will eat before I get there. Seriously, it made me laugh, you are one brave woman to put that out there. I like keeping it real!

cupcake said...

My Christmas tree looks similar to yours except mine comes pre-lit. I've had mine up in the living room undecorated since November 30th. I'm thinking maybe today is the day to get it decorated. Thanks for sharing!

Dawn said...

Right now, my living room/dining room is even worse right now becaue the The Bossman has taken over our diningroom table to finish making my grandson's model train layout Chrismtas present.

So all my nice table decorations are scattered wherever I can find a place for them. The tree is up and the lights are on, but the ornaments are still in 2 boxes, sitting next to the tree. I'm waiting for the Christmas fairy to finish decorating the tree.

Thanks AP...for keeping it real!!!

*hugs*

Angel said...

Love the casserole!!

You are so funny!

Tina said...

OK...we must be suffering from the same illness. I normally have the house decorated Thanksgiving evening....I finally have the tree up and I am working on the other things. I just ordered my Christmas cards a few days ago...gasp....I know! I guess people will get them by New Years!

Thanks for keeping it real...

~Hugs

MY LIFE WITH BOYS! said...

LMAO,
OMG, I laughed out loud at the cat in the pan. I love that you keep it real. More people ahem.. need to!

heather said...

ha-ha! my husband and i cracked up at this because there are so many similarities. seriously. the curtains. the tv (12 year old 27 inch). the smallness. the cats. the half-did christmas stuff. just know you are not alone! i hope you will get to feeling better soon. and by the way...would you like a kitten? we have 5 that we can't find homes for. that doesn't include our cats. um yeah...keeping it real! =)

Keli said...

Ok, now I do not feel so bad about my house. Thank you for that. I have not even pulled the decorations out of the attic and I still do not have a tree. I keep saying I need to clean the house before I start on decorating, not sure that will ever happen.

I love, love, love the casserole!!

Deb in MD said...

mmmmmmm, cat fur casserole.....

FalkFamily said...

I love you. Of course, you probably already knew that. That was the best - you are keeping it real ;)

Anemone Pie said...

Y'all are so sweet, and thank you! Not a single horrified gasp amongst you, either. ;-) And Heather, does it look like I need a kitten? That would be a great big ol' NO. But thanks!

PS, Beatrice thanks you all for appreciating her nap spot.

Michelle with a K said...

LOVE this post! I really enjoyed the magnets on your fridge...so very "me".

Jill said...

Your house at its worse is still better than my house at its best!

Just a Thought said...

AP--thank you for the cat in the pan. That really made my day. Thank you for keeping it real too.

Kathleen said...

Gee I can't believe no one did the catserole bit, it was begging me to do it. We are in the midst of moving so my house is extra trashed, (think paths between the boxes and miscellaneous piles of debris) but our everyday look is "organized clutter" meaning it's a mess but I know where everything is. Add in 6 yr old boy chunks here and there, a few clumps of dog hair, and voila! Home sweet home.

collinskid said...

LOL funny post! I can relate... only difference-I have 3 small pomeranians. They cannot get onto the fridge or jump up on the counters-but they sure can get under your feet, or take up your spot in bed.

Your house not so bad-I would feel right at home there...lol. What does that tell you??

Got here from another blog that you had posted on.

Jennifer said...

I think I'll pass on the cat casserole, if you don't mind. I'm allergic :)

You're house isn't bad at all, really. You should see mine after a day or so of me being lazy. Three kids, four cats and a husband who's used to being cleaned up after... it gets bad fast and I'm often lazy.

belladonna1125 said...

That's glorious.

I've been cleaning all day, and I think I've currently achieved the status of your house right now.

Damn.

Suze said...

I love it! Am right there with you. My favorite is the cat in the dish. If I left a dish on my counter for longer than 2 minutes my cat would be right there too! Top of fridge is his favorite place in the whole world! AP, THANKS~!

Corinne said...

You're SO funny:-)

The casserole is awesome!

Pete, Alison and Charlie said...

Hi AP, thanks so much for your message on Charlie's blog. It's good to hear from you, and really nice to know you're thinking of us - I've been a bit out of the loop lately, with everything that's been going on, so it's nice to know I haven't been forgotten!
Loved your messy house post - made me feel SO much better! I'm definitely not a naturally tidy person - unlike my mum - so I always feel like I'm fighting a losing battle trying to keep the house up together! I don't have any cats, but I'm often known to step over a bit of rubbish on the floor for at least a week before I get round to picking it up and putting it in the bin! (And I have carrier bags of rubbish hanging off my door handles too!)
I hope you get your decorations up in time for Santa! Thanks again for checking in, and I hope you have a lovely Christmas.
love, Ali x (PAC)

Nic said...

I just clean under my couch and I will not take any photographic evidence of that disaster area. Lets just say i know where my boys half eaten snacks went.

Nicole

Rebecca said...

Aww, I can tell that your home is essentially beautiful. This too shall pass! It is fun to see that so many of us are quite alike!

Anemone Pie said...

Michelle with a K, I spared everyone the magnet that says "Fuck with me, fuck with the whole damn trailer park." ;-)

Kathleen, I'm ashamed of myself that I missed that beautiful pun!

Hi, Collinskid, it's awfully nice to "meet" you.

Thank you all, the rest of you, for making me feel much better about this mess. Really. And Rebecca, bless you for saying my home is beautiful. I'd never give this one that much credit, but it is home, despite the lack of beauty. It's safe and comfortable, on the street I grew up on with lovely neighbors I knew back then, with my mom 7 houses away in the house I grew up in and in a place where you can walk at night with no fear and leave your car doors unlocked. If I have to live in Florida, I'm glad in this house. :-)